Page 55 of A Sinner's Saint

“I don’t want it. There is only one thing in this world I want and you can’t give me that. Take it back. Friends do not buy other friends cars, Vin.”

“Well, you’ve never had a friend like me before. The car is yours, Cammi. I’m not taking it back. I gotta go. I’m about to board the jet.” He disconnects the call.

“Argh!” I scream as I throw my phone down onto the bed. I’ll figure out a way to return this car to him, even if I have to drive it to Melbourne and leave it in his driveway myself.

I walk back outside and stare at the monstrosity. It is a really nice car. But honestly, even if Vin were still my boyfriend, I wouldn’t want him buying me such extravagant gifts. I don’t need them. I don’t want to be that person. I like Vin for who he is, not what he can get or do for me.

My phone vibrates in my hand, and a message pops up on my screen.

Vin:

Keep the car. It’s part of the story. Think of it as your white carriage. Also, I really want you to have it, Cammi. It makes me feel better knowing that you have a way to get around that’s not on those filthy Sydney trains.

Me:

Okay.

I might have agreed to keep the car, for now, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to find a way to return it to him.

Chapter Twenty-Five

December

It was a mistake to go and see Cammi last month. I didn’t want her to be alone, to celebrate graduating alone. Especially considering the only reason she ran off to Sydney was because of me. I didn’t want to leave her. I wanted to stay. I wanted to give her—us—exactly what we both want.

I wantusback. I’ve been fighting with myself since I saw her. Fighting to not go back and just do it. She’s mine. I can’t let her go, nor do I want to. I also don’t know how to be with her without bringing her down.

I can’t do it to her. I won’t. I’ll end up hurting her more than I already have. She’s in therapy because of me. When she told me she was seeing a shrink, my first thought was that I was going to lose her completely. She’s going to realise that I’m too fucked up of a person for her to evenwantto be with.

My second thought was:I hope it helps her with her sadness.Because she is sad. Again, shame on me for that. I just don’t know how to fix it. It’s almost Christmas now. She’s coming home for a week. Well, to her parents’ house. I know if she’s that close, I’m not going to be able to stay away from her.

“Seriously, Vin, if you’re going to come and hang out here at least pretend to be happy to see me,” Daisy says.

We’re sitting on her sofa watching a movie. I came to Adelaide, because it’s almost Christmas and I didn’t want Daisy to be alone either. Her stomach is getting huge. I wish I could tell Gabe or even fucking Gio that she’s pregnant. Gabe should know. Maybe then he’d lift the fucked-up visitation ban he put on her.

Daisy wants to be the one to tell him, and since my dumbass brother won’t put her name on the visitor’s list, she can’t go and see him to tell him he’s going to be a father. I know our solicitor is working on an appeal, or some shit to get Gabe out on early release. I fucking hope it works too; otherwise, Daisy is going to be raising this kid alone. Well, not alone. Because I’ll always be here but it’s not the same.

“Sorry,” I mumble under my breath.

“Spit it out. What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” Daisy asks.

“You think I’m pretty, Daisy? Like prettier than Gabe?” I ask her with a smirk.

“No one is prettier than Gabe. Now, stop stalling, Vin. Out with it. What’s going on?” Her tone is more firm.

I’ve never been one for therapy, never wanted to sit down and talk to some head quack. I will, however, talk to Daisy. Over the past few months, I’ve slowly been opening up to her about my past, about Cammi, about everything.

“Cammi is coming back to Melbourne for Christmas.” I sigh.

“And that’s a bad thing?”

“I don’t know.” I lift one shoulder into a half shrug. “I don’t have the willpower to stay away from her if she’s so close.”

“Vin, you’re a De Bellis. You have the means to go and see her anytime you want, and you choose not to. You have the willpower,” Daisy says.

“I should stay away from her though, right?”

“Why?”

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