Page 30 of A Sinner's Saint

“Okay. I’m going to text you a place before you land. Meet me there.”

“I’ll be there. What did you end up getting up to last night?” I question her.

“I stayed home and wallowed over the fact my boyfriend’s out of town,” she says. “And I watchedThe Princess Diarieswith my mum.”

“I’m sorry.” I hate that she spent the weekend missing me. At the same time, it’s fucking good to know I’m not in this thing alone.

“It’s not your fault, and I’ll get over it. How was the ceremony? Was it romantic? What about the reception? Did you dance with anyone?” There’s a hint of uncertainty in her voice. Jealousy too.

“It was a wedding. I danced with El once. We all had to,” I explain.

“Are you really okay?”

She can tell I’m barely holding on. I’m out of weed and, honestly, I just want to get back to Melbourne and back to her. I need a few minutes of quiet. “I am. I gotta go. Gio’s calling, but send me the address of where you want to meet. I’ll see you soon.”

“I’ll see you soon.” She cuts the call.

I want so badly to be able to tell her how I feel. It’s not fair to put that on her, though. I know she’s here now, but if she ever finds out about me, she’s not going to stick around. I wouldn’t blame her for it. I’m not a lovable person. I’m not someone whocan love her wholly the way she deserves to be loved, because there’s always a chance the monsters will creep in and mess up my head.

They won’t let me keep her forever. And there’s nothing I can do to shut them up for good. I will, however, take advantage of whatever time I have with her and hope like fuck that it doesn’t completely destroy me when I lose her.

I step off the plane and look at Cammi’s message for the tenth time.

Cammi:

Meet me at the Sheridan. The girl at reception has a key for you. Room 1012.

Me:

Just landed. Be there soon.

I have no idea why she wants me to meet her at a hotel. It’s also not something I’m going to question. Honestly, she could have told me to meet her at the landfill and I’d be there in a heartbeat.

“Where are you going?” Gabe asks when I walk in the direction of the small office at the private airfield.

“I got plans. Catch you all later.” I wave a hand over the back of my head as I keep walking.

Thankfully, he’s too preoccupied by his girlfriend to question me. I don’t think they’ve technically put a label on it, and the factthey are trying to hide that they’re fucking every chance they get tells me Daisy doesn’t want people to know.

She’s one of El’s friends, and not a bad chick. A bit too intuitive for my liking. She took one look at me and could tell I was masking my anxiety. Given she’s a social worker, I guess she should be good at it. It’s what she does for a living. I don’t need anyone trying to work out the mess that is in my head, though, so I plan to steer clear of her.

I pull out my phone and call for an Uber. The hotel is only fifteen minutes from here. I wonder if this is what junkies feel like? Itching for their next hit. My body’s hyperalert. It’s like every fibre of my being knows we’re going to get to touch her again soon.

The moment I push through the doors of the hotel, I make a beeline for reception and give my name. I’m handed a card and directed to a bank of lifts. When I finally reach the tenth floor, I find the door and raise my hand to knock, but it swings open before I can bring my fist down.

“Get in here.” Cammi reaches out, taking my hand and pulling me into the room. Before the door can shut, she wraps her arms around my neck and her body presses up against mine.

I go still. It’s not that I don’t want her to touch me. It’s just that I’m not used to people just doing it. I need a bit of warning.

“Vin, I want you to hug me and I want you to never let go. Don’t ever leave me again. I missed you so much,” she says.

I feel it too. It wasn’t even forty-eight full hours. But, fuck, I hated every second I was away from her. My arms wrap around her waist and I hold her tight. My body relaxes, and I feel like I can breathe properly.

I sink my face into the crook of her neck and sigh. “I fucking missed you too.”

Cammi drops her arms way too fucking soon. “Come over here. Lie down with me.” She drops her robe, and now she’s onlywearing a pair of pink lace panties. “Give me your shirt.” She holds out a hand.

Reaching behind my back, I pull the shirt over my head and hand it to her. As painful as it is to cover those fucking tits up, if she literally wants the shirt off my back, I’ll always give it to her.

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