Page 54 of The Sound of Us

Noah wasn’t the kind of man to care about the state of his house, so I did a double take when I walked into his kitchen the next morning and saw the floor.

“What happened here? I didn’t even know you had tiles.” The three-bedroom red brick vintage home in Forest Glen was too big for just one person, but Noah had bought it from the previous station manager for a bargain basement price. He’d converted the top of the garage into a suite, and the big backyard was perfect for his rescue dogs to play.

“Bella is in town.” He looked up from his tablet. His senior cat, Calico, was asleep in his lap. “I thought I should make an effort, so I hired someone to come in and tidy the place up.”

“Since when do you hire people when you’ve got me?” Part of my deal with Noah included helping with the household chores and looking after his pets in exchange for free rent.

“It’s your final year. You’ve got a lot going on. I didn’t want you to have pick up all my shit just because Bella decided to visit.”

“Your sister’s cool. I don’t think she’d care.” I’d met Noah’s younger sister several times over the years. She was the only member of his family to stay in contact after he’d been disowned for following his dream of becoming a professional musician instead of working in the family business. “But she’ll probably tell you that you look like you need a meal and two weeks’ worth of sleep.Seriously, Noah. She’s going to be all over your ass when she sees you.” Noah’s iconic Misfits tee was so loose around his chest, the skull’s eyes were almost crossed.

“Saving the station has become a full-time job. I’ve never filled in so many applications or attended so many meetings in my life. I think I’ve worn out my bolo tie.” He rubbed Calico’s furry head. “Did you just come here to piss on me or was there a purpose for your visit?”

There were a lot of purposes for my visit, none of which I was able to articulate. There was the fight and the whole scholarship fiasco that meant I was lying to two people I cared about and putting Skye at risk; and then there was Skye making me feel things I wasn’t ready to feel.

I had been comfortable with my hookups and one-night stands. No expectations. No commitments. No heartfelt discussions revealing uncomfortable truths in the middle of the night. Skye had taken my comfortable life and turned it upside down. She didn’t hide her scars behind secrets and ink. She pushed through every barrier that stood in her way. To be worthy of her, I needed to do the same.

“It’s about the fight,” I pulled up a chair at the table, dropping my head to my hands. Might as well start with the easy one and work up to the part where I’d sabotaged the best thing in my life before it even began.

“Did the other guy start it?”

“Some dude at the bar went after one of Skye’s friends who was hustling him at pool. We decided to leave, but he came outside with two friends. Nick and Chad were gearing up to get involved so I took the bastards down so no one got hurt.”

Far from judging me or even being annoyed, Noah smiled. “You defended your friends.”

“You’re missing the point,” I snapped. “I broke somebody’s nose. It was the wrong thing to do. Violence wasn’t the answer.”

“Sounds like self-defense to me,” Noah said, gently movingCalico to the floor. “All that time and effort you put into jiu-jitsu was worth it.”

“Jesus Christ, Noah. I hurt someone. What if I’m like my dad after all?” Then it didn’t matter how I felt about Skye. It didn’t matter about the scholarship. I couldn’t get close because there was no way I could risk doing to anyone what he’d done to me.

“Did you keep hitting them when they were down? Did anyone need an ambulance?”

I stared at him aghast. “Of course not.”

“I didn’t think so.” Noah put a hand on my shoulder. “That’s because you’re not your father. You have the strength and the compassion to know when to stop.”

I let out a shuddering breath. Noah tightened his hand on my shoulder, letting me know he was there but not invading my space while I processed what he’d said.

“You’re a good man, Dante. You’re not your father. You’ll never be him. You’ve changed your name. You’ve cut him out. Now you need to let him go and start living your own life.”

It was the same old discussion we’d always had. I’d been open and honest with Noah when I decided to leave my full-time job at the station and go to college with the goal of becoming a lawyer. But I couldn’t move on. Sasha’s final words were burnt into my soul, and I owed it to her to see my father brought to justice. “I’m living my life. It’s just not the life you want me to have.”

“It’s not the life you deserve.” Noah refilled his cup from the pot in the corner. “That guilt you are carrying is a heavy burden to bear. There is a world of happiness out there if you can just walk away.”

I wanted to believe him. Over the last six weeks I’d had a taste of a life that wasn’t driven by guilt or vengeance. I wasn’t utterly consumed by the black hole at the center of my chest. I’d seen light at the end of the tunnel. I’d felt pure emotion stir my heart, and I wanted more.

My fingers uncurled from the edge of the table, the tensioneasing in my chest. I was going to tell him about Skye and the scholarship. Maybe he could help me untangle the mess.

“There’s something else…”

“Can it wait?” Noah asked. “I need to take a shower before Bella arrives. We’ve got some meetings over the next few days, and she wants me to be presentable.”

“No problem.” I bit back my disappointment. “I’d better go. I don’t want Bella screaming at me because you’re not ready on time.”

“Dante,” Noah called out as I pushed open the back door.

“Yeah?”

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