Page 106 of Succeeding Love

I knew none of those things were it. I know why tonight got to me as drastically as it did.

It was because it was Vin. Because the man I was falling for, the first man I felt anything with in longer than I could remember, was the one at the center of it all.

Reality had hit me hard. Knock me to the ground, literally. I had been living in a fantasy, thinking that my boyfriend was perfect in every way, but that wasn’t the man who was facing off with my drunk ex tonight.

The Vin I saw was no action hero coming to save the day with his level head, cool demeanor and big muscles. All I saw were the muscles, and tonight that scared me. The feral anger was something I didn’t expect.

We were just talking about living together, for Pete’s sake. If he had actually punched Nick, how would moving in together work? Jessie is still very much a daddy’s girl, and she hates violence. Preston might have been okay with it, but that would just have strained his relationship with Nick more.

All the future drop offs and family events would have been so strained. The kids would never feel a moment of peace. It might already be that way.

Even though I had so many reasons to be upset, why did my heart hurt and yearn for Vin so badly still?

Kevin groaned in doggy annoyance as I reached over him for my purse at the foot of the bed. I pulled out my phone after wiping my eyes on the back of my hand. Kevin sat up and licked my face, making me fumble and drop my phone several times before settling him down enough to unlock the screen.

There, at the top of the notifications, was a missed call from Vin. Then a simple text.

My Hero:| I’m sorry, baby. I really am.

Tears burned my eyes again as I stared longingly at the screen. Why did I tell him to go home? Yes, the kids ended up coming back to the house, but he clearly didn’t want to leave things as they were, and right now, all I feel is regret.

So what if he ended up punching Nick? I should have punched Nick, and all things considered, I would have been justified in doing so. So what if they lost their jobs? Nick is a lawyer, and a decent one at that. He could have found a new firm with less repulsive bosses.

And Vin could just come to live with me. We had decided on that anyway, didn’t we? I can be a sugar mam. I make enough to take care of feeding another mouth, even one that’s as hungry as his. I could take care of him.

I mean, the man is older than me, but considering tonight’s events, I’m no longer sure if he is more mature than me or not. More steady on his feet? Yes. Stronger? Definitely. Sexier in every way? Without a doubt. More mature? Surely not. But I doubt there is a man out there that would have been in that situation.

With my phone in hand, I typed up several messages, starting with apologetic, then ranting with exasperation, then deleting everything and simply typing out that I missed him.

That was it.

I missed him, and I was no longer mad. I was just exhausted and empty and wanted him here to hold me and put me back together.

As I went back and forth on what to say, what to type and send, my eyes grew heavier and heavier until exhaustion got the better of me. I knew I would not write anything coherent with my vision this blurry with sleep, so I deleted everything except the “I miss you”.

After pressing send, I let the phone fall out of my hands onto the bed, and then cuddled deeper into Kevin, wishing he was a different Kevin lying here with me.

~

Grrrrr….

I woke to Kevin growling in annoyance beside me, moving his furry body closer so I was hanging onto the bed by a butt cheek.

Still groggy, I opened my eyes to get him to move, but then I saw my phone light going off as it vibrated beside Kevin’s legs.

As I wiped the sleep from my eyes, I reached for it hurriedly to see if it was Vin. He had been the focal point in my dreams, and I just remembered the text I sent before passing out.

But it wasn’t him. It wasn’t a number I recognized at all.

“Hello?” I answered when it was close to rolling over to voicemail.

“Hello. Am I speaking with Feighlynn Micheals?” A woman’s voice asked me in a direct tone.

I checked the clock. It was three in the morning. Who the heck was this?

“Yes?” I said carefully. “Can I help you?”

“Yes ma’am. I’m a nurse at Carris Methodist. We just had a patient come in with you listed as his next of kin. We’re going to need you to come down here as soon as you can.”

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