Page 53 of Perfectly Charmed Pixie

“What?” Vander jerked away from the counter, muscles stiff and voice little more than a low growl. “She followed you here?”

“She follows me everywhere.” I sighed. “I called Solen. He’s my fairy lawyer. Solen said there’s not much he can do since she’s not breaking the law. I have to wait until she does something more up close and personal.” I smiled, but it wasn’t pleasant.

For the first time, Vander’s stillness made me squirm. “You’re staying at the rental house alone?”

“Yes, and before you say anything else, I don’t think Letty will actuallydoanything. She’d be a fool to break fairy law. They’d strip her of her witchcraft if she did.” I stared at a nearby wall, unseeing and finally expressing something I’d felt for a long time. “Maybe I deserve it. Maybe this is still punishment for being such an arrogant fool.”

Vander’s tone was clipped when he said, “I think I’ll need a bit more information to break down all that idiocy.”

Despite the heavy situation, I grinned. “For obvious reasons, not many know the story.” I waved a hand down my body before lifting a lock of hair, letting the colors shift through my fingers. “My only defense is that I was young and…gullible.”

“Typically, that’s a good defense. All of us were that way once upon a time. Some of us never progress.” Vander’s tone was both cool and warm.

“Thanks, but you might change your mind.” I inhaled deeply.

I didn’t want to remember that time in my life. I worked very hard, each and every day, to forget it. Now I was about to do the opposite. I couldn’t delve into all the particulars. That would drive me back into the dark mental hole that had stolen my colors.

Given my hesitation, Vander offered, “You don’t have to tell me, not if you’re not ready.”

“Then you’ll never find out because I doubt I’ll ever be truly ready. Regardless, for some reason, I want you to know. I really was young. Six and a half years doesn’t seem that long, but I’ve aged so much since then.” Some days, I felt downright old. “I’d heard a rumor, and then Iverifiedit on an internet site.” I laughed at how stupid it sounded now. “You’ve heard how addicting pixie dust is to ogres. Everyone knows that. Fairy law has helped a lot, but it hasn’t eliminated captures.”

Vander inhaled, and his knuckles whitened as he gripped the kitchen counter.

“I’d heard that pixies could control ogres, that once they got a taste of our dust, they’d do whatever you asked them just for another taste. The internet site I visited gave away all thesecrets. How not to be the one enslaved but the one doing the enslaving.”

I licked my suddenly dry lips as I let that sink in. That I hadn’t been innocent when captured, that I’d actively courted that fate.

“I was, of course, a fool. I remember thinking how much attention it would bring me, having an ogre at my beck and call. I’d heard all my life how dangerous they were. All pixies fear them. Can you imagine what a rock star I would be if I was the one in control of the ogre?” I couldn’t look Vander in the eyes. “It was all I could think of, all I could dream of. And I followed that dangerous dream until its inevitable end. Not so shockingly, I found out that pixies controlling ogres with our dust is little more than a dangerous fairy tale.

“Jed captured me. I was in that cage for a little over six months. When I was finally rescued, I was a day, maybe two, away from death. I’d lost all my color, and evidently, I was too far gone for it to return. As far as I know, I’m the only pixie who’s been that close to death and survived.

“And that, Vander Kines, is how I lost my color. That is why I do what I do, why I’m willing to give up my life force to be what I once was.”

Vander was silent. I could only imagine what he thought of me, how he regretted comforting me in his arms last night. Goddess, he’d made himself ill working on my charm. He probably thought I’d swindled him, that I was just as superficial as he’d thought when he learned I was a social pixie.

I couldn’t take the silence, the quiet judgment. I didn’t need his accusations or his moral superiority. I’d made my mistakes, and I’d paid for them. I was still paying for them. If Vander couldn’t accept that—couldn’t accept me—then so be it.

With my head up and shoulders thrown back, my wings fluttered to life. I didn’t have anything to grab. I’d even left the keys in the rental car.

“I’ll get out of your way.” I’d leave before Vander could throw me out.

My eyes burned, but I pushed the tears away. I wouldn’t be able to hold them back for long, but I’d at least control them long enough for me to get to the car. I refused to allow Vander to see me break down. Not again. Flying forward, I headed for the hall and the stairs beyond. I didn’t get far.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

My wings beat furiously, slamming into Vander’s shoulders. His arms didn’t move. They were tight bands firmly holding my waist.

“Let go,” I screamed, each repeat of the word escalating in pitch and urgency. The tears wouldn’t wait. They were so close, and I couldn’t fight them forever.

“No.” That one simple word, Vander’s warm breath skating over my sensitive ear. “Never. You think that story would make me hate you? You couldn’t be more wrong. Stop fighting me. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

I gasped, choking on the snot clogging my throat. “You can’t… You…” I didn’t know what I was trying to say. “Didn’t you hear me? I tried to enslave that ogre. I—”

“I won’t argue that you were an idiot. But, like you said, you paid the price. You’d never try something like that again, even if it were possible.”

“You don’t know that.”

How could Vander sound so certain?

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