Page 44 of Sebastian.

The weekend sunlightfilters through the grand oak trees that line my mother’s estate, casting dappled patterns of gold and green upon the manicured lawns. The lingering fatigue from a demanding week as a judge at the court of appeal begins to loosen its grip on my shoulders as I step out of the sleek sedan and inhale the crisp, lavender-scented air.

Mother had her staff set up a table in the gardens for lunch today, and I expected it to be an intimate affair between her and I. To my surprise, though, I see that it’s a large table that has been brought out––four seats instead of two.

While I approach, Clarissa is busying herself with a tablecloth, her nimble fingers securing it with a flourish as if preparing for an extravagant soirée and not a quick repast in the middle of the day. But it's the extra place settings that catch my attention, making me curious, and a little on guard. Two empty chairs stand sentinel, waiting to be occupied by unknown persons. There are definitely people that I would rather not be interacting with right now, and while I don’t think that my mother would try and pull something over on me, I don’t ever assume to understand what she does, or why.

“Are we having guests today?” I inquire, my voice soft yet tinged with a note of uncertainty.

Clarissa pauses, her eyes meeting mine. “It seems so, m’am, but I don’t know who.”

As I take a seat at the table, the sun's warm embrace soothing my skin, I find myself lost in thought. Who could these mystery guests be?

Clarissa serves tea, not even needing to ask what I want or how I take it since she’s been with the family for decades now. I’m early, and Mom hasn’t arrived yet, but it’s a nice enough afternoon that I don’t mind. I continue to sip my tea, the tranquility of the estate wrapping around me like a cherished quilt. This is home, and no matter how chaotic other parts of my life may be, nothing can ever change that.

Yet…Sebastian’s estate, the one we raised our children at, is also home. The idea that I might have to cut ties with the place that I love so much makes me feel so desolate that I have to push the thought away. It’s too soon, too raw, to really consider yet.

I center myself back in the moment with some effort, and force myself to relax. The breeze rustles the leaves in a gentle murmur, but the soft sound is interrupted by the rumble of wheels on the concrete driveway. Emerald green and gleaming in the afternoon light, a vintage car pulls around to the front of the estate.

My eyebrows lift in surprise as the car comes to a halt, revealing its occupants. Dan steps out first, walking around to the passenger side of the car and offering his hand to Elise, who climbs out after him. A smile blooms on my lips as I rise from my seat, the pulse of happiness quickening in my veins at the sight of their familiar faces.

“Well, what a delightful surprise,” I exclaim as the couple walks over.

"Hi, Mom,” Elise greets me with a vibrant smile, her eyes twinkling with an energy that lights up the air around her.

I wrap her in a quick hug, before greeting Dan just as warmly. “To what do I owe this pleasant surprise?”

“Can’t we just come and have lunch with you?” Elise laughs, taking her own seat when Dan pulls it out for her. I give her a doubtful look, and my daughter sighs. “Okay, fine. Oma Margaret told me the horses were ready to go for a ride today, so we came by.”

The corners of my lips quirk into a playful expression. “Oh, nice to know it was because of the horses and not to pay a visit to your dear mom.”

“Oh, enough bickering, you two.”

We all turn to see Mom approaching, her kaftan floating behind her as she walks. There’s a mojito in her hand already, and I’m a bit envious, my fingernails tapping on the ceramic of my teacup.

“Yes, Mom,” I say with a quick chuckle while at the same moment, Elise and Dan echo, “Yes, ma’am.”

As the four of us settle in for lunch, the atmosphere is punctuated by the clinking of silverware and the intermittent laughter that dances like fireflies in the air. Amidst the delicate bites and shared anecdotes, it's Elise who breaks the news that casts a shadow over our gathering. Her words, delivered with hesitation and resolve, causes everyone to stop and pay attention to her.

“I spoke to Dad a few days ago,” she begins, her gaze fixed on her plate for a fleeting moment before lifting to meet my eyes. “He seemed quite worried that you're considering a divorce. He’s…I don’t know…different? More humble, almost, except I don’t know if the word humble could ever really be used to describe Dad.”

The news lands like a stone dropped into still waters, causing ripples of mixed emotions to radiate through the space between us. It’s been nice pretending for these short hours that nothing is wrong, that Sebastian and I aren’t on the verge of divorce, but apparently that respite is over.

“Anyway, we spoke for a bit, and he’s okay with letting Gabi do her job and going after Karl,” Elise continues, her voice steady despite the weight of her words. The name Karl brings with it a wave of negativity so strong that it makes my stomach flip. I know my daughter is waiting for an answer, but I don’t have one for her. Thinking about my husband, and his secret half-brother, renders me speechless.

A pause follows, a momentary silence in which the unspoken thoughts loom between us.

Dan's voice then rises, breaking the awkwardness. “Yeah…Sebastian even invited Elise to be an intern at the company again, but she declined. It seems like he’s starting to come back to his normal self, at least a little bit.”

This surprises me; working with her father, taking over as the head of Van den Bosch Industries when Sebastian retires, has been Elise’s number one dream for so long. Even when there was still the possibility that Andries would take Sebastian’s spot and not El, everyone could see that it was really El who had the drive and the fire to make things happen. When Andries bowed out and Elise took the internship, she was so happy. Seeing the way she slowly lost passion for the job she had worked for has been killing me. I guess I just always assumed that her departure from the internship was only temporary, but hearing that she rejected the offer is a shock.

“You really turned down the opportunity to go back?” I ask her, sitting my fork down.

Elise's voice resonates with resolve. “Yeah, with Karl still there, and the media scandal that he managed to land himself right in the middle of, I told Dad that I at least needed a few months to decide before coming back. I have no interest in being there just to run interference with the press, you know?”

I reach over and place my hand over one of my daughter’s, giving it a quick squeeze. She might not be saying it out loud, but I know that decision couldn’t have been easy for her. I’m sure, just like I do, that she would love for things to just go back to normal. “That’s fair. I understand.”

My mind maneuvers through a maze of feelings as the lunch continues. There is a brief moment of satisfaction when I consider that I’m now good to tell Gabi that she’s free to bring charges against Karl. In reality, though, it sort of feels like a hollow victory. I don’t think Seb has suddenly changed his mind and decided that I’m right. He’s been so manipulative that I can’t help but see his willingness to work with Gabi as just another ploy. In fact, his sudden change of heart, his willingness to cooperate, feels more like a strategic maneuver than a genuine transformation. The inkling that he might be merely using this newfound stance to get the kids back on his side instead of mine makes me uneasy. As easy as it’d be to vocalize this, trying to sway Elise in my direction would be no better than what I believe Seb is doing right now. And on the off chance he’s being genuine, I can’t risk coming off as a bitter and angry wife if he’s really trying to be better. That will just make the older kids come to resent me in the future.

“Well, that's great that you and your dad are finally talking again,” I offer with a small smile, even if it is forced.

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