Page 60 of Taylor

She fought back another wave of tears. “I thought so, too.”

“Fuck, Alice,” he said roughly, running his hands through his hair. He paced and shook them out.

Alice just watched with curiosity, not quite willing to let herself get too hopeful yet.

“When I saw you there tonight... I don’t know. It was like my brain stopped. You didn’t look like yourself.”

“What do you mean?” she asked with a furrowed brow.

“At the gala, when we met, you had on this colorful dress and purple streaks in your hair, and I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you. Then at the cabin...” He came back to her. “You were a fucking rainbow. From your hair to the way you dress, you were so colorful. But more than that, you were so full of life. I couldn’t get enough of you. I just wanted to soak it all up. But then I saw you tonight... It was like all the light was gone. I didn’t like it.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, not knowing what else to say.

Her brain was the one that came to a stuttered stop. If he liked her, why hadn’t he called her?

“Now, if this is how you want to dress, that’s fine. You should dress however the fuck you want. I think you’re beautiful, no matter what, but it just didn’t feel right. Is that how you want to dress?”

She slowly shook her head.

“Okay, so at least I got that right... even though there were a million things I got wrong.”

She walked into her living room and sat on the couch, finally turning on a light. Which might not have been the best idea because he was still in his game-day suit, looking like a fucking snack. She didn’t even want to think what she looked like, but she supposed it didn’t matter. He got the truth tonight. She just hoped she got the same.

“It was brought to my attention that if I wanted to keep dating you after I left the cabin, I should have been calling you and texting you,” he said as he turned to her with a look that almost took her breath away.

“What?”

“I’m sorry. I should’ve been communicating. I thought about you all the time, but then, when it was time to call you, I would be wrapped up in my routine and hyperfocused on the upcoming game... I fucked up.”

“What?” she asked again, shaking her head.

She had thought lots of things when he had dropped off the face of the earth after their time in the cabin... but not this.

He came over to her couch and sat next to her. “Please say I didn’t fuck this up for good.”

She shook her head, gaping at him. “I’m sorry, Taylor, but I’m so confused. We had that amazing weekend, but we never clarified anything. I thought you wanted to date when we got back to Glendale?—”

“I do. I want to be with you,” he said, taking her hands.

“Then, why didn’t you talk to me?” she said with her mind still reeling.

“Because I fucked up. I’m so tied to my routine, I thought about you constantly.”

“You thought about me but didn’t even call me... or text me. Why didn’t you at least text me?” she said with her emotions seeping into her voice.

He winced at her anger, so she took a breath.

“I promise I’ll do better,” he said as he cupped her face.

The feel of his hand on her face was everything. She had missed him so much. Another tear escaped down her cheek.

“I thought I’d made it all up,” she said quietly as he wiped away her tear. “I thought I had fallen too fast and tricked myself into thinking you had feelings for me when you didn’t.”

“No, Alice, I have feelings for you. You didn’t make it up,” he said as his thumb traced her cheek.

She let out another shuddering breath. “I didn’t?”

“No, you didn’t. I’m so fucking sorry I put you through that. I thought we were good, but I realize you needed to know that.”

---