Page 24 of Real

He shakes his head against my shoulder. “Your cock. Please, Timothy.”

“No, baby. Just my fingers, okay?”

He stops rocking and sits up, looking me in the eye. “It’s all fake, isn’t it? Everything you’ve said.” Tears track down his cheeks. “You just said it to make me feel better.”

I didn’t mean for this to be about me, but he has to know how much I want him. I keep my fingers inside him and use my other hand to grab his and slip it between us. I’m sure he’s disgusted by my big belly, but eventually we reach my cock, which is rock hard for him, even though it’s still trapped in my jeans.

Buddy’s eyelids lower with a heady lust that makes me want to yank his pants down and sink inside him with my cock.

“Please,” Buddy begs. “Fill me with your pups. Please. I’ll do anything.”

I shake my head. “I’m just going to get you off. Give you a bit of relief.”

He tugs on the button of my jeans, which are too tight. He can probably feel the bulge of my belly against his fingers.

“No, baby. You don’t have to do that. I’m not—”

He gets the button free and lowers the zipper, slipping his hand inside. I’m simultaneously scared of what he’ll think of my belly and excited that he’s touching me. I wait for him to recoil or mask his disgust, but his eyes stay hooded as he tucks his fingers into the waistband of my underwear and finds my cock.

I let out a loud breath. His hand on my cock is so good I don’t know how long my good intentions will last.

“Please, Timothy.”

“Just my fingers, baby,” I repeat. I want him more than I’ve ever wanted anything or anyone in my entire life, but we’re in a parking lot, and he can’t consent properly right now.

“C’mon. When we get back to the beach house, I’ll make love to you properly, okay?”

His eyes widen with hope. “Really? You will?”

Buddy won’t want me once his heat is over, but that doesn’t matter right now. I give him a deep kiss. “Yes. Come on now. I want to see you come.”

I press my fingers against a spot inside him that makes him throw back his head. I rub against that spot, and his ass clamps down on me, his beautiful face tensing as he gushes all over my fingers. He calls out my name—my real name—and for the first time, I think I understand what it must feel like to have a mate. This moment is so intimate, so special. He looks into my eyes, and the wonder in his gaze is pure. Then he glances down at where my shirt is pulled up over my belly.

I yank it down, but it’s too late. He definitely saw my naked stomach. My cheeks burn hot. I can’t imagine what he thinks of my body now that he isn’t in heat anymore.

I wish the floor would swallow me whole.

11

Buddy

Timothy is looking at me like I’m a real person. Like our souls are as connected as our bodies. Like I matter to him.

I don’t know what to do with all the happiness in my heart. I don’t deserve it, and yet, I’d do anything to make it last longer. I’m overwhelmed by how desperate I am in this moment. Not for sex, but for Timothy. I don’t ever want to let him go.

I glance down at his cock. It’s hard for me. I still can’t believe an alpha like him could get hard while smelling my slick. I want to feel his smooth heat between my fingers again. I want to make him come too.

He pulls down his shirt to cover himself. His face is flushed pink.

“Did I do something wrong?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “I’m sorry. I should go visit Candlewick.”

The high of my orgasm crashes hard as reality sets in. I begged Timothy to fuck me in a parking lot. He didn’t help me because he wanted to but because I climbed on top of him and wouldn’t let him go. We weren’t experiencing a connection. He was just being nice like he always is.

The edges of my eyes burn with tears. He said such wonderful things to me. In the moment, I believed every word. I really thought he wanted me.

I’m such a fool.

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