Page 94 of Five Summers

“Are you feeling better today?” she asks, stooping down to lift him and carry him into the next room.

I follow them, listening to their conversation about a book that Alex wants her to read to him later tonight. Mrs. B settles Alex into one of the chairs at the table.

“Now, his dinner is in the fridge. It just needs to be heated,” I mention, grabbing my keys from the counter and my handbag from its usual spot on one of the old worn-out chairs. “I’m hoping I won’t be home too late.”

“It’s okay, sweetie. Don’t worry about it. Whenever you come home, it’ll be fine.”

I walk over to Alex with a smile, and he watches me as I go around the table. “Now you be a good boy for GG,” I add, leaning down to kiss him on the head. “Love you.”

“Love you too, Mommy,” Alex replies.

I give Mrs. B a quick smile and head towards the door.

I don't waste any time hopping in my old, crappy car and driving to work. The whole time, I can't stop stressing about how the next few hours will go down.

Ten minutes later, I’m parked in my usual spot behind the restaurant. Tonight is huge! Everyone in town is talking about the local boys who've become rock icons. The streets are packed with extra cars, but luckily the bar staff doesn't have to come in as early as the wait staff. I highly doubt that the band has even shown up yet. Judging by the headlines I’ve read over the years, Xander is probably already off somewhere, engaging in his typical activities. Sleeping with anyone who catches his eye. It’s frustrating to witness how the girls constantly chase after him.

I step out of my car, fully aware that I shouldn’t bother locking it. Like, who would wanna steal this old shit box? But if someone actually takes it, I'll have to come up with more money. Honestly, it's tough enough without having to pay for a car on top of everything else.

As I sneak into the restaurant through the back door and hustle through the kitchen, my nerves go crazy. All the chatter in the kitchen is freaking me out.

I know my boss, Nicole, will be somewhere around here, and I do my best to avoid her. She’s always up my ass about something. I know she’ll probably make some snide remark about me taking a few days off because of Alex being sick. It’s just what she does. Thanking my lucky stars that I’ve not seen her, I quickly stash my bag in my locker and head towards the bar.

Just as I’m about to enter the bar, I pause for a moment. Nerves churn in my stomach as I gently push the door open, peering through the crack in an attempt to catch a glimpse of him. Instead, I see Ace, engaged in conversation with an older man, both leaning against the bar. Ace is all grown upnow, nothing like the kid I remember. His arms are a canvas of intricate, vibrant tattoos. Margo, the bartender, hands them their drinks while a steady stream of people pour in through the double doors.

Soft music fills the room, creating a soothing ambiance.

Slowly, I push the door open a little further, and that’s when I see him. Xander's right there, sitting on a bar stool, totally absorbed in the chat with a group of girls. Maybe they're his entertainment for the night. Theo, from the band, sits right beside him. I know this because I made the mistake of reading those fancy magazines I bought at the supermarket whenever I saw Xander making headlines on the cover. I shouldn't torture myself like that, but I just need to know what's happening in his life, even if he doesn't want me. Though his back is facing me, I would recognize him anywhere. My heart skips a beat when they say goodbye to the girls and turn back to the bar, swiftly downing one of the many shots lined up in front of him. He looks so different now, more like a man than the boy I remember. With all that ink on his arms, fuck me, he’s hotter than hell.

I swallow the lump in my throat, knowing I have to go out there. But for some reason, I can’t bring myself to move. Who am I kidding? He probably won’t even recognize me. I was just a plaything, someone he messed around with until it was time for him to leave. My hair is much longer now, and after having Alex, my hips have filled out more, my boobs are bigger, and I’m not the same girl he would remember. I’m just a blip in the life he once had. And why would he want to remember me now that he’s a successful rock star with the world at his feet and an ego to match.

I push open the door, holding my head high as I make my way out to help Margo with the swelling crowd at the bar.

I move to the opposite end of the bar, positioning myself so I’m not anywhere near Xander.

Chapter thirty-six

Xander

Fuck, I completely forgot how boring this town is, and to make matters worse, Jade is here. I forgot how annoying this chick is with her never-ending chit-chat. It’s all coming back to me now, why I used to shut her up by shoving my cock in her mouth. It was the only way to stop her from babbling about all kinds of shit.

I grab my shot glass from the bar and down it, relishing the burn in my throat. I just need to get numb so I can get through this shitty night. I never wanted to come here in the first place, but Ace convinced me. Perhaps I'll talk to that cute bartender at the end of the bar and see if she's down to have some fun later.My eyes wander over her figure. Her long blonde hair, tied in a ponytail, cascades down her back, just above her hot ass, which is exactly my type. Damn, I might even grab hold of that ponytail and have some wild fun until I’m too wasted to realize she’s not who I really desire.

The record label owner, and the biggest pain in my ass, Lionel, is here annoying the shit out of me, as he has done since we first signed with the label. I’ve been eyeing him all night, sitting with his idiot cousin, the mayor of this fucked up town. He expects me to go around shaking hands and bowing to everyone, but honestly, he can suck on my dick for all I care. Our band is his biggest money maker, so I can do whatever the hell I want. I’m not going to suck up to anyone, especially not to these fake ass people in this shitty town who never gave a damn about me or my life. It’s already hard enough dealing with people who only want to be around us now that we’ve become rock gods. Where were they when my life was a living hell? So, no, I’m not going to suck up and shake hands with those stuffy corporate guys in their expensive suits. Screw that.

Reg, the band manager, and Ace are sitting four seats away from me, but I can still hear them yabbering on to some hotshot in a suit, accompanied by his wife or girlfriend in six-inch “come fuck me” heels. Ace introduced me to them ten minutes ago, but I wasn’t interested in hearing from these boring people. I wonder how he’d feel if I fucked his gold-digging girlfriend. Judging by the way she looked at me earlier, I know all I have to do is say something in her ear and she’d be purring for my affection. But she doesn’t interest me. She’s not my type - too snooty and thinks her shit doesn't stink. But I can still pretend to be interested just to fuck with that egotistical bastard and all the others who think I’m something special now just because I’m important. Well, fuck them and their egos. I’m Xander fuckingWilliams. I don’t bow or scrape to anyone. I made myself who I am because of hard work, not because of them.

When we arrived in this town earlier today, my immediate reaction was to confront Poppy’s mother and prove her wrong. Tell her that I am someone of significance, someone who is admired. So, to all those bitter old women out there who looked down on me all those years ago, you can all suck my cock. Then, my father came to mind. But the idea of seeing him again and the immense anger I have towards him, I knew the second I saw that fuckers face, I wouldn't stop. I'm pretty sure I would have killed him the second I saw him. But I stayed away from those two opinionated assholes. They are the ones who are truly unworthy of my time. Just like all the assholes here tonight sucking off our fame.

There were only two people who saw me in a different light compared to everyone else. First, there was Ace, my faithful and trusted best friend. And then there was the girl whose heart I unintentionally shattered, causing my own heart to break in the process. Not this annoying skank Jade, sitting next to me, thinking we were high school sweethearts. She's just here, wanting attention and to feel important. Even Theo isn't flirting with her, and he flirts with every girl he sees. That's how fucking annoying she is.

Downing another shot, I quickly follow it with another, hoping to drown out the incessant bitching coming from the person sitting next to me. Left with only two shots, I grab them and get out of my seat. Jade reaches out her hand to stop me.

"Where are you going, Xander?" she asks, looking up at me and keeping her hand on my arm.

I glance at her hand and then give her a dirty look. “Back the fuck off, and get your fucking hand off me now,” I yell, not caring about those who turn their heads to see what’s going on.

As soon as she removes her hand, I turn and make my way to the empty seat next to Ace, who’s engrossed in a conversation with Reg about some stuff for the upcoming tour.

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