Page 28 of Five Summers

“Yeah, I think so.”

“That still doesn’t explain how you got it.”

I try to evade the question because I don't want to confess about the blowjob or my drunken escapade last night in the hopes of getting another one.

“Apparently, her mom went nuts and kicked out her dad. Her mom trashed everything of her dad’s, but Poppy saved this.”

His lips curl into a cocky smirk as he continues to watch me. “You still haven’t answered my question. Why did she give it to you?”

“Because I told her my dad wrecked mine.”

His gaze lingers on me for an uncomfortable amount of time. “Poppy Reeves, huh,” he says with a hint of amusement. “Who would have thought? Got any secrets to spill? You two hooking up?”

“She's not really my type, you know.”

It didn’t sit well with me to lie to my friend. But I couldn’t risk divulging too many details about Poppy. I didn't want him to know that I couldn’t stop thinking about her - or how I think about her lips wrapped around my cock whenever I jerk off - and how amazing she is at giving head. Because last night, even though I went there hoping for a sexual favor, I ended up just enjoying her company. I don't think he'd understand, because I was having a tough time understanding it myself.

I redirect the conversation to cut off any more of his questions.

“I need a safe place to keep it. Can I leave it at your place?”

“Sure,” he says. “But I know you just avoided answering my question.”

Chapter ten

Poppy

The sound of Xander’s voice singing that song last night repeats in my head like an endless echo. There are voices that are good, and then there are those that are simply extraordinary. They are like rare gems, appearing only once in a lifetime, and they truly grace us with their presence. And that’s the same with Xander’s voice. Anyone with two eyes can see Xander was born for this. His passion and talent shine through in every single one of his movements.

When he opened his mouth, his voice carried a mesmerizing quality that instantly grabbed my attention. Each note he sang seemed to strip away the layers protecting his heart.

Last night, I could feel his unease whenever he spoke about his father. So, I opted to withhold my curiosity and not pursueany additional information. Despite our somewhat friendly relationship, my crush still lingers in the background. Why wouldn’t it? He’s Xander Williams. The guy other boys wish they could be. The guy every girl wants. Yes, I gave him head once, but I won’t allow him to treat me that way again. I'm not a side piece he can toy with whenever he pleases.

Last night, despite his drunken state, I could still see the vulnerability behind the mask he hides behind. I can see he, too, likes to keep things hidden to protect himself. The pain in his eyes was raw and palpable as he told me how his father destroyed the one thing he held closest to his heart.

Without a moment's hesitation, I gifted him my dad's guitar, fully trusting him to protect and care for it. My dad would have staked his claim by now if he wanted it; after all, it's been seven years. Plus, if my mom ever found it, she would just destroy it. It just sits there, hidden away, untouched by anyone, so he may as well make good use of it. The second Xander started strumming it, I knew I had made the right decision.

As always, the moment I arrive at school, I wander the grounds, my eyes scanning, searching for him. But today, he is nowhere to be found, not even in the usual spot where he and Ace always sit together.

With most of the students still outside enjoying the morning before school starts, I move through the busy corridor. That’s when I hear it - his raspy voice, the lingering notes of the song he performed last night. Like a magnet, I am drawn towards him, my feet moving as I follow the sound of his voice.

Approaching the music room, his mesmerizing voice fills the air, leaving me in awe. Determined to see more, I lift onto my tippy toes and peer through the small glass window on the door.

With focused attention, Xander sits on a chair, strumming my father’s guitar.

His voice washes over me, filling me with a comforting warmth, like a cozy fireplace.

On his left, Ace’s fingers danced effortlessly across the keyboard, producing a symphony of rhythmic keystrokes. But my undivided attention is on Xander, my eyes never straying from him.

With each note he plays, he falls deeper into a trance, shutting his eyes as he sings. His voice has a dreamlike quality as if it’s weaving a spell around me. His eyes flutter open and he stares to the left. That’s when I see the few people watching him from the side. There's a long list of girls he hooks up with, including Jade, Savannah, and many others.

The sight of them gazing at him with adoration in their eyes highlights the contrast in how he treats me compared to those who eagerly submit to him. Even though I gifted him that guitar with no expectations, it hurts to be treated as if I'm invisible. It's during times like this that I long for him to view me through a different lens, as he does with them. By doing that, he would be more open to hanging out with me. I wonder if my body shape and the constant weight-related teasing is what keeps him away, or is it something else? When it's just the two of us, he comfortably engages and has no issue hanging out. But it seems like he never wants to be seen with me in public, always keeping his distance.

Just as I'm about to walk away, he looks up. His eyes widen as he catches sight of me standing there. With every note he sings, his eyes never leave mine. My throat tightens, and I struggle to swallow over the lump in my throat.

With the last note hanging in the air, Jade's excitement takes hold, propelling her forward in a rush, clapping her hands. Just as I turn to leave, I see Jade extend her arms towards Xander, as if about to embrace him. I don't stick around to witness theexchange of words. I’ve seen enough to know that he’ll never really accept me for who I truly am.

Throughout the rest of the day, I deliberately attempt to distance myself from Xander. Rather than sitting in my usual spot at lunch, I find solace in the quiet corners of the library. I’d seen enough this morning to put me in a bad mood, and I didn't need a constant reminder every time I saw him with Jade. Plus, it provides me with a quiet space to focus on my homework.

---