Page 182 of Five Summers

“Just so you know, Alex and I are leaving. Xander invited us to move in with him, and I’ve accepted his offer.” I don’t know why I’m even bothering to tell her that. Maybe to make her believe that she’s mistaken about Xander and he wants both of us.

“You’d be a fool to do that. He’ll only break your heart again, and not just yours, but the heart of that little boy who already idolizes him.”

I pause packing Alex's clothes and give her a quick look. “You can either be happy for us and accept my decision, or you can choose to stay here and be upset about your life, not knowing your grandson.”

As I quickly grab Alex’s shoes from the floor, I glance back up to find my mother standing there arms crossed tightly over her chest, her lips pressed together in a display of anger.

“I want you in our lives, but it’s difficult hearing you criticize the one I love. Please, just accept my decision and be involved in our lives.” I stand there, desperately hoping she understands my desire for her to be a part of both my and Alex’s life, and how grateful I am for the time she has been spending with him recently. I want us to keep our relationship going, free fromjudgment, just like a mother and daughter should be. “What do you say? Do you think we can put everything behind us and make a fresh start of it?”

“Are you staying with him?” my mother asks.

“Yes, Mom, I am staying with Xander. I love him. I always have.”

Upon hearing my response, she moves towards the door. Just as she’s about to walk out of the room, she turns to look back at me. “When he breaks your heart again, don’t expect me to be here for you or Alex.”

Her words sliced through my heart, leaving a sharp, lingering ache of rejection from someone who is supposed to love me. Sitting at the edge of the bed, I am left speechless, my mind racing to process her words. It’s hard to believe that she would simply walk away from us like that, especially after forming a close bond with Alex. I could feel her becoming colder and more distant over the years, but I never imagined she would become so heartless.

Rising from the bed, I grab Alex’s bag and exit the room. With a determined effort to hold back tears, I make my way towards the kitchen, hoping to find my mother. To my disappointment, she is nowhere to be found. Feeling a wave of sadness wash over me, I pick up the opal necklace, a heartfelt gift I had purchased for her in Australia, along with a thank-you card where I expressed my deepest gratitude for her kindness in looking after Alex. Placing them on the kitchen counter, I can’t help but feel a tightness in my chest, as if carrying a burden that grows heavier with each step towards the door. The dam finally breaks, and tears cascade down my cheeks.

Chapter seventy

Xander

Leaning against the car, my arms folded over my chest, I watch Poppy enter the house, her bitch of a mother following behind. Despite the years that have passed, she still has a strong animosity towards me. I thought maybe she'd have chilled out a bit by now, but no, she still hates me and treats Poppy like crap.

I wanted to tell her to fuck off, but I held back. I didn't want to interfere with Poppy and her mom. Plus, I've seen them clash in the past and I know Poppy won't take any of her shit. She's always been tough and resilient like that.

As I wait, contemplating what’s happening inside, my gaze shifts to the house two doors down. I can't help but wonder if my old man is in there. He's probably already at work, that’s if he still has a job. But the way he approached me last time I was in this shithole town and asked me for money makes me think he might be jobless. That’s his problem. I couldn’t give less of a shit about him or his fucked up life.

The house looks more run-down than I remember. Maybe the way I'm living now has made me see it as even more run-down than before.

In a split second, I snap my head back around as I hear the front door open, and there he is - the little boy I've only seen on the phone.

“Daddy! Daddy!” he yells with excitement as he bounds down the front steps.

My heart races when he calls me that. Powerful emotions swirl through me and it finally clicks. Poppy’s words make sense. I'll do whatever it takes to protect my boy. I already love him, even though we've never met.

I step away from the car and approach him. Once I cross the gate, he jumps into my embrace, his little arms wrapping around my neck, holding on tightly until our cheeks are pressed together. I feel regret for all the moments I’ve missed with him, but I vow to never let that happen again. From now on, he and his mother are my entire world.

"You came back with Mom," he says, leaning back a bit to look at me. I'm totally focusing on his face, checking out all the tiny details - he's got my eyes, my nose, the same face shape, and his dark hair is the same shade as mine. He's a spitting image of me, and I have the photo to back it up - the one my mom treasured by her bed.

Seeing him makes me feel all sorts of emotions I've never felt before. Tears form in my eyes as I cradle this tiny clone of myself in my arms.

“Can I see the pictures of the kangaroos?” he requests, his curiosity piqued. “And don’t forget the koalas too.”

“Sure,” I say. “Let’s go back out the gate first, and I’ll show you.” Carrying him, I step back through the gate, making sure not to draw any more attention than what had already transpired earlier, just in case Poppy’s mother notices me on her property.

When we reach the rental car, I gently sit him on the hood, letting his legs dangle down over the side.

I reach into my pocket for my phone and casually lean against the car, wrapping my arm around him to prevent him from falling. With just a couple of taps, I pull up the gallery of photos from our zoo trip.

As I hand him the phone, I watch him intently as he looks at the photos. He carefully studies the image and then, using his tiny fingers, he swipes to the next one, thoroughly inspecting each photo along the way. Then he pauses on a particular image - the one capturing Poppy with her radiant smile as she holds a handful of pellets, feeding a kangaroo. Out of all the photos I took of her during our trip, this one is my favorite.

He studies it for a few more moments, then looks up at me with a smile that is exactly like his mother’s. Seeing it brings warmth to my heart, knowing that he is a special mixture of both of us - a flawless combination of his parents.

“Did you feed them?” he asks.

“Yeah, we did.”

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