Page 140 of Five Summers

The crowd erupts in cheers, and I suddenly fall silent as thousands of voices harmonize the next verse of a song. It holds a deep significance for me, a cherished place in my heart that represents my history. I regret the night I got drunk on that fucking stage and sang it as a farewell to her. Little did I know, it would take on a life of its own. If only I could turn back time, I would keep it to myself, preserving the memory of her solely for me. That special moment when I came across that extraordinary girl sitting on the curb, who transformed my life like no one else ever could. I know I need to fix this fucked up situation between us, but I don’t know how. Doing this sort of shit has never come easy for me, but the one thing I’m sure about is that I know she still desires me, just as I yearn for her. But she struggles to accept it.

As the echoes of the last cheers fade away into the darkness, we take our final bow and make our way to the side of the stage.

“Great show?” Ace says, slapping my sweaty shoulder.

“Yeah,” I reply with a smile, using my t-shirt to wipe the sweat from my face.

“Green room now,” Reg says, pointing at me. “Be there for the next two hours, or you’ll receive a call from the record label. And Xander, make sure you engage with your fans.”

He’s been on my back ever since that night I kicked him off the bus for yelling at Poppy. In fact, the tension between us hasbeen constant for years. However, what he said to her that night was completely unacceptable. It pisses me off that he hasn’t even apologized to her yet, so I don’t give a shit about being polite to him anymore. He needs to understand that there are more important things in life than just him bossing everyone around and seeking a bigger bonus from the money we earn. Seriously, our schedule has been incredibly hectic. I’ve been meaning to talk to Kit about who’s pushing us so relentlessly without giving us any time to relax.

During our trip from Adelaide to Melbourne, we were busy with more than twenty radio interviews in different towns. Not only that, but we also had to stay back and hand out merchandise to competition winners. We even had to take photos for our social media and advertising. Who in the world has time to do that? Other than our fucking label pushing us with every marketing opportunity to get more sales. None of us actually enjoy this stuff, but I guess it’s alljust part of the job.

Theo busts into the green room and as usual girls scream and all that other shit. At first, it was great to have people fawning over us, looking up to us, admiring us like we were something special. But after a few years, it became clear that it was only because of who they think we are. Theo and Nate are always keen to share a groupie. Ace occasionally does when he needs to get laid. I’ll admit, I’ve had my fair share of blowjobs, more than the average guy gets in a lifetime, but I never fuck them like I used to dream about when I was younger. I’ve lost count of how many pairs of tits I’ve had to sign my name on. But over the years, the novelty of it all has worn thin. We see groupies the same way they see us - just something to derive pleasure from.

“Keep it down, for fuck’s sake,” Ace yells. I can’t help but smirk as the perpetually grumpy Ace shows his true colors.

Immediately, my eyes scan the room, searching for Poppy. It comes as no surprise that she’s not here tonight. When we first started the tour, she used to come to the green room almost every night, except for the night her mother called to inform her about Alex.

Those first few nights in the green room, two groupies approached me. Curiously, I observed Poppy’s reaction, and I must confess, I felt a sense of satisfaction when I noticed her jealousy. As the two groupies shamelessly voiced all the dirty things they wanted to do to me, Poppy abruptly got up and left the green room.

Ace heads straight for the table where the drinks and food are located. I follow closely behind, pausing when a blonde woman in a short dress suddenly rushes over and jumps on me. She wraps her legs around my waist and kisses me. I pull back, intending to tell her to get the fuck off and express my outrage that she kissed me, but before I can say a word, she forcefully kisses me again.

Reacting quickly, I push her away, disregarding the fact that she falls to the floor with a loud thud.

That’s when I notice Nicole, the PR girl, taking a photo with her phone. Frustration wells up inside me as I approach her. I’ve had enough of this shit. All these staged pictures of me with random chicks, it’s not real. I wouldn’t be surprised if the damn label orchestrated this whole thing, using scandals to boost sales.

“What the fuck, Nicole?” I grab her phone, swiftly deleting the photo.

The room falls silent, and I can sense all eyes fixed on me. I’m not concerned about anyone capturing this outburst because, as a condition of being in the green room, everyone has to surrender their phones before entering.

“I’m sorry, Xander,” she says, glancing at Reg and then back at me.

I remain silent, returning her phone without uttering a word. That fucking asshole, Reg, will go to any lengths for publicity.

“I’m outta here,” I yell to Reg, frustration evident in my voice. “I’ve had enough of this shit. And you can go to fucking hell.”

As I make my way towards the door, a forceful hand yanks me back, stopping me in my tracks.

“Walk out of this room now, and it will be the last thing you do,” he shouts angrily.

Determined, I break free from his grip and continue through the doorway. I hear footsteps trailing behind me. Just as I’m about to unleash my anger on Reg, a hand gently lands on my shoulder. A familiar hand. Ace.

"That guy seriously annoys me on purpose," I comment. “He's willing to do whatever it takes to get shit in the media. I can't deal with him anymore. Last week, I almost lost it when he started on Poppy.”

“Yeah, I can see it now. He was totally out of line in there.”

“We gotta do something, Ace. It’s spiraling out of control.”

“I totally agree. We need to have a band meeting, and Reg shouldn't be there. I’ll head back in and sort it out,” Ace says as we get to the door.

Pushing open the exit door, I feel the refreshing coolness of the night air against my sweaty skin, providing much-needed relief. I swiftly make my way down the steps, taking them two at a time, and step onto the bus. Instantly, my eyes scan the area, desperately searching for Poppy. My heart drops when I don’t see her, knowing she’s still avoiding me. It’s so frustrating not having her by my side.

The sound of heavy footsteps reaches my ears, but I don’t bother to turn and see who’s boarding the bus.

“Get your ass back in there and greet your fans,” Reg’s voice commands.

“Fuck off,” I add, reaching for a bottle of whisky from my secret stash. I asked Kit to make sure it was fully stocked for our next trip on the tour.

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