Page 66 of Gift-Wrapped in a Kilt

"I fell apart," he said, unable to keep the self-loathing out of his voice. "Leanne kept me going, she's the only reason I wasn't holed up in bed with my head under the covers. I always thought I was strong, but I found out I wasn't at all. Leanne took care of me, but Calli had to do everything else. Make funeral arrangements. Talk to a lawyer. Do the probate crap. You know the rest."

He should've moved away from Jamie, not let her comfort him, but he couldn't budge an inch. He'd never explained how he felt about all of this. Didn't want to tell her now. She deserved to know the whole truth, though.

Afterward, if she'd rather be with Trevor, he wouldn't stop her. She deserved a real man who could take care of her when terrible things happened.

Scratch that. He'd do whatever it took to stop her from going back to Trevor — but he'd feel bad about it. He'd rather be a selfish prick than live without her.

"By the time I woke up and manned up," he said, "six months had gone by. Leanne left me not long after. I couldn't blame her, not after all the drama I put her through. She said I was stifling her, and she needed to find herself in New York. Walked away and never looked back. I got a job in Minneapolis to be closer to Calli. We didn't talk about our parents. After she got her master's degree, she moved to Michigan for a job."

Jamie's chin stayed on his shoulder. "And you were alone."

"Yeah."

"Were you lonely?"

He rubbed his neck. "Uh, yeah, I guess. Some tough guy I turned out to be."

She pressed her lips to his neck. "Are you expecting me to be disgusted with you?"

"If I'd been a real man, I wouldn't have let my sister get roped into marriage fraud. That's a real crime, you know."

"Everything worked out." Jamie girded her arms tighter around him. "Calli met Aidan, and they're very happy together."

"I know. I'm happy for her, but —" He clapped his mouth shut. No way would he say those words, the ones he'd thought when he was talking to Calli a few weeks ago.

"You feel like Aidan stole your sister."

"Sort of. I know it's dumb, but… well…"Shit. He had to tell her. Enough keeping his stupid thoughts to himself. Talking was supposed to be cathartic, right? "I'm the last living member of the Douglas family. I'm alone."

Jamie crawled in front of him, twisting around to face him. "You are not the last member of your family. There's Calli and baby Sarah. And your cousin, Tara."

"Calli's a MacTaggart now, and Tara got married too. I'm the last one."

"Gavin —"

"It's true, Jamie." He dropped his chin so low it nearly bumped his chest. "Calli has a new family. She moved to Scotland for Aidan, to become a MacTaggart. Everyone I've ever loved has abandoned me."

Jamie splayed a hand over his cheek. "I haven't."

"Not yet." He laid his hand over hers on his cheek. "But if I can't make your brothers happy, we don't have a future together. You said that."

She opened her mouth, seeming like she was about to speak, but stopped.

Yeah, there was nothing left to say.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Thanksgiving sneaked up on Jamie. She woke up one morning, and the day was here. Though Lachlan and Erica celebrated the American holiday, and Calli and Aidan did too, each couple commemorated it in private. Today would be the first MacTaggart family Thanksgiving, in honor of their newest American addition, Emery.

MacTaggart family Thanksgiving? Jamie cringed inside. A week ago, Gavin had confessed to her he felt abandoned and alone, not a part of a family anymore. She'd wanted to assure him it wasn't true, but she couldn't. His sister had left America to marry a Scotsman, and she planned to apply for citizenship as soon as she became eligible. Gavin had good reason to feel abandoned.

Still, she should've said something that day. She should've told him he didn't need to please her brothers because she loved him enough to give up her family to be with him. A part of her balked at making that sort of promise again. She'd been willing to give up everything for Trevor, and he threw it back in her face. She loved Gavin so much more than she'd ever cared for Trevor. If he threw her away…

Had she ever told Gavin how much he meant to her? She'd declared they had no future unless he got along with her brothers. Why had she said that?

Jamie halted with her hand on the knob of the bedroom door. The sounds of family chatting and laughing she'd heard earlier drifting down the hall of the guest wing from the sitting room and the dining room had ceased. Everyone must've tramped upstairs. The dining room hadn't been large enough to accommodate the entire family, so they'd made use of the great hall.

Gavin would be here soon.

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