Page 29 of Rise of a Fallen Man

Once again, I was fleeing the gladiators’ party, feeling weak and defeated, but I had to put an end to this insanity.

The games master got up with me. “Allow me to escort you, Your Highness.”

I kept my head straight as she led me out of the room. From the corner of my eye, I glimpsed Salas conversing with Naeco, the games choreographer, and another gladiator. Absorbed in their conversation, he didn’t appear to notice my leaving, which was for the best. I didn’t think I could manage to say goodbye without making it obvious how hard parting from him always was for me.

With the games master escorting me, I had to at least pretend I needed to visit the bathroom before leaving the gladiators’ quarters. I followed her down the main hallway to where it turned into the left wing. The bathroom was a spacious room decorated with flowery wallpaper, upholstered furniture in gilded frames, and a marble sink next to a long vanity with a large mirror.

“Let me know if you need anything at all.” With these words, the games master departed, finally leaving me alone.

I turned on the polished brass faucet, took my glasses off, and splashed the cool water on my face.

He shouldn’t have this effect on me. Not anymore. Not now. I had my future laid out for me, and Salas couldn’t be a part of it. His life was safer without me too.

Except that everything inside me ached for him.

When coming to the gladiators’ quarters, I just hoped to make sure he was okay. But seeing him this close again was like all those weeks without him hadn’t happened. Like I had every right to touch him again. To kiss him. To be with him.

My face in the mirror looked flushed. My eyes glistened as if ready to cry. How could I go back to that room now? How could I face them? Or him? I couldn’t even say goodbye.

I had to leave.

I’d arrange for generous gifts to be sent to the games master later, as an excuse for yet another lame escape.

I turned the faucet off, wiped my face and hands dry, put my glasses back on, and left the bathroom. As a civilized adult, I should at least let Gem know that I was leaving and taking her carriage, that I’d send it back for her later, but the sound of the door opening and closing came from the central wing, and I realized I wasn’t ready to face anyone right now, not even a servant to send the message to Gem.

The world inside me felt like a ravaged land after a hurricane. I needed a moment to compose myself, at least enough for my hands to stop shaking and my heart to slow down a bit.

The left-wing hall ended with a large stained-glass window with partially opened curtains and a window seat. I hurried to the window, climbed with my knees onto the seat, and pressed my feverish forehead to the cool glass, hiding in the shadows of the curtains.

Heavy droplets of rain hit the glass, then rolled down, leaving behind trails like streams of tears. I desperately searched for peace inside me, and couldn’t find it.

Chapter 8

Salas

I’d taken my eyes off Ari for a mere second, just to reply to Regit’s question about the healing witch who had treated me. But when I glanced again at the couch where she’d been sitting with the games master, Ari was no longer there.

I hadn’t expected her to come here today. They said the princess had only come to the gladiators’ quarters once, years ago, and she hadn’t stayed for long.

The urge to believe she was here because of me was too strong to resist, but it was a dangerous path to take. Three high-born princes vied for Ari’s attention. Soon enough, one of them would become her husband. The best I could do for my sanity was to stay away from the crown princess.

Yet I’d lasted only for a minute in the room without her. The pull to go after Ari was so strong, I feared it would wrench my heart out of my chest if I didn’t follow.

As soon as Regit and Naeco got distracted by a new group of fine ladies arriving at the party, I headed for the door.

A servant passed by with four empty wine bottles on his tray.

“I’ll take them out,” I volunteered, grabbing the bottles off the tray and leaving the room before anyone could stop me.

The central hallway was deserted.

Did she leave already?

It’d be for the best for both of us if she did. But sadness gripped my heart so hard, I was ready to run all the way to the palace after her.

I walked along the corridor to the corner with the bathroom, then turned, unsure what to do next.

At the end of the east-wing hallway, I spotted a flash of her royal-blue dress between the burgundy drapes of the stained-glass window. The rain clouds darkened the afternoon from silver gray to charcoal. With the scone lights off, the hallway descended into a soft semi-darkness. I wouldn’t have noticed Ari kneeling in the window seat had I not been looking for her.

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