“Are you planning to pay the debt of all slaves in Rorrim then? Because as the future ruler of the country, you can’t favor any one person without considering the impact it would have on the rest.”
I pushed away from her desk and crossed my arms over my chest.
“Noteveryslave was in my bed last night, Mother.”
The political implications of my decision were the reason I came to speak with her in the first place. I knew what I had to do, but I needed to figure out the best way of doing it.
This time, the queen remained as calm as the surface of the pond in the royal gardens on a windless day.
“Our agreement with him stipulates the sum of one year, Ari. Why would you amend that?”
“One year is not enough. I don’t want him to be a slave for even a day longer.”
She folded her hands on the table. “And why is that? Do you feel remorseful about spending time with a man so much below you in station? Do you think elevating him would make you feel better?”
I groaned in frustration. How could such a highly intelligent woman like my mother get something so simple so very wrong.
“I don’t want just to ‘elevate him.’ I want him—”
I realized I was going to say “happy.”
After just two nights spent with Salas, I already cared about his happiness and wellbeing. Eventually, we’d part, and I’d never see him again. But I had to know that he was free and happy out there somewhere, living a life that he could never have if he remained property of the slave owner.
“I want him free,” I said instead.
Mother studied my face. “It would take a considerable amount of money to buy his freedom, Ari.”
“I know. I’ll take it from my annual allowance, or I can sell some of my jewelry to bypass the necessity for council’s approval.” I could go without a few new dresses, and I certainly had enough diamond necklaces to last me a lifetime.
“You cannot keep a move like that from the council. It’d bring more harm if you’re discovered hiding something like that from them.”
“Then I will disclose my intentions at the next meeting.”
“There is a strong chance they will not support it.” Resting her elbows on the table, the queen pinched the bridge of her nose. “Either way, they will demand an explanation.”
“I can explain—”
“How?” Mother pinned me with her stare. Her disappointment was almost palpable. It crushed my heart. “How can you possibly explain your sudden interest in this slave? How can you even admit it publicly, without inviting all kinds of questions and risking a slew of malicious rumors? Especiallynow, when we’re facing dowry negotiations and every misstep on our part could mean a loss of valuable concessions?”
“So, having the man in my bed is not a problem. But buying his freedom is?”
“Exactly. It’s perfectly acceptable for a young woman to gain some sexual experience before her marriage. Anything more than that, however, makes it look like favoritism. We don’t want anyone to think you have taken a lover. Not while your marriage is being arranged and negotiated.”
I huffed in frustration.
“I can fuck him, but I’m not allowed to care for him.”
The queen flinched at my choice of words, but her voice remained steady when she explained, “The crown princess only cares for her country, her family, and her husband. In that exact order. Taking a lover at this time would indicate to the foreign powers that your interests lie elsewhere and that their union with us may lack commitment on our part.”
“But I’m not taking a lover.”
“Your action will be interpreted as if you were. Doing him favors of such magnitude implies it.”
I scraped a hand down my face, disheartened but refusing to give up.
“I feel very strongly about this, Mother, enough to stand in front of the council and defend it until my voice is gone. However, if there is any other way to do it, I’ll consider it.”
Resting her elbows on the table, she placed her chin on her fingers laced together. “Tell me, daughter, why do you care about this slave?”