Tears gathered at the corner of my eyes.
Why was I always so weak and small? Why had the Allfather given me the smallest portion?
“You will have to do penance,” Generosity sing-songed to me, her pretty mouth set in a triumphant pout.
I craved being her friend so badly, but she never once would let me in.
“I am trying,” I said.
“Maybe you’ll get left behind with our next move,” Generosity said, her eyes sparkling with malice.
Occasionally, if we had to move camp in haste due to territorial disputes with other Congregations, elderly or disabled Congregants would get left behind, to crawl away if they could, but most likely to be caught and killed by whatever Congregation was driving us out of our land.
My face flamed with shame and embarrassment, everyone looking at me and knowing how weak I was.
And then my brother was there, dropping his fish into my basket so it was filled to the brim.
“Shewill never be left behind,” Rhyder said angrily. “You don’t have to worry, Temperance. You willalways have me to take care of you.”
Rhyder’s white shirt was wet, stretched across his broad chest, his golden hair shining in the spring sunlight. I saw Generosity swallow as she saw him. I knew the girls my age all thought he was the handsomest and wanted him to Climb for them.
But, as usual, he didn’t have eyes for any of them. Only for me.
With one big hand, he grabbed me and lifted me dripping out of the water.
“Good job,” he said, his eyes warm as he looked at me.
My teeth were chattering so I couldn’t have responded even if I wanted to.
But I could have said:
No, I didn’t do a good job
You don’t see me correctly
I’m your blind spot
Everybody else gets your unflinching zealous piety
I get your only mercy
And I knew when Generosity turned burning eyes to me that she hated me because of my brother. She wanted him badly but he didn’t want her.
Only me.
I wanted to scream at her, “you think I haven’t tried to change his mind?”
At that moment I thought I’d give anything for my brother to be like the other men in the Congregation, or even to love Generosity to she wouldn’t hate me.
But he never would.
Generosity turned aside with a bitter frown as Rhyder plunged his cock inside me, his lips already insistently searching for mine.
“How beautiful you looked with my hand on your ass,” he groaned loudly. “Prettiest thing I’ve ever seen is my handprint there. God, I just want to tear into you, sister.”
He was taking me hard and fast, each thrust grinding me against the hard bark of the tree, each stroke accompanied with his loud, triumphant voice calling out his lust and his love.
And he couldn’t let me just be taken anymore. Not now that he knew all my dirty, depraved secrets. Like that there was a straining, thirsty place he could rub and suck and get exactly what he wanted from my body.