Page 2 of Burning Your Lies

This time I can’t stop it. My chest caves and I let out a sob. “You said you would let me go.”

“No. I said I wouldn’t kill you.”

There must be an escape. There has to be some way to prove he set this up.

And then it hits me.

“The cameras.”

There’s no panic as I expected. Instead, he looks smug. “I stole a move from Emery. Can you guess which one?”

Running towards the light switch, I flick it on and off, but the only light that remains is the stupid candles I lit. With a crumbled resolve, I say, “The breaker.”

“A smart move by my conniving wife.”

I go back to that night; the one where Emery told me to run while I can. I should have listened. I should have packed my shit and got the fuck out of here. I can see Emery stood in the dark shadows of the room, begging me to think faster, harder and smarter. And then suddenly I’m laughing. “The generators turn on within ten minutes.”

His nostrils flare. “If there were generators, don’t you think I would have seen you weren’t in the guesthouse? Do you think of me as a moron? An idiot? A fool? There’s no proof of anything.” He thought of everything. Any route I had to escape is blocked by him.

As he stands there and watches me, I feel nothing but hatred.I want him dead.My feet have a mind of their own, because before I can blink, my hands are around his neck. If I’m going down, I’m taking him with me. “I’m going to kill you! I’m going to kill you!” My screams are incoherent as I’m pulled off him. I can’t hear what they’re saying over the chaos in my head.

Xavier’s pathetic pleas burn through it all. “Tell me where she is, Savannah! Tell me where my daughter is!”

“He set me up! He did all this!”

Unlike before, when he steps towards me, it’s with caution. His eyes fill with crocodile tears. “You tried to steal my baby. Where is she? Please?”

I don’t hear what the doctor says to him. I can only concentrate on breaking free from their tight grip. No matter how much I scream for them to believe me, they’re more concerned about him. When one of them loosens their grip for a second, I take my chance and charge at him. “You did this!”

My fists barely touch him before I am being forced out of the house. As they lead me to the awaiting car, all I can think about is how stupid I was to think I could beat him. This was all my fault. I brought this upon myself by signing that contract, despite knowing better. I did this to myself, when I felt the camera in the wall and believed him. I did this to myself when I climbed into bed with him. I did this to myself when I accepted his fucking diamonds.

At that thought, my fingers grip the necklace he gave when he promised a future. I yank it until it breaks loose. As if it was a noose around my neck, my throat opens and I gulp in the cold air. And for just a moment, it feels like I am alive.I survived.

But I am dead. Perhaps Xavier didn’t physically kill me, but he killed every other part of me.

I don’t move when he pulls me close to him. The arms I once found comfort and love in feel like my coffin; confining my corpse with a promise of no escape. His voice is so low, I can barely hear it over the wind. “Zugzwang.”

I stare out the window for the entire drive. One doctor sits in the back with me and keeps her eyes trained on me. I mindlessly walk wherever they pull me, because it doesn’t matter.I lost.After everything I sacrificed, I stilllost.

They hand me a tablet with the promise that it will help me sleep. They watch me take it. Then I am all alone in the cold, empty room.

In the silence, all I can hear is Xavier’s whisper of victory. And just before the drugs kick in, I realise I am truly his prisoner.

2

Huxley

The thrumming in myveins makes the wait seem longer than it is. I take a sip of my whiskey, hoping the page would load in those few seconds. When it doesn’t, I sigh into my empty room.

I close my eyes, hoping I can forget Savannah for just a few seconds. The broken look on her face haunts me. She truly believes the fiction she’s created in her mind. I pick up the CCTV image of Elliot. I saw him once, but briefly. I paid little attention to him, because I was too busy stewing in jealousy that he was talking to Savannah. Still, my gaze focuses on the man facing away from the camera. It looks like him, yet Savannah firmly believes it’s an imposter.Is there a chance she’s right?

I mentally flick through every conversation I’ve had with Xavier the past few weeks, trying to see if I’ve missed something. But the more I ponder, the more certain I am that Savannah needs professional help.Hell, maybe me ordering a hit on her father and his rape club has a part to play in her paranoia.

With the loading circle still on my screen, I stand up and grab a cigar from my collection. It’s a rare treat, but after theday I’ve had, I’ve earned it. Striking a match, I’m momentarily hypnotised by the flame. Savannah is back in my vision, but this time she isn’t crying. Her eyes house the determination I know her for as she vows to burn his lies.

Taking the cigar back with me, I check to see if my results have loaded.What’s taking so fucking long?

I pull a long drag and wait for the relief that usually comes. Except my brain is on high alert and the weight on my chest is too hard to ignore. The conversation with Savannah keeps replaying on a loop. A nagging lingers in my thoughts.

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