“Seriously though. I’d like to think I was Al Capone, Manson, or maybe even Pablo Escobar. Someone who did terrible things. It’s the only explanation as to why we are burdened with living this life we live.”
“We’ve had everything we could have ever dreamed of. Money has never been and will never be an obstacle,” I answer, knowing that’s not really what he means.
“But at what cost?” he says, lowering his head. It’s then I feel it too. I’m kidding myself if I honestly believe that I could ever be happy with Scarlett. Happiness isn’t in my path.
“Happiness. Love. We can fool ourselves into believing we might somehow still be worthy, but the truth is, how can we be? We don’t even understand what it truly means.”
“And that will be our downfall, brother,” he says, jumping off the stool and patting me on my back. “Those girls won’t be our salvation. They’ll be our destruction.” However, as he walks out the door, once again, I can’t help but disagree.
Chapter
Three
SCARLETT
Iknew last night was going to be a game-changer. That coming here was going to be a matter of life or death, but I never imagined that even though I followed every rule, did every wicked thing he asked of me, that someone would still pay for it. Someone would lose their life, and another would pay the price. Drake lies before me, beaten half to death after I followed every rule to keep him away, but he kept digging and found things he shouldn’t have.
Once again, I made a deal. I’ll continue time and time again to sell my soul to save those innocents around me. I promised I’d keep Drake away from everything, out of Servite’s businesses, and in return, he got to live. A small price to pay, I’d say.
However, Chaz wasn’t as lucky. I can’t say he didn’t deserve it, for being an all-around terrible human being. Most of all, for trusting in her. For believing he meant something to the woman who only cares about herself. She doesn’t even care for her daughter, her own blood.Why would he mean anything to her?
But unlike her, Drake, Jade, and all the kids from the Graysons’ foster house I grew up in are my family. They mean everything to me, and I'd sacrifice myself time after time to save them.
That’s exactly what I do once again.
Call me selfish if you must, but only my life deserves to be ruined by the devil on my shoulder.
I walk back into the room they’ve assigned me to, dragging my swollen, blistered feet. Once inside, the room feels cold and empty, but I believe that’s only a semblance of how I’m feeling on the inside. I find the candles surrounding the room are no longer burning, making the space eerily dark. It’s nearly sundown, the sun slowly setting, hiding away from the world for the night, and the lights that were illuminating the yard last night are nowhere to be seen. It’s as if the world around me is in mourning, at least it feels I am. Walking over to the vanity beside the balcony where I witnessed last night’s events, I find a case of matches sitting beside a large black candle. I grab the matches quickly, lighting the candle as I look up at the wall before me.
A large oval mirror hangs, an intricate golden halo surrounding it. The delicate details of the golden metal look like antique vines intertwined with one another. I gaze intently at the figure before me, staring deep into her solemn eyes. I wouldn’t recognize her if the circumstances were any different from they are. If I didn’t understand firsthand her agonizing pain and sorrow.
Dark circles framing her red-rimmed eyes. Lips stained blood red and swollen. Last night’s makeup smeared across her cheeks, remnants of the tears that slid past them marking the marred skin. The delicate and luxurious crimson silk, torn and stained with blood, to look like what remains of her will. I look like a godforsaken mess, a helpless fool, a natural disaster. An occurrence of such magnitude that shook my life and flipped it on its axis and left what remains of me battered and bruised. This is what a body must look like after its soul retreats and makes its way to purgatory. This is my purgatory. I once believed my life to be mypersonal hell on earth, but it was nothing compared to what will come. I am floating in the thin space between worlds, hanging in limbo with no way out. My only option now - walk these tar-stained streets with my head held high.
They may have broken my soul, beat it to its bloody end, burned it to a charred crisp, but what remains in these ashes is the will of my vengeance. A Phoenix burns only to be reborn. It rises from its ashes, the majestic creature that it is. I am no Phoenix. I am a sinner, a tainted saint. A corrupted angel sent to hell to destroy it and redeem my soul. I’ll burn in these flames only to rise and destroy those who set me aflame.
I’m no damsel in distress, no princess in need of saving. I am the embodiment of retribution. A glimpse of the reckoning that is to come at my own hands. I will be my savior.
May the devil have mercy on their wicked souls because I sure as hell won’t.
Chapter
Four
SCARLETT
Have you ever had an out-of-body experience where everything around you is happening so fast, but you feel as if you’re moving in slow motion, on the outside looking in? That’s exactly how I feel as I step into Ace’s SUV, heading off toward the cabin he rented for our week off school. It’s the last place I want to be, with the last person I want to be with, but Jade, Stella, Kai, Ruby, and Jax are already there. If I’ve learned anything today, it’s that I must continue to play a part in all of this. As much as it makes me sick to my stomach, I must move on.
Wesley assured me they would get Drake checked out by a doctor and he’d be off to a full recovery back at Astor House. Honestly, his words mean nothing to me. He is the reason Drake is in the condition he’s in. He’s the one that ordered the Horsemen to beat the life out of him. I know it was him. I cringe at the thought of what could have happened to him had I not walked in when Idid. If I hadn’t heard his agonizing cry.Would they have killed him like they did Chaz?
Ace and I head to the cabin, with the Horsemen following closely behind us in Bass's car. I’m not sure what we’re going to say happened to Drake when we arrive. I’m sure they’ve been looking for him, and if I’m right, Agent Servite had Drake locked up for two days. I keep my eyes on the road ahead, not wanting to acknowledge Ace beside me. I can feel his stare on me, trying to burn through me and get a glimpse inside my mind. Unfortunately for him, he won’t be able to make out the warped thoughts flowing through it.
"He had it coming," Ace blurts out, breaking our deafening silence. I can’t help letting out a chuckle, not able to keep quiet any longer.
“You sound just like him,” I sneer, keeping my gaze out the window before me. "It's the same pretense he uses to do what he does. He had it coming, he deserved it. It’s all just a cowardly justification for your wrongdoings." I turn and glare at him, noticing the way his fingers grip the steering wheel tightly, his tongue moving angrily in his mouth.
“I'm nothing like him.” He growls, keeping his gaze locked on the dark road ahead of us. I laugh once again at his remark, as I see the blood rushing to his knuckles, his fingers gripping the steering wheel even tighter.
"Like I said once before, you're two men cut from the same flaming cloth. Two sinners who disguise themselves as saints to avoid damnation. At least be man enough to admit it. He is." Ace hits the brakes abruptly, causing me to slam my back against the seat, the seat belt tightening on my chest.