Page 135 of Aching for His Discretion

Walking into the nursery, I smiled brightly at my little baby boy. “Hello, Silas, hello, Mommy’s baby! Hi!” I said in a slightly high-pitched voice, and he immediately wiggled around in his swaddle, eager to stretch his legs and arms.

Grayson hopped onto the dresser and watched as I unstrapped him. I gasped as Silas immediately stretched his limbs while Grayson did his own stretch, which ironically was a downward dog.

“What a big stretch for the little baby,” I cooed and slowly picked him up afterward as he fell into his adorable newborn scrunch. Holding him to my chest, I placed soft kisses on his cheek as I felt a hand being placed on my lower back above my jeans. Looking up, I smiled at Levi, who placed a small kiss on my head and on Silas’s head.

“You look so fucking adorable with him. It almost makes me want another one…” he muttered, and I shushed himimmediately as I pulled away to place our baby on the changing table.

Levi stood behind me and kindly grabbed a diaper, wipes, and powder while hovering over us. I placed his hands on my hips, and he hummed as I began changing Silas.

“Silas needs Eden, you know,” he continued shamelessly. He frequently talked about how Silas would be happier to have his sister Eden, and I rolled my eyes at his antics.

“There is a fifty percent chance we’ll have another boy, Mr. Amante.”

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take, Tesoro.”

“How am I ever going to get away from your daddy, Silas?” I asked as I finished strapping his onesie, and I giggled as Levi hid his face in my neck.

His phone buzzed, and he sighed as I picked up Silas and turned to face him.

“I have to leave soon. I don’t think I’ll be able to drive you to the clinic today, Tesoro,” he muttered, and I shook my head as I leaned into his embrace.

“Don’t apologize; you’re busy. I understand,” I whispered, and he hummed as his hands groped a handful of my butt while his lips met mine.

If someone had told me I would be running my own private practice funded by my scary mafia boss husband only a year or so after finishing residency, I would have laughed comically years ago.

However, today, I run a non-profit gynecology clinic for new mamas and their babies. Whether they are in a tough financial situation, are afraid of being judged, or just want doctors who will listen to them for once, I am there, along with my other attendings, Dr. Emma and Dr. Abbie.

I was absolutely terrified in the beginning when Levi actually found me a space to work.

Not only did it fill me with excitement, but I was also filled with imposter syndrome, fear and anxiety. And when I shared my worries with my best friends, or rather my sisters, they immediately offered to be there by my side. I cried for hours on end when they told me they would come to New York to work with me.

We had no clients, no income, nothing at all, and instead of worrying about that, they were more excited to decorate their offices. I was also heavily shocked when Dr. Wyatt and Dr. Gordon attended our grand opening.

And when Dr. Woods, my OB/GYN rotation mentor during med school, applied for a part-time job with us as well, I almost fainted. Now, we were fully furnished with examination rooms, two surgical units, a small NICU, and a pharmacy as well.

I was forever in debt to my Levi and all he wanted in return was to put a baby,or rather a few, in me. When I was ready, of course. Now, in the house of our dreams, with the people I loved by my side, I couldn’t have asked for more.

And Levi, while he was still…dabblingin a few dangerous jobs and activities, he was getting more into business-related assignments. He took a step back from being the main aggressor, and since then, I could tell he was thriving as he opened more clubs and started more companies. Though his new venture alongside the guys brought in more money than I could ever imagine, he was busier these days. I would never complain, though. He made it clear it was for us.Everything he did was for us.

In the back of my mind, I always wondered if he truly had changed, but I know he did. He may still have old habits, but he was in control this time. He knew when to push boundaries and to set limits… and as a result, he hasn’t harmed me in any physical, emotional, or psychological way.

As he rubbed his hand over my stomach, I noticed his eyes darken slowly. Another thing I have to be slightly concerned about, however, is his growing need to protect and impregnate me.

Protect, I understand, but it’s almost as if he craves me to bear his children.At this rate, we’ll have our own mini-league soccer team,Abbie said to me a week or so ago, and I sighed internally. Something tells me he was actually serious when he said he wanted six or seven kids…

“Eat lunch on time today and space out your appointments,” he ordered, and I nodded as he ran his thumb over the huge diamond ring on my left hand.

“Love you…” I whispered, eager to hear him say it back, and he hummed, placing a sensual kiss on my lips before pulling away.

“I love you, my sweet Tesoro.”

Soon, I made my way to the bedroom and grabbed my light pink scrubs as I cooed at my little baby in my arms. He was fussing slightly, but I knew it was because he was sleepy... My precious boy.

Hearing the expected knock at my open door, I turned to see our babysitter, Katie. I smiled as she approached and cooed at little Silas. She was in her early twenties and was slowly getting back on her feet after leaving the foster care system.

She found our clinic when we’d first opened and was a victim of sexual abuse. She was afraid to even step foot inside and didn’t know if we’d listen to the story of her past. After getting her through therapy and regular check-ups, I realized she was very innocent at heart and felt broken due to her trauma.

And with the trust she’s put in me, I felt comfortable putting trust in her to watch our little Silas. When she’d have hard days, she would often call to let me know she wasn’t in the right state of mind to babysit, and instead of forcing her to watch him,either I, Abbie or Emma would spend the day with her if we could.

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