Page 107 of A Wolf in the Garden

I nod, tacking the final bedsheet above the window frame, creating a makeshift curtain spanning the wall to wall windows in the bedroom. It was too late to order in proper supplies when Ellie finally admitted to me what’s been bothering her the most during the nights — that she felt like the fae were watching her from out in the ocean, the moonlit view now more ominous than calming to her in her half-asleep state.

“It’s fine.” I step back, checking that there’s no gaps between the different fabrics. It’s lucky we bought so many spare sheets for Lacey and her kids, and that the pin tacks were easy enough to find in the box of miscellaneous stationary the previous owners had left in my office, something I’ve been meaning to organise for a while. Sure, there’ll be a few holes in the wall now, but it’s nothing that can’t be fixed, and it’s worth it if it’s the difference between Ellie feeling safe or exposed. “I only wish you’d told me sooner.”

“I didn’t want to be a pain.”

I turn to look at her. She’s sitting cross-legged on the bed, looking small on the huge mattress, wearing nothing but her lace panties. “You’re not being a pain.”

“You just used a whole pack of thumb tacks to stick a bunch of superhero and monster truck themed sheets across your bedroom; come on, admit it, that’s a pain-in-the-butt thing to do.” Her eyes grow moist, voice catching. “But I appreciate it so much,” she adds in a whisper, face twisting in a way that tells me she’s fighting back tears.

It breaks me to see her cry; it always has. “I didn’t use the whole pack,” I say, shaking the cardboard box, the rattle of a single thumbtack sounding overly loud in this space, and she snorts, rolling her eyes just as I’d hoped she would. I toss the box on my set of drawers and strip out of my clothes as she climbs under the sheets. “Lights out?”

“Lights out,” she confirms. “I’m drained.”

“Same.” I switch off the light, but don’t yet move towards the bed. As always, it’s fascinating to watch her in the dark, her pupils expanding to wide circles, eyes suddenly unfocused in their blind searching.

“Van?”

“I’m here.” The sheets rustle as I settle in beside her, pulling her to me, until her back is flush against my front, my hand cupping one of her soft breasts. She makes the perfect little spoon. “I have you,” I whisper against her hair, her sweet scent filling my nose. “I’m here.”

“I know.”

I listen to the waves crashing against the shore, debating whether to say anything else to her.

"Ellie."

"Hm?"

"I'm glad you told me that the window was bothering you, because it's okay to need to do something different in the wake of what happened… if it brings you a sense of security, there’s no harm in it. With everything that’s happened, you have to give yourself grace to do what you need to, so you can get through it one day at a time.”

She rolls over, pressing her face into my chest. "Is that what your therapist taught you?"

"No," I sigh. "Just… life."

I know she understands what I really mean, that it isn’t life, but death that has dictated so much of my last nine years. She tilts her head upwards, kissing my jaw, running her lips across my stubble.

“Ellie,” I whisper.

“Hm?” I can feel her limbs relaxing against me, her heart rate slowing as she falls asleep.

“It’s our room.”

“Mm?”

“The bedroom. It’s our bedroom, baby. It’s ours, not mine.”

“Mmm,” she hums in agreement, her nose pressed to my neck. “Love you,” she murmurs, a moment before I feel her fall asleep completely, both in the physical weight of her growing limp against me, and in the bond. The connection between our minds gently fades in a way that leaves the imprint of her love, making my chest ache with just howfullmy heart feels.

“Love you too, baby,” I tell her, hoping she’ll hear it in her sleep.

Motuwai Community Page

James Smith

Member

I just want to know why everyone keeps having their comments deleted??? Have admin not heard about Freedom of Speech??? There is such a thing as the Bill of Rights Act and under it we have a RIGHT to voice our concerns about behaviours that are threatening in nature to our community.

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