Page 51 of A Wolf in the Garden

“My ex wife is a human, did you know that?”

“You’ve mentioned it before.” I stare at his broad back, the fabric of his white tee strained around the bulk of his muscle.

“Aye, well. She knew I was an orc. I would never have hidden that from her, but it was always hard to judge the right time to tell someone. You had to know you could trust them completely, because the consequences of humans knowing were significant, back then. So I told her after some time together, and found a witch that could do the counter spell so she could see it for herself — that was Van’s mother, Bronte Livingston, who did the spell — and Màiri saw me and said she didnae care, she loved meregardless. Those were her words, and that should have been a red flag, aye, but I was too enamoured by her to care.”

“You never expected the Unravelling.”

“There was talk, from time to time. Weston — Van’s father — he always kept his ear to the ground. The shifters have a big network, all those alphas keep in contact with each other, even between realms… there’s something to be said about their pack mentality. But aye, I never really expected it to happen in my lifetime. It seemed like a far off concern; my family had lived in Scotland for four generations at that point. Four generations cut off from our clans in the First Realm, living and dying as humans; why would it be any different for me? So when it all happened…” He shrugs his huge shoulders. “There were many cracks in my marriage already. The Unravelling just busted a hole right through it.”

He packs away the last of the produce, turning to me when he’s done.

“Thank you for the veg, lass. And the flowers. But I dinnae want to hear another word from you about feeling guilty, alright? Like I said, I understand.”

He’s never told me anything about what contributed to the breakdown of his marriage before, and part of me wants to ask more, but I can tell now isn’t the time. Instead I tuck my hair behind my ears, making a show of it. “Well, here they are. Fae ears.”

His dark eyes search my face for a moment. “You look beautiful,” he says softly. “And for what it’s worth, I doubt anybody here on this island is going to care. And if they do, you can send them to me; let’s see if they’re brave enough to air their ignorant complaints to an eight foot tall green man.”

I wonder if this is what it’s like to have a dad. His arms come around me in a warm hug, huge hands patting my back as I blink back rogue tears. “Thanks, Cam.”

“Nae bother, lass. Now, tell me more about how you’ve been getting on. No more fae bothering you?”

“No more, so far.”

“Good. They’d be truly daft, were they to attack a wolf’s mate, but then again, crazier things have happened. We’re quite lucky to have that witch living on the island; makes it handy, at least, to get things sorted.”

That’s the second time someone has referred to me as Van’s mate. The word seems to hold a certain amount of significance that I’m clearly ignorant of, and I add it to the ever-growing list of otherworldly-related things that I have to ask Van about. I probably should be a little more embarrassed about the way Cam so casually mentions it.I bet orcs can smell all the sex scents too. For fuck’s sake, there’s no escaping it, is there?

I’m quiet as Cam makes us both a cup of tea. Handing me my drink, he gestures for me to follow him into the living room, where I curl up in one of his huge armchairs, sipping my hot earl grey.

“It’s the full moon tonight,” I say out loud, thinking about Van, sex, and the fact that he’s become noticeablyferalin the way he fucks me in the last twenty-four hours.

“Aye, I know.”

“I’m going to stay at Lost Moon tonight.” Is it weird that I’m mentioning this to Cam? Probably. This post-Unravelling world is still so confusing, and I keep feeling like I’m missing vital pieces of information. It doesn’t matter how much Van tells me, or how much I search on the internet; it’s like trying to look at the ocean floor when your head is above the water — even on the clearest days, everything you see is distorted, the slightest ripples shifting the picture, and you never really get a full idea of what it looks like unless you dive underneath. I feel that way about all of this non-human stuff; I don’t have the full picture. I’m scared I never will, but then again, I don’t know if I really want to, either.

“He asked you to?”

“He asked me if I wanted to see him as a werewolf. I said yes.” I definitely want to see Van in that form, to meet that wolf, the man-beast. I get a thrill every time I think about it, even if I am thoroughly confused by the way desire curls in my core at the idea of seeing him that way.

Cam gives me a look that I can’t quite interpret, until he says, “Did the lad warn you that he’ll likely want to lie with you, in that form? They’re horny bastards, the lot of them, those werewolves.”

I choke on my mouthful of tea, spluttering, liquid shooting out both my mouthandnose.“What?”

* * *

With my mind reeling from the impromptu sex-ed talk from Cam, it’s mid-afternoon by time I finally make my way to Lost Moon after stopping off at my place to pack a bag for the night, adding in a few extra items that I hadn’t initially thought to bring — a torch, some old-school woollen blankets I found in a thrift store, and baby wipes, since I’ve found those are always handy for cleaning things up after particularly messy sex. I cringe again at the memory of Cam’s voice saying the words“…considerable amounts of cum, even more than an orc.”

“He didn’t need to tell me that!” I cry to myself as I pull into Lost Moon’s road, horrified and horribly curious all at once. He was very clinical in his description of things, although he never saidhowhe has this knowledge, leaving me wondering how the hell he could be so certain of details.Stop that train of thought before you start thinking weird sexual things about Cam.

It’s Van that I want to think about. Van, who never mentioned anything about being sexual while he’s in that form. Hewouldhave said something, if he wanted me that way.Or maybe he’s too afraid to ask, too afraid he’ll scare me off.

He’s not going to scare me that easily. Every time I ask myself the question —am I really going to go there tonight, and have sex with a shifted werewolf?I find myself answeringyes, probably.The chemistry between Van and I is electric, and as strange as it is to admit it to myself, the idea of him fucking me as a werewolf turns me on. Even if part of my brain wants to deny it astoo weird, my pussy doesn’t lie, and the dull, needy ache to be fucked is ever present, the gusset of my freshly-changed panties already in danger of being wet through.

What will it feel like, to be on my hands and knees, and Van as a beast behind me?

If the nervous thrill I feel in my chest is anything to go by, I’ll love it.

Everyone says we need to adjust to the new normal, and thisisthe new normal.I’m not going to feel bad about it.It’s worse, in my opinion, to be like Cam’s ex and not accept these changes. This is who Van is. This is who he alwayswas, and he was never allowed to show me. I get to see all of it now, and that’s a good thing, an amazing thing.

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