Page 48 of Locke

“Do I fuckin’ look okay?”

“What happened?”

“I told her it was over,” I tell him. He curses under his breath when Hodge walks up and grabs a beer.

“You know I hated you for what you did to her.”

“You should hate me.”

“It’s not that simple, is it? You’ve been family for two fuckin’ years. Two years of takin’ this club to new places. Fuck, Locke. I can’t hate you, brother.”

“She can.”

“She doesn’t, though. I can hear as much comin’ out of that room up there,” he says, nodding toward the steps. He’s not wrong. We can all hear her screaming and crying, and it’s taking everything I have not to walk back up there and grab her in my arms.

“Doesn’t matter now.”

“Why not?”

“I called it off.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just what I said, Hodge. I called it all off. Isn’t that what everyone wanted?” I ask, looking at him. They didn’t want me with her. None of them did, and now it’s over. Hodge scrubs his hand over his face before taking a long pull from his beer. Then, he sets the bottle on the counter and walks off without another word. I watch him walk up the stairs and go toward Gunner’s office.

“Fuck,” Remy mumbles as we drink a little more. A few minutes later, Hodge comes back down and sits next to us.

“I was married once. We were young. I got on that shit like you did, and that was that. I did shit, said shit. Hell, I don’t even remember half of it, but she left me. So I fuckin’ get it, Locke. I get what you’re feelin’. I get what happened although I’m not condonin’ it. I just want you to know that you’re a good guy.” That’s when I see Kiki running down the stairs and out the side door. It takes everything in me not to go after her. Hodge sees the war in my eyes, too.

“It’s on you, brother,” he says as he looks to the door and back. I shake my head. I can’t do it. I can’t do this.

“This is all fucked up,” I grumble under my breath.

“Let’s go ride,” Remy suggests. I nod my head. I’m good with that. I need to clear my head anyway. I finish off my beer and toss the bottle in the trash before we head outside. I grab my helmet and slide it on before revving the engine and taking off. Remy isn’t far behind me, and neither is Hodge.

We ride like this for a long time, just letting go of everything else. I needed this. I needed the open road and the silence. I need to let go and just breathe.

We keep riding until we come to an old warehouse we used to use and pull off. I pull my helmet off and look over at the guys. They both smile back at me and I know that everything is going to be okay.

That’s when our phones ring. All at the same time. That’s never good.

“Yeah?” I answer first.

“Kiki with you?”

“What? No. We’re just out ridin’. She ran out the door before we left.”

“So she isn’t with you or Hodge?” Gunner asks.

“No. What’s goin’ on?”

“She took off again. I don’t know where she went,” he replies.

“You want us back or out lookin’?”

“I want you back until we figure out where she went.” I hang up and let the guys know what’s going on.

“Fuck, that girl is gonna be the death of me,” Hodge groans.

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