Page 14 of Bratva Knight

He gave me a small smile. “Okay. I’m just going to get the doctor now.” He handed me a tissue to wipe the gel away as he rolled the machine to the side.

“Wait, what did the ultrasound say? Is the baby okay?” I asked, sitting up.

“Unfortunately, I can’t discuss the results with you. I’m sorry. That’s for the doctor. I’ll just go get him and I’ll be back in a moment.”

“No,” I exclaimed, my anxiety spiralling. “You can’t do that. You have to tell me. He-he’s okay, isn’t he?”

Bill averted his eyes for the briefest second, the mask slipping away before he was able to put it back on his face. “I’ll go get the doctor.” He rushed out of the room, making it impossible for me to question him further.

Panic squeezed my chest to the point that I struggled to breathe. I didn’t know what was going on, but I’d seen enoughGrey’s Anatomyepisodes to know that, whatever it was, was bad. Tears welled in my eyes, blurring my vision. I took my phone out of my pocket, my hands trembling as I pulled up Nikolai’s number and hit CALL.

The phone rang three times before it got sent to voicemail.

He’d rejected the call.

No, please, Nikolai. Please. Answer.I called him again and again, each one going straight to voicemail.

He turned off his phone.

Oh, God, no.

He can’t do this to me. I need him.Weneed him.

Bill returned with Dr Spendel, their faces calm but eyes tense. My fear increased, heart pounding. Dr Spendel wore the traditional white lab coat, a stethoscope hanging around his neck. He had that comforting, older father vibe, the one that just put you at ease. He was slightly on the chubby side, with a thick head of hair and a kind smile.

“Miss Andreeva, I apologise for the wait. How are you doing?”

My first response usually would have been, “How the fuck do you think I’m doing?” But I held back from snapping at him so we could get on with it. I needed to know what was going on with my son, if he was okay.

Please be okay.

“Fine,” I replied, frowning as Bill pulled the ultrasound machine back over to the side of the bed.

Dr Spendel looked at me with sympathetic eyes. “I know from our earlier phone call that you’re worried, and you must be feeling incredibly anxious, so I won’t keep you waiting any longer. I’m just going to take a quick look and see what’s going on.”

I wanted to ask why he needed to look when Bill had only looked moments ago, but I said nothing as he lifted my shirt and squirted gel on my stomach.

Bill tried to fill the silence with mundane questions about me and my life. He was trying to distract me, but it wasn’t working. All of my focus was on Dr Spendel as he moved the ultrasound wand over my stomach, on the small crease in the middle of his bushy eyebrows that gradually got deeper and deeper.

“Well?” I asked, cutting Bill off mid-sentence.

Could he not read the bloody room? Why would I want to answer questions about what I like to do in my spare time when I was anxiously waiting to hear about what was going on with my son?

Dr Spendel cleared his throat and gave me a small smile. “Okay, we’re all done. Bill, if you could please take the machine and give us the room. Thank you.”

“Dr Spendel,” I pushed, irritated by the fact that neither of them were giving me an answer. “Is. The. Baby. Okay?”

Dr Spendel grabbed the chair and placed it next to me, sitting down. “Tatiana,” he exhaled, sadness layering his voice. “While conducting the ultrasound, I was unable to find a heartbeat. I am truly so sorry to have to tell you this, but your baby has passed away.”

My whole world came crashing down.

No. No. No. NO!

Tears gathered in my eyes. I wailed, wrapping my arms around my stomach. “No!” I screamed, crying hysterically. Time slowed as the worst, most agonising pain I’d ever experienced cut through me. My heart, my soul,everythinginside me died right there. With my son.

I felt myself get pulled down into a deep, dark void where I couldn’t hear a thing. I could see Dr Spendel talking, see his lips moving, but his words were coming through like static.

“Cord…wrapped around…nothing you could have done…not your fault…”

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