He sends me a sighing emoji followed by him agreeing to my request.

Mikhail: Fine. You can go out. I’ll ask two of my guards to accompany you. Be safe.

A part of me wants to tell him that I’m probably safer away from him. But that’s really not true, and it’s time I stopped lying to myself.

It’s another reason I need to get out of this house. My feelings are so complicated and entangled, I don’t know where to even begin understanding them.

CHAPTER 14

Mikhail

Orgasms are pretty nice.

They provide a certain form of clarity. You can’t know how you truly feel about someone until you’ve slept with them.

After last night with Anastasia, I’ve found some clarity of my own. Before then, I’d been thinking that this annoying feeling that plagues me was nothing more than momentary lust or a need for something I couldn’t have. I was wrong.

Now that I’ve had her, all I want is more. More of her in my bed, more of my being buried inside of her. I’m quickly coming to realize that Anastasia Vasiliev is a form of addiction—one that seems to be burrowing itself further into my skin the more I think about her.

I’ve been dealing with insomnia since I was ten years old. Ever since my mother passed away, I don’t think I’ve had more than a handful of hours of sleep at night. It’s become a burden I’ve learned to shoulder, but yesterday, I actually slept. For eight straight hours. And it was all thanks to her.

I fell asleep to her scent in my bed and the thought of her. Which is how I know this whole situation is being blown out of proportion.

Even now, there’s a smile on my face as I put my phone away after texting her. I’m acting sappy, which is unlike me. I’ve been in relationships with women in the past, but I’ve never felt the need to give them meaningful gifts like the camera I got Anastasia. But buying her a Dior bag wouldn’t have cut it. Not when I actually want her to like me.

My car rolls up in front of the building and I step through the sliding doors out of the lobby. For security purposes, I have to go everywhere with a convoy now that I’m Pakhan. I’m trying not to be as irritated with it as I usually would be.

At least one thing is still the same. When I enter the car, Jerome is in front of the wheel, wearing a basketball cap. I arch an eyebrow when he catches my eye through the rearview mirror, tipping his hat toward me.

“Hey, boss,” he greets with a goofy smile.

It’s times like this that I really question what I’m thinking, bringing him into a world like this.

“What are you wearing?”

“Oh, the hat? I went to a Bulls game two days ago,” he informs me.

“Really?” I drawl, tapping my fingers on my lap.

“Yes sir. It was quite fun. You should come with me some time.”

I don’t miss the sharp look the guard in the passenger seat shoots Jerome for his suggestion. I personally find it a little funny. If anything, my new position in the Bratva has made Jerome loosen up toward me further instead of the opposite. Which is insane.

“Jerome, the day I go with you to a basketball game is the day pigs fly,” I reply with a smirk.

He blanches and meets my eye again, seeming to remember where he is and who he’s speaking to.

“Of c-ou-rse. R-right, sir,” he stammers.

He quickly takes off the hat and the car ride regresses into silence until we arrive at our destination. Once we do, he rushes out of the car to open the door for me. I step out of it, buttoning up my suit as I do so and staring up at the imposing house in front of me.

The Vasiliev mansion was practically my home when I was a teenager. Mostly because my father couldn’t have cared less if I was in my actual home or not. I spent a lot of time with Anthony here. Made a lot of fond memories.

I should have known back then that I’d return to it as the owner. The mansion doesn’t just belong to the Vasilievs, it’s the seat of power of the Pakhan. And now it’s mine.

“Also, sir, I just wanted to congratulate you on your wedding yesterday,” Jerome states, breaking into my thoughts. “It was a nice ceremony.”

Being married doesn’t feel as different as I thought it would. In the back of my mind, there’s a constant reminder that I now have a new wife and new responsibilities, but it’s not the big change I thought it was going to be. Still, I make sure to thank Jerome before steeling myself for the day ahead.