Page 57 of The Secrets of Roan Island

“It doesn’t matter.” He crosses his arms over his chest. “The transition never works. They always die.”

The grandfather clock chimes. Each note drives home the passage of time. I mirror him and wrap my arms around myself.

“Do you understand now? If you stay here, my father will try to turn you. I’m certain that’s why he brought you here. He probably wants you dead because of your research but doesn’t want to waste a death. He’ll try to transform you first. That’s why I had to lock you up and tell him you’d already left.” He stops, and his eyes bore into mine. “I can’t let you die.”

“You could have let me go.”

“I tried!” he roars, his hand flying toward the door. “I did everything to get you to leave and still you stayed. Andnow you’re under my fucking skin!” He winces before his gaze hardens, and I get the impression he’s shoring himself up, shielding himself from what he’s about to say. “You have two choices. You can leave the island immediately. I’ll sneak you off to keep you safe. Or you can stay and help me, but I’ll have to lock you up to keep you hidden from my father until after Solstice.”

Before I know what’s happening, he draws me close, his nose running the length of my neck. “I can’t lose you,ta’ari.” His whisper is broken and desperate.

I shudder to think of all the choices he’s made, the things he’s done. But I don’t draw away from him. Cursing my inability to resist, I hold as still as a statue, knowing if I move I might end up clinging to him, offering him comfort he doesn’t deserve. Because right now, I can feel his pain. I can’t explain it, but I know how much all of this has hurt him. The depth of it is almost unbearable.

A throat clears from somewhere behind me, and I spin to see Jafeth leaning against the door, arms crossed, a lazy smile on his face. “You’ve been holding out on us, brother.”

Noah growls, low and deep. “It would be wise of you to leave and forget you saw us,brother.”

“Now, why would I do that?” Jafeth’s eyes follow the movement of the blanket as I tug it up, a pointless shield against a creature like him. “Noah told us you left with the rest of the new moon group. You should have seen how livid Hammish was.” His gaze travels to Noah. “How’s your arm feeling, brother? Your eye at least looks better.”

I study Noah’s face, for the first time realizing there’s a slight coloration around his right eye, green and putrid yellow. He told me how horrible Hammish could be, but it sinks in differently now. Noah took a beating for me. To keep me safe and off Hammish’s radar.

“Shemaiah’s still laid up in bed, if you’re wondering.” Jafeth’s tone is no longer playful. It’s cold, calculating. “Imagine my surprise at learning all of that was unnecessary.”

Noah silently puts himself between me and Jafeth.

Jafeth looks between us. “I don’t particularly care what this is about, but I don’t like taking a beating I didn’t choose.” He tugs on his clothing, straightening his already straight lapels. “Especially one that’s pointless, because Miss Rose is still here.”

“She’s leaving,” Noah says, voice sharp and hard.

“I’m not.” I’m as stunned at the decision as they are, but once it’s out of my mouth I know it’s the truth. I can’t leave. Not knowing that they’ll kill more women soon. If there’s any chance of stopping that, finding a solution, I need to stay.

Noah’s shock quickly morphs into a hard expression. “You can’t stay now that Jafeth knows. Hammish will find out.”

“I thought you said you were going to let me choose. That you wouldn’t be likehim.”

His scowl digs deep grooves in his face, making him look older, tougher, more foreboding. He stares at me, but doesn’t say anything. After a long pause his chin dips once.

“I’m going to help Noah with his research.” I push back my shoulders in defiance, setting my resolve. “You, Jafeth, are going to get my clothes from wherever Noah hid them, and then you’re going to keep your mouth shut.”

“Not a word of this to Father,” Noah says. “You know what’s at stake.”

“If we fail to find a solution, I’ll kill Hammish myself,” I say.

Noah scowls.

I turn and stare at him. “There’s no way I’m letting you harm a hair on another woman’s head.”

“You’re a little hellion.” Jafeth grins manically. “I can see why my brother likes you.”

That earns him a growl from Noah and a threatening, “Mine.”

“We’ve been over this,” I say. “I’m not a possession. And I’m most definitely not yours.”

No matter how much I felt like it last night.

I’m not staying for Noah. I’m staying for those women. That’s all.

But when Noah offers me a tentative, apologetic smile, I can’t help wondering if I’m lying to myself.

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