Page 51 of Scars and Burns

“Yes, I’ve targeted you. And just like you, I kill without mercy.”Thankfully he is already on his knees. They all end that way after I’ve made a few quick jabs. He’s looking up at me. Anger and venom in his eyes. I stare directly into his eyes as I bring my blade down, straight into his heart. This thrust spears through his body. The tip of my blade angled out the back of his torso. My mouth twitches slightly from the exertion. But my eyes never leave his. I watch as his eyes widen in shock. Holding my breath until I see the light completely fade from his soul. Only letting it out once I retract my blade and I hear his body slump to the ground.

Barely any sort of release.

* **

I’ve just exited the bathroom. By the time I had made my way back to the castle I was exhausted. Ready for a shower to wash away the dirt and blood that is caked on me.

I stare at myself in the mirror. Looking down at my Goddess mark in the middle of my sternum. Still black and vibrant.

Still complete.

It’s hidden well. Always opting for a high collared covering. The only ones to ever know about it are my Mother and Aemond, the random Shadowling that I saw a few times in the forest years ago.

There has been a change in my magic since unveiling itself. A powerful shift. It burns inside of me. I can feel it wanting to be set free.

I get some relief when I spar with Saphrina. Still providing her with magic lessons over the years.

Her mark has changed little. It is still on her wrist, vibrant and solid. Grown since she first received it. What was once a single crescent moon. Now sit alongside a half circle. Meant to represent the full moon of our Goddess but it has yet to create a 360 rotation.

She has progressed nicely with her magic abilities. Her white moonlight energy blasting objects and bringing them closer to her. She has yet to create physical objects with her magic though. She does not create ropes of energy that can be manipulated into grabbing or restricting things. Only waves emanating out of her. I worry it will not develop any further. Little has progressed in the last year.

I take this moment to reflect on my features a little bit more. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve attempted to change my appearance the way my Mother once did with her magic. More days than I care to admit I have wished and longed so desperately to alter myself. To be able to blend in and not have to disappear into the shadows. To catch one’s eye for my pleasing, delicate, and soft features rather than my jarring harsh coloring. To be like everyone else.

Alas, I have had no such power. It was hard for a long while after moving to the Middle Kingdom, even harder after my Mother died. But over these last four years I’ve grown in confidence. My magic is most unique and its versatility is unlike any I’ve heard or read about in our history. Although, eyes still linger and whispers still surround me, my power is undeniable. I do not shy away and take back stairwells to avoid interactions, unless I wish to do so. I walk the halls with my head held high. The potency of my presence in a room is stammering. Though no one else will ever see or believe it but I am just as my Mother once said. I am a rare star whose light cannot be matched, and I shall never dwindle again.

I’m sitting on my balcony, sipping my contraceptive tea that I consume after all of my sexual exploits to avoid unwanted pregnancies. I am already a bastard, unwanted in more ways than one, and I’ll be damned if I bring another displaced child into the world. It’s not that children have not crossed my mind but I am still only two and twenty. I have yet to even find someone willing to spend the rest of our lives together, but I also do not know if I am worthy enough to be a mother. My own seemed so remarkable and I am not sure I inherited any of those traits. My Mother had light, kindness, and grace to spare when raising a child. Her soul was pure and empathetic when mine has proven to be anything but.

I stare out to the forest, almost wishing I hadn’t come back, when I hear a knock at the door.

Still odd. No one ever comes to see me other than Saphrina and she wouldn’t come this hour.

I get up and walk over to the door. Finding a page waiting for me.

“Yes?”

“The King has requested your presence in his study.”

Great.

28

Aeron

We will ride out in two weeks. Princess Saphrina is of age and her official betrothal will be announced to Prince Proteus at their marriage celebration in the Middle Kingdom.

My Father received an invitation to join the celebration. Most likely not thinking he will actually attend. Clearly a power play to inform us of their alliance.

Too bad my Father will not be in attendance.

But I will.

My Father has not been a problem for quite awhile now. Ever since overpowering him and receiving my full Goddess mark his demeanor towards me has changed completely. He treats me as his son and heir once again. Including me in strategic military planning. Consulting me on his plans to overthrow the other realms. He still intends to demolish them. Still wants to spread the darkness throughout the three realms.

But he hasn’t mentioned me needing to kill Dinalia to prove my worth. Killing her and her Mother really was just a decoy. An excuse he used to mutilate my skin. To punish me. To break me. To push meto develop and defend myself enough to bear a full Goddess mark. That’s all he wanted, power.

I haven’t seen Dinalia since then. I came so close to letting go. So close to giving myself to her fully. But in the end I couldn’t. She touched my burns and I recoiled back into myself. I long for her touch now. To feel the soft caress of her lightly calloused hands. Heat rushes to my groin as I envision her pinned beneath me again. I still remember every moment of that interaction. Her pushed up against that tree while I tower over her. I often still wonder if she thinks about me as much as I think about her.

“She’s going to be there.” Aemond says, pulling me from my thoughts.

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