Page 41 of Scars and Burns

He smirks. Leaning forward, slapping his hand on my back. “First time for everything.”

I glare over at him. Smug bastard. Always telling me what I don’t want to hear but what I need to hear.

He leans back in his chair. “One more question.”

I sit up. Take a deep breath, leaning back into my chair. “What isit?”

“What do you see when your Father invades your mind with his magic?”

That was unexpected. I’ve never really thought about it before. Too enraptured by the pain.

“Nothing. I see nothing. Onlydarkness.”

24

Dinalia

“Saphrina, your magic is never going to develop if you don’t try” It’s barely light out and I already have Saphrina awake working on her magic lesson.

“Why does it have to be so early?” She whines. Shoulders slumped with her arms dangling at her sides.

I’m standing right across from her. Arms crossed over my chest. Trying to keep my composure. I’m not a teacher. I don’t have the patience for anyone else. I barely have it for myself.

Signing to myself. I have to rethink this. I can’t push her the way I pushed myself. She doesn’t have the drive.

At least not yet.

Doesn’t have anything to prove.

We need a place where she feels safe. Comfortable even. A place where her mind can be at peace.

I uncross my arms and walk over to her. Placing a hand on her shoulder. “Saphrina, is there a place you feel safe?”

She gives me a curious look. As if I’m crazy.

“Safe? What do you mean? Am I not safe here in the castle?”

“I don’t just mean physically safe. No one is going to attack you.At least not that I know of. And I will surely not attack you until you are ready to spar with magic. What I mean is a place you feel authentically yourself. A place you can be yourself.”

She scrunches her face. Moving her mouth to one side, thinking. “Um, no I don’t think so. I feel like myself all the time. Everywhere I go. I’ve never had to hide or shy away.”

I roll my eyes internally. Of course not. Even with the distress of her magic not coming to life. She has always still been able to fully be herself without judgment or question. Because she is the princess. She isn’t the judgee but the judger.

“What about you? Where did you practice your magic? Where do you feel like yourself?”

I remove my hand from her shoulder. Averting my gaze out the window of the drawing room. Walking towards it, looking out to the forest. I can feel her looking at me intently. Patiently waiting for my answer.

Finally I speak, “As you know Mother and I would hold my magic lessons in her garden.”

She huffs, “Okay, so that only answers half of it.”

She walks over to me. Joining me at my side. Looking out the window to the forest she’s never ventured into. She gives me a worried look before asking, “Dinalia, where do you feel like yourself?”

I stare straight ahead. Taking a deep breath and as flatly as I can, I say, “I practiced many places. Mother’s garden, my chambers, even the forest itself. That’s where I disappear for hours. I spend most of my time there alone and secluded.”

“Soooo??” She asks, still waiting for an answer. “Is it the forest? Is that where you feel like yourself?”

I look down, “The truth is Saphrina, I’ve never felt like myself because I don’t know who I am.”

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