Page 27 of Sin of the Saints

“Jesus of Nazareth… wasn’t he one of the Hebrews who brought the Old Testament, what you read to us in class?”

“Yes, but his death gave birth to the Church I currently work for, or at least I did until I decided to rebel against my calling.”

I sharply pull my hand away from him. “What do you mean, you decided? I just told you the heavy price we’ll have to pay. That’s not a decision you make in a heartbeat!”

“I want you, Belle. After tasting you I can’t back down, or deny what I feel. The Church can go to Hell for all I care.”

“You’re not thinking clearly,” I shake my head. He’s acting with an impulsivity that’s not at all like him.

“For the first time in my life, I don’t care. I want you; I want your chaos.”

I stand up and pace around the room, uneasy. My desire to hoard Bar for myself is taking a toll on him. He’s turning his back on his redemption. If he does that, he’ll be considered a traitor. God knows what they might do to him. And now he’s being punished by Libretto, that’s two fronts to fight on. Is it worth it? Those two fronts were fighting each other, and now we might turn their wrath upon us.

AmIworth it for him?

I can’t shake the thought that not only will his redemption be lost, everything else will be lost to him if he chooses me. Because the greatest sinner of all is within me, and she’ll never be worthy of salvation. Not her, and not anything she touches.

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it1.”

Hehad promised her the Garden of Eden, and more. It was an almost intolerable feeling for her to be there, and more than anything she wanted to consume it in the wrathful flames bubbling within her.

How dareHegive it to those hollow ones? How dareHe?

Lilith closes her eyes and focuses on the new abilities her rage has given her. Her body changes shape, her limbs meld into the center of her body and she whispers a torrent of curses that only increases the longer she stays in this place that has become her nightmare.

As she slithers through the thick green grass, she finds her goal: the Tree of Life, the Tree of Knowledge, the Tree that will punish her creator for his arrogance and pride.

She finds the woman lying on her back, the sun’s rays heating her pristine, delicate skin. The innocence dripping off her stirs in Lilith an unbearable nausea. She’ll makeHimcurse the woman, just asHehad cursed her. She won’t be satisfied until she sees her drowning in her condescending blood. She and her hollow man.

“Are the fruits of the Tree not suitable in your eyes?” Lilith whispers as she twines around the Tree.

“Suitable,” the woman smiles at the snake. Her fucking innocence is visible across her perfect face.

“Have you not yet tasted the gifts your God has given you?” The murmurs and the rustling of leaves cancel each other out.

“It is forbidden,” the woman whispers, looking around anxiously.

“If it is so forbidden,” Lilith tightens her coil around the trunk and rubs her head against the gleaming fruit beneath the morning glow, “why wouldHemake it so desirable? Here you are, a little taste, that’s all it takes for you to know that the whole world is in the palm of your hand. Creation of the world is not inHishands. Your womb will bring about the world, and life.”Lilith encourages the woman to come closer. With a trembling hand the woman plucks the fruit and stares at the serpent now positioned mere centimeters from her. “Taste it, and you’ll learn that forbidden things taste the sweetest,” Lilith rasps, drawing out her words.

The woman lifts the fruit to her mouth, and her hesitation vanishes the moment she bites into it and gasps with glee. A sublime feeling envelops her, and unlike what she’d thought, she’s never felt closer to her creator.Hesanctifies me, the woman thinks with a satisfied smile.

“Go, call your man, discover with him that boundaries are meant to be crossed. Laws are made to be broken. And sins? Sins have flavors that can soar to the heavens, while morality is a burden that will weigh you down.”

Elated, the woman runs to seal her fate and her man’s. Forever shall she be condemned to pay for her sins in blood.

And Lilith the bloodthirsty? She is damned to that thirst, and it will be her curse. And indeed, mankind was made in God’s image. Eve sorrowfully brought sons into the world. Whereas Lilith, who had also succumbed to temptation and eaten the forbidden fruit, sorrowfully brought forth daughters.

“It’s my choice!” Bar stands tall right in front of me, despite his blindness. He grips my shoulders and shakes me as though trying to force his twisted logic into me. “You don’t understand.” He laughs like a maniac. “This isn’t about a choice between sin and redemption, to hell with all that. I don’t give a fuck.” The bell chimes and sends currents of pain through my body, but it’s nothing compared to the pain Bar is giving me.

“That’s not possible! You’ve been raised your whole life for a specific purpose, and…”

He cuts me off and his grip on my shoulders tightens. “It’s you, Belle! My choice will always be you. To hell with the consequences. I don’t want to find the straight path, I want to break all the rules with you, to shatter them into a thousand hellish pieces, I want to get lost with you and in you. My redemption will be burning in the underworld with you!” He roars, and the aura around him almost blinds me as well as it erupts from within him.

“Bar, what’s happening?” I start trembling and my body almost ignites just by being near him and his intense determination.

“This is me, offering you my heart, my body, my fucking soul. Take it. Take me.”

I can’t answer as he closes the gap between us and crushes his lips to mine.

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