Page 81 of If Tomorrow Never Comes

“Pretending to die andactually dyingare two very different things.” She blows out the smoke harshly, pinching the bridge of her nose and taking a seat on a lounge chair near the gas fire pit.

I light up the cigar I have in my pocket before taking a seat on the arm of her chair and continue. “Killian and I made a tough call. His best cardiothoracic surgeon administered a drug called adenosine. The drug has the ability to slow your heart until it stops. If lucky—only temporarily, with no other issues arising from it.”

“You did NOT.” Madison aggressively extinguishes her cigarette in the ashtray then spins her body around, shooting me a death glare.Hell, I cheated death a few times in my life, but now I’m not so sure I’ll survive her wrath.

“No one planned on the severe weather knocking the power out, or forthe generators to go down. Killian and Selena had gone to bed, and you were still sound asleep on my chest. That’s when I had Dr. Angosta inject me. It was fucking painful. The worst pain I’ve ever experienced. Watching your peaceful face and knowing you were safe in my arms is what helped me through it. Asystole was only supposed to last a few seconds and I would have been back. Of course, I have shit fucking luck, and reviving me wasn’t an easy task. Liam wasn’t even supposed to be there, but he had woken up at the perfect time. Killian had him rush in to grab you, knowing you’d need him during this. You both witnessed my ‘death’ as the doctors raced to get me back. It had to be real, sweetheart. All the staff, the nurses, the doctors who would later be interviewed would all say the same thing. To the world—the most dangerous criminal of the underworld had died of a cardiac episode after surgery. A surgery performed in New York where his new wife resides. There was supposed to be medical proof showing all of this, but of course the power went out. Word of mouth and hand written chart notes did the job. Authorities from both countries fell for it. Believing wedding fireworks caused the explosion and that I had died post surgery. With a little bit of outside help and Killian’s hacker Seb, the case was closed. My name was now clear and so was yours. All my assets went to you and my sister.”

Madison’s lips hang open in the shape of an O. She’s stunned to silence for a few moments. “So you…what? Rose from the dead after Liam took me out of there?”

“Precisely.”

She stands abruptly and gets into my face, wafting the thick cloud of smoke obscuring her vision of me with her hand.

“How. Fucking. Dare you.” She jabs her finger into my chest. “We spread your ashes! Oh God, whose ashes were those?!” Her hands come up and open wide. “Did you know that I lost my boyfriend when I was in college? That he died suddenly, and that it fucking wrecked me? Did you know what this lie would do to me?”

Deep within my chest, my heart skips a beat.Shit.

“No, I didn’t.”

“Of course you didn’t,” she lets out a sardonic laugh. “How could you? You don’t know anything about me.” She laughs again but more so to herself. “I’m so fucking stupid. This whole time, I actually thought I meant something to you. But I didn’t. It was all about the sex. And I was just the perfect chess piece in your little game.”

“Madison. I did this so that your name wouldn’t be dragged all around the world and the underworld. That your attachment to me didn’t bring you down with me.” I reach for her hand again, but she snatches it back out of my grip.

“No. You don’t get to lie to the person you claim to love. You don’t put her through hell to clear your name. Even if it was to clear my name as well, you could have told me. I would have kept your secret. I would have faked the grief. We could have been together all these months.” Her voice raises an octave. “Jesus, Diego. All these elaborate plans. These elaborate lies. You really didn’t learn the first time, did you? How keeping people out of your plans could be detrimental? No, not detrimental.Catastrophic?”

She spins on her heel to face Liam. “Andyou. Her manicured index finger points his way. You’re telling me the truth, that youjustfound out? Killian didn’t tell you?”

His eyes fill with sadness and frustration. “No. He didn’t, love. You aren’t the only one who has a distant relationship with Killian.Clearlymy brother has his own agenda.” His head snaps back and he looks up at the cloudy sky threatening to snow on us. Releasing a sigh and focusing on her again, he says, “I can’t fucking believe this. Trust me, baby. I would have told you, had I known. I wouldn’t have kept this from you, knowing the grief you were going through and the similarities of your past.”

Madison takes it all in, seemingly satisfied with his response.

“Your sister is in the hospital delivering your nephew—by the way.” She faces me again, her voice void of any emotion. “Oh, but I’m sure you already knew that—consideringtheyknow you’re alive.”

“I didn’t know that, but thank you for telling me. Listen, Madison, there’s a lot more to discuss. I know it’s a lot to take in. I did this to make sure your marriage to me didn’t involve you with the law and that you would be set for life. One day in the future when the dust settled, I planned on coming back to rule my syndicate. Antonio and Selena did a good job running it with me as an absentee leader. I knew taking this would be a huge risk. But if I did come back to you, you’d be pissed but you’d be safe. And—I knew that if you couldn’t possibly stand me after all this, you were free to fly. ‘Til death do us part, right baby?”

With a scoff, she stands and walks towards the glass sliding doors. “We are done here. If you need anything, contact the lawyer. Don’t call me, don’t try and find me, don’t send me anything. You wanted me to fly, and that’s what I am going to do. You wanted to become a ghost to me. And now you are. Goodbye, Diego.”

I sit on the edge of the chair, stunned to silence. I wasn’t expecting that from her, but I deserve it. Christ, I basically trained her to do this. My heart throbs worse than it did the night I died.

This is fucking heartbreak.

Liam catches up with her and the two of them disappear behind the doors, Madison taking what’s left of my heart with her.

Fly, Mariposita.

Fly.

Her body shakeswith a mixture of being chilly in the New York air and all that just went down. I’m shocked. Never could I have prepared for what just unfolded. My poor girl, she’s trembling so severely, I act on instinct and pull her to me. She doesn’t resist, just wraps her arms around me and lowers her face to my shirt.

“This is so fucked up. How could they all do this to me?”

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I think we need to talk to Killian. And unfortunately, right now isn’t ideal. I promise you tomorrow we will speak to him. I won’t let Diego near you again.” I press a kiss to her temple. “Come on, I’ll take you to my room. I’m sure you need some time to digest all of this.”

Her head lifts off my chest and her teary eyes meet mine. “I need Lexi. Can you have her meet me in there, please?” I shouldn’t be hurt by her need for her best friend, but for some reason I am.

It feels like a dismissal.

Glancing down at my watch, I see that there is less than an hour until midnight. I had a sweet plan for Madison and I.Except, that all went to shit.She won’t be interested in anything even remotely romantic now.

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