Page 43 of The Pretty Psycho

I didn’t know much about people and normal human interactions, but this didn’t seem like a group that feared Adrian. I had no idea what Jax and Dante were talking about, but it didn’t make sense. Not even a little bit.

Jax and Dante were walking ahead of us, Dimitri and Arseniy following at our pace, scanning the crowd with watchful eyes. I couldn't forget that every single one of these people was a professional killer, and friends or not, they could destroy us within seconds if they tried to.

I didn't exactly feel comfortable having all of them here, especially when I was still recovering and my full strength would only come back gradually, but I had Adrian. As fucked up as it sounded, considering that we were at each other's necks most of the time since I arrived at the Academy, I still knew I had him. He held my hand in an almost painful grip, as if he worried I would disappear if he didn't hold on to me.

I went through hell with Tyler, but I was slowly starting to see what my disappearance had done to Adrian as well. He didn't want to burden me, that much was obvious, but a fear that wasn't there before was now ever-present in his eyes. I had a feeling it had nothing to do with his father and an impending attack, but specifically with me.

I had no idea what love was or what it was like caring this much for another human being, but if it was anything close to what I was starting to feel for him, then I was good with it. I kinda liked it and I didn't want to fight it. I’d spent so much of my life fighting, constantly being on the lookout, waiting for any new drama to unfold and for the next mission, and I didn't want to fight anymore.

I was tired of the constant darkness in this life. I was tired of my own skepticism, and while a part of me still said that we couldn't trust him, that Adrian still posed a danger to not only my physical health but my mental one, the other part of me, the part that needed normalcy as much as possible, was telling me to embrace this, whatever this was. I didn't want to fight him, not right now, and if he wanted to take care of me, then I would let him.

God knew I didn't have enough people watching out for me, plus with all these new developments, my future was up in the air.

Everything was up in the air.

My brain was still processing the fact that I had a brother. A brother who wanted me in his life and wasn't trying to kill me. He wasn't looking to eliminate me, but to help me, to get to know me and protect me from the life that almost destroyed him. There were demons in Arseniy's eyes I was already familiar with and I'd be lying if I said it didn't bother me that both of us had fucked-up childhoods. He had hoped I had the normalcy he lacked throughout his life, and I could see the disappointmentthat washed over him when I told him little bits and pieces about The Schatten back in the hospital.

He didn't ask about Adrian, he didn't push, he didn't try to tell me what to do, which I appreciated more than he could imagine.

I just didn't know what to do with Adrian.

He still lied to me.

He still had to explain everything to me.

His words were one thing and this attention he was showering me with another, but his actions… We will see, I guess. Only time would tell if what he said was true or a lie. Only time would tell if this insane attraction I felt toward him was only here because I so desperately wanted to have someone in my life, or because our souls were truly meant for each other.

In a way, he must have seen my reluctance to stay. If he hadn't he wouldn't have taken me into his cabin, and he wouldn't be holding my hand now as if his life depended on it. He kept glancing down at me, those dark brows pulling down every time he looked at me, every time his eyes landed on the ugly cut on my cheek.

My physical wounds would heal, but it was those soul-deep slashes that would stay open for much, much longer, and I had no idea how to feel about that. Not thinking about it helped, though I knew I was avoiding confronting those parts of me that felt broken after my kidnapping. I knew I was deliberately focusing on this war we had coming after us, because it meant not thinking about the fact that every time I moved and every time I looked into the mirror, all I could think about was Tyler and his depraved eyes staring at me.

I shook my head as those memories threatened to resurface, ignoring the worried look on Adrian's face as we kept walking down the stairs toward the parked cars where several men and women gathered, all of their eyes firmly plastered to us.

"Are you okay?" Adrian murmured. Arseniy's head snapped toward us as if he could hear him, narrowing his eyes when he saw the look on my face. I knew he wouldn't step in and try to smother me with anything I wasn't ready for, but the way his hands twitched and his eyes kept following my movements, I knew he wouldn't be able to stay away for much longer. Plus, Adrian was already slowing down until we stopped altogether, his attention firmly on me. "Vega?"

Dimitri and Arseniy stopped as well, shy a couple of feet away from us, and I hated seeing the looks on their faces and the way their eyes kept bouncing from Adrian to me and the other way around.

"I'm fine," I gritted out, unable to meet Adrian's eyes, because I knew he wouldn't believe a word I was saying. My right hand throbbed even after I took the painkillers that Adrian had left for me. My ribs were sore and the pounding headache could no longer be ignored. But I wanted to be here. I refused to be treated as a child, or even worse, as a victim, while the guys ran around trying to save the world.

No, fuck that. I wasn't going to confine myself to one room and lick my wounds. If I did that I knew my sanity would be shot to shit, and I had to hold on to what little of it I had left.

"Bambi," he grumbled. "Don't lie to me." This time I looked up at him, hating, absolutely fucking hating the look in his eyes.

I liked it more when he looked at me with contempt and a little bit of hatred than this pity I was seeing there. I didn't want him to worry I would fall apart, because I wouldn't. I was stronger than the monsters trying to bring me down. I was stronger than Tyler, The Schatten, and Adrian's fucking father. I was stronger than all of them combined, and fuck him for thinking I would break just because I was in pain.

I started pulling my hand out of his grip, when he tightened his hold on me, moving so he was standing right in front of me, shielding me from the crowd.

"Let me go, Adrian," I mumbled, ready to just get this shit over with. "Adrian!" I hissed, but the fucker just kept looking at me as his eyes filled with anger.

"You don't run from me, Bambi," he pushed out. "You don't ever run from me."

"I'm not running," I huffed, trying to break free, but the stubborn man in front of me obviously had no idea how to read signs because he wasn't letting go. "Please let me go."

"Never," he bit out, taking a deep breath before lowering his head until his lips came close to my ear. "But please tell me what’s wrong. I’m here for you. You know I’m here."

I-I hated this. I hated the way he talked to me, and it wasn’t even because he said something wrong. It was… It was me.

It was all me.