Page 87 of My Irresistible Enemy

“Aiden?” There was a knock on my bedroom door, followed by Nolan’s voice. “Are you okay?”

I held my breath, hoping he’d go away. I didn’t want to have to explain this.

“Aiden, Iknowyou’re in there, I just heard you. Look, I was coming to ask if you wanted to grab dinner later, and you can say no, but will you at least open the door and let me know you didn’t just electrocute yourself?”

I frowned. That seemed suspiciously nice of him.

“Look, you realize it gets more suspicious the longer you’re silent, right?” he said. “I’m really working on the whole not-barging-in-on-you thing, but this isn’t the way to convince me you’re okay, this is the way to convince me you just lost a dildo inside your ass and are bleeding internally.”

I sighed and opened the door, glaring at him. “Give me a little credit. I know the rules of dildo safety. Flared base, always keep a firm grip on the end.”

Nolan arched an eyebrow. “I thought you said you’ve never had a grip on anything in your life?”

I laughed, but it was watery and weak, and he gave me a concerned look.

“Hey, come on. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“That’s obviously a lie.”

“Well, maybe I’m lying because I don’t want to tell you.” I turned and walked to the window, staring out through the glass.

I heard Nolan shut the door behind me, felt him approach. I couldn’t decide if I was relieved or annoyed. I couldn’t handle another rejection right now. Even one from Nolan, who I knew better than to care about.

“You don’t have to tell me that something’s wrong for me to see that it’s true.” His voice was gentle. “And you don’t have to tell mewhat’swrong if you don’t want to. I just want to know that you’re okay.”

I watched the low-slanting sunlight play on the leaves outside my window, thinking about my parents. They had never asked me questions like that. They’d always acted like my emotions were too much.

A shudder rolled through my body, and I hugged my arms around myself. “It’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid if it bothers you,” Nolan said.

“Excuse you. Lots of stupid things bother me. You don’t know my life.”

“No, but I know you well enough to know that if you’re actually tryingnotto talk about something, it’s gotta be serious.” He studied me. “Come on, what are fake boyfriends for if not this?”

His words caught me off guard. Sometimes I forgot that was what we were. That the only reason we knew each other at all was because of this ruse. And here I was, considering telling him everything. When had things stopped feeling fake for me?

I couldn’t figure it out, which only made the tears at the backs of my eyes press harder, and the next thing I knew, Nolan was wrapping his arms around me. I buried my face in his chest as sobs racked my body. He smelled like mint and basil and sunshine. He smelled like home.

Why couldn’t I freeze time and just stay here forever, right in this moment? No consequences. No decisions. No feelings.

“It’s okay,” he murmured, rubbing my back. “It’s okay.”

It was the gentlest thing any guy had ever said to me, the sweetest I’d ever been treated, and we weren’t even together. Why was that? Why couldn’t I make it work? Why couldn’t I like someone who actually liked me back, find someone to want me for real, instead of just faking it?

“Do you want to talk about it?” Nolan asked after a minute.

I hiccupped. I didn’t really want to talk. But Nolan’s arms felt too good. I could get used to this, if I wasn’t careful. It was better to remind myself that it wasn’t real.

I pulled away and found my phone. Pulled up HungTopXL’s message and handed it to Nolan. His eyebrows rose as he read it, and finally, he looked at me.

“Someone sent you this?”

I nodded.

“On your CamFans account?”

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