Page 62 of My First Time Fling

Mark was running straight towards me.

Not just towards me.Intome. He came across the finish line at such a high speed that he ran into me before he could stop himself. All I could do was brace for impact.

I grabbed his shoulders—I wasn’t sure if I was trying to keep myself from falling over, or him—and we stumbled backwards, barely staying upright. Other runners streamed around us, but I was barely conscious of them. All I could see was Mark, right there with me, his eyes shining.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, hope and dread mingled in my stomach, my lungs tight with anticipation instead of exertion now. “What are you—”

“I’m sorry, Jesse. I am so, so sorry.” Mark brought his hands to either side of my face, his eyes holding mine, his chest heaving. “I never should have said what I said, or broken up with you. It was stupid, it was all so stupid. I didn’t want to break up with you, I was just scared, and I got freaked out, and I thought it would be better for both of us if I walked away. But it’s not. It’s worse, it’s so much worse. It’s fucking terrible, actually, because I miss you, and I want you, and I hate that I hurt you, and I—I love you, Jess. I love you, and I can’t stand being broken up, and I’m so sorry, and I know you might not feel the same, but please, you have to at least let me tell you how much I—”

I cut him off with a kiss.

Mark didn’t move at first. I could feel his shock in the stillness of his posture, the way his breath caught as my lips hit his, but I just kissed him harder, wrapping my arms around his neck. There weren’t words for what I was feeling, so the kiss would have to do.

How could I express the overwhelming relief I felt? The release that had me wanting to cry? The elation that the nightmare of the past week was over, and that Mark wanted me, wanted to be with me, and he’d missed me too, and he was here, right here with me, and not going anywhere?

The English language couldn’t do it justice, so I just kissed him, letting all those feelings crash over me at once. I kissed him and kissed him, and soon he was kissing me back, the two of us staggering around like drunken idiots as runners continued to cross the finish line five feet away. I knew we should move to the side and make room, but I didn’t want to stop kissing him long enough to figure out which direction to move—until a thought occurred to me.

I pulled back and smiled at the confused joy I saw in Mark’s eyes. “I love you too,” I told him. “In case that wasn’t clear. It’s going to take a while before my brain can form full sentences again, but that much, at least, I wanted to say before we went any further.”

And then his lips were on mine again, soft and sweet, his tongue tangling with mine, his hands on my cheek and my back. Somewhere, I thought I heard a flashbulb go off but I didn’t care. All that mattered was here, now, Mark. Everything was going to be okay again, if he was here with me.

Finally, Mark broke the kiss, though his hands stayed glued to my body. “I hate to say this,” he said, grimacing, “because I never want to stop kissing you, but could we go somewhere where we could sit down and make out? I got to the race after it started, and I was trying to catch up to you, and I think I just ran the fastest marathon of my life.”

“You sweet idiot,” I laughed. “Why didn’t you just meet me at the finish line?”

Mark blushed. “I should have. Brooklyn told me to, actually. But I wasn’t thinking clearly. Obviously. This past week hasn’t been a great demonstration of my thinking capabilities, to be honest. The only thing I knew for certain was that I had to find you.”

“You saw Brooklyn?” I asked, tilting my head to the side.

“I did. And he gave me a talking to.”

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry. He shouldn’t have—”

“Yes, he should have,” Mark interrupted. “I deserved it.”

“But he doesn’t know—I mean, I didn’t tell him everything you told me. I didn’t know if you’d be comfortable with me telling him about, well, you know. The point is, he’s only heard my side of the story.”

“And there’ll be plenty of time to tell him my side later,” Mark said. “But for now…”

“Come on.” I took his hand. That, at least, I was never letting go of. “Let’s go get you some water.”

I don’t know what happened for the next hour. How we got our stuff back from the bag drop. How we got home. I think we might have seen Brooklyn somewhere in there, but I might have just imagined it.

I couldn’t pay attention to anything except Mark. Having him here with me again. Maybe I didn’t need a boyfriend to complete me, but it sure felt good to have him by my side.

It sounded like he’d had an even worse week than I had, which just made me want to hug him. Though I had to laugh when he told me he thought I’d gotten back together with Tanner. That was just crazy. But then again, I knew what it was like to feel a little crazy over someone you loved.

We were just walking in the door to my house when my phone buzzed, alerting me of some new notification. I hit ignore without looking at it, but Mark caught my wrist.

“Check it,” he said. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”

“It can wait.” It could, but I couldn’t. Not now that I had Mark back, and my bedroom just one flight of stairs away…

“Yeah, but this whole mess could have been avoided—well, at least shortened—if I’d just answered your texts this week. For which I really am sorry, in case I haven’t said that enough yet. But seriously, just check your phone. What if it’s from your family or something?”

I sighed. I did love Mark, but he was being annoyingly responsible when all I wanted was to engage in deviance and debauchery. That was something we were going to have to work on.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” I told him. “Unless this turns out to be something that prevents me from taking you upstairs and ravishing you immediately. In that case, you’ll need to beg my forgiveness on hands and knees.”

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