Page 23 of My First Time Fling

“That sounds amazing.” Mark sighed. “There’s got to be some way to work it out. You know, if you got it somehow, I could help you get it in shape. It can’t be any worse than what I’m doing at Gigi’s house.”

I wasn’t so sure about that. I knew Mark was helping his grandmother out, but the Sea Glass needed some serious TLC—and probably a licensed contractor. Still, it was a nice thought.

I smiled as we ran on. It was fun to imagine Mark helping me get the bed and breakfast into shape, even if it was just a pipe dream. But it probably wasn’t a good idea to fantasize about that future too much.

I was glad Mark still wanted to be my friend, but I’d have to work hard to keep myself from wanting more.

8

Mark

Icouldn’t stop thinking about Jesse.

I rolled over in bed, flopping onto my back, and stared at the dark ceiling above me. I couldn’t turn my mind off, couldn’t stop running over our conversation from earlier today.

He’d said we should pretend the kiss never happened. I should have been happy with that, right? Wasn’t it the best possible solution? It meant I got to keep him as a friend and that I didn’t have to end up hurting him like I knew I would.

I should have been happy. So why wasn’t I?

Probably because deep down, I knew that I wanted Jesse to like me. That, frankly, I had thought that he did. And it hurt to hear that he didn’t. All the things I was afraid of making him feel, I now felt myself.

Just fucking great.

The whole thing was ridiculous. I hadn’t hurt Jesse, and he didn’t want to date me. That was the outcome I wanted. And now that I had it, I wished it were different.

I turned onto my side again, readjusting the pillow under my head. Maybe I should have told Jesse the truth. Well, most of it, anyway. Maybe I should have opened up. But how could I do that, now? It was too late. And it would be pointless.

Almost as pointless as lying in bed, since I clearly wasn’t going to fall asleep anytime soon. I sighed, glancing at the clock. 11:00 p.m. wasn’t that late, but I’d hoped that the long run with Jesse earlier today would have exhausted me enough that I wouldn’t have trouble sleeping. So much for that idea. I supposed I should be grateful I wasn’t having nightmares right now.

I hauled myself out of bed and threw a T-shirt on over my boxers before heading downstairs. I’d been working in the kitchen all week, ripping out the old appliances and cabinets and installing new ones. I’d just finished the plumbing earlier this afternoon and while I still needed to install some built-in shelving by the door, doing that now would make enough noise to wake Gigi up.

But there was always painting to do, and that didn’t make much noise at all. I opened the windows and the back door, laid out the drop cloth, and got to work. And as soon as I picked up the brush, I felt calmer. Something about having tools in my hands, working on a practical task, made the world seem a bit more manageable.

I lost myself in the rhythm—and possibly the paint fumes—and started daydreaming about how fun it would be to be doing this with Jesse. Or for Jesse. I wished I could see that bed and breakfast on the coast, wished there were something I could do to help. But I didn’t have money. I didn’t even have a real job.

My phone rang, shattering the spell the night had cast on me, and I jumped. I set the brush down and walked over to where I’d left it in the hall, worrying that it was one of my parents. Who else would be calling at this hour?

But it wasn’t my parents, or anyone from home. It was Jesse. Confused, I picked it up and walked back to the kitchen so I wouldn’t disturb Gigi.

“Hey Jess, what’s up?” I asked, wandering towards the back door. The night was a little cooler than the day had been, but summer in Savannah was never going to get properly cold. Hell, it hadn’t even dipped below seventy degrees the whole time I’d been here. Still, I liked the way the breeze kissed my skin.

“Mark? Did I wake you up?”

“No, not at all. I was up painting, actually. What’s going on?”

“Okay, I’m really sorry to ask you this, but I need a huge favor. You know how I live in a group house with like, sixty million frat guys?”

“Yeah?” I did know that. I’d seen a few of them one time when I’d met Jesse for a run at his house. They’d reminded me of what I thought Gabe might have been like when he was twenty-two, and I’d tried to cut them some slack. But I knew they drove Jesse crazy.

“Well, apparently they decided that last night’s party wasn’t enough and they’re throwing another one tonight. And I just—I’m going to crack if I don’t get some sleep tonight. I have to get up at four a.m. to take the early shift at the cafe and I can’t keep scraping by on such little sleep and I just—”

“Jess, Jess, it’s fine,” I said, interrupting him. “Really, it’s fine. You can crash here.”

“Really? You don’t mind? I would have called Brooklyn, but he has to get up only a few hours after me, and I didn’t want to bother him, and—”

“Really. It’s not a problem at all. Gigi’s house has enough beds to sleep an army. Not a big deal.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Jesse said.

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