Page 71 of Dire Straights

“Maybe,” Aspen answered. “If not, we can just text him to get on or come over here. If he isn’t busy with Arie or anything.”

But before I could even pull up my friends list in the game, my phone started ringing. It was Maddy.

“Hey,” I answered. “How did-”

“I need to talk to you right now,” he cut me off. He sounded slightly out of breath, like he was really worked up. “Where are you?”

“I’m just in my room with Aspen,” I said, surprised. “Is everything okay?”

“No,” he said, definitively. “Definitely fucking not. I’m heading up, so I’ll see you in a minute.” The call ended with a little beep and I pulled my phone from my ear, blinking at it.

“Everything good?” Aspen wondered.

“Uh, no,” I said. “He sounds really upset.” The talk with the coach seemed to have gone pretty badly. “He’s coming over to vent.”

“Got it,” he said, closing his laptop. “We can play some other time.”

It only took another couple of minutes before we heard knocking on the door. When I called for him to come in, it swung open to reveal Maddy, looking visibly livid. His chest was heaving with exertion and probably adrenaline, his fists clenched at his sides.

“I am so fucking pissed,” he said, needlessly. That much was obvious to anyone in a 5-mile radius, probably.

“I’m just, uh, going to find something else to do,” Aspen piped up, after pulling on a shirt. He slunk over to the door,eyebrows raised. “See you, Maddox,” he said, slipping past him out into the hall.

“See you,” Maddy answered, giving him a brief glance before coming in the rest of the way and closing our door behind him.

Standing up from my seat, I instantly stood and ushered him over to my bed so we could sit together and talk. My poor little emotional firecracker. I wished I could shield him from all the elements of the world that made him so upset.

“What happened?” I asked, raising my hand to rub over his back. To my surprise, he leaned his body into mine, pressing his face into my shoulder. Wrapping my arms around him, I laid my cheek on the top of his soft hair. It was definitely not the time to bring up the boyfriend discussion, or any other concern I might have had. All of that could wait.

He inhaled deeply, burrowing more snugly into my body, and then started talking.

MADDOX

THE WALK DOWNto the pool and into Coach Larson’s office was a special kind of torture, but I’d avoided my problems long enough. It was time to face the music. And maybe Ren’s blind optimism about explaining my feelings would actually do me some good. Being open and honest about how I felt with him had only done good things for my life, so maybe it would apply here too?

I passed by Garrison, Ahmet, and O’Conner practicing in the pool, staring straight ahead to avoid eye contact with any of them. I didn’t know if they saw me or not, but I knew they’d probably shit-talked me the entire trip. That was somewhat fair, since I shit-talked them to my friends on a semi-regular basis, too.

As I made my way to the other end of the huge room to where his office was located, I noted the other handful of guys on the team that didn’t associate with the moron triplets much. Maybe I should have just leaned into hanging out with them more instead of trying to force civility with three guys I couldn’t stand. But was it too late? Had O’Conner already spread rumors about me that couldn’t be taken back now?

Peering in through the glass panel, I saw Coach Larson at his desk, filling out paperwork. I rapped my knuckles on the door, and he waved me in.

“Alright, Holmes,” he greeted me. His tone wasn’t exactly friendly, but it wasn’t exactly hateful either. “You said you have a reason for missing the trip. I want to hear it.”

I took a deep breath, steeling myself. I’d rehearsed this conversation in my head a lot, so I knew exactly what I wanted to say.

“I thought about what you said, about me not bonding with the team, and I want to explain myself and hopefully give you a better understanding of why I haven’t been willing to do that.”

“Alright.”

“Certain members of the team exhibit a lot of behavior that I don’t… Agree with,” I decided on the word. I thought about how in the beginning I’d ignored all their bullshit about Arie and disrespecting girls all the time. It wasn’t right, and I shouldn’t have to listen to shit like that. “And even besides that, I’ve had other team members verbally attack me or go out of their way to insult me.”

“You new to sports, Holmes?” He asked, leaning back into his chair and giving me a smugly curious look.

“No, I’m not,” I answered flatly. “I’ve been on one team or another since I was five. The stuff I’m talking about isn’t normal locker room ribbing or hazing.”

“Okay,” he said lightly, like he was humoring a small child. My already ragged nerves crackled. This is why I didn’t come to people with my problems. It was a complete fucking waste of time and energy. “So what did these certain members say, exactly?”

“O’Conner called me a fag, sir.” I was already done trying to be politely vague.

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