Page 61 of Dire Straights

“Yeah, your mom told me what happened when Gwen showed up like that.”

“I didn’t know you knew about that.”

He nodded, giving a grunt of affirmation. “It sounds like you have some… good friends up there already.”

Wincing, I sighed. “She told you about the kiss thing then, right?”

“Yeah,” he confirmed. “She told me.”

We were both quiet for a bit after that. I didn’t know what to say. I hadn’t technically done anything wrong, but we didn’t usually have serious kinds of conversations like this.

“You know, you don’t have to talk to me about any of this,” he finally said. “Or your mom. But if you have anything you want to say, I’d like to hear it.”

“I don’t really know what to say,” I admitted. I’d kind of planned on having this conversation eventually, but Gwen had really sped up the timeline in which I’d planned to approach all this. “What do you want to know?”

“Are you gay? Do you have a boyfriend?”

The questions weren’t accusatory, or full of shock and disgust like when Gwen had screamed at me. They didn’t put me on the defensive or make me feel embarrassed, but it was a really weird feeling talking about it. I hadn’t exactly had to come out to my friends at school, unless admitting that Maddy and I had kissed counted. And it was different when you were talking to someone that was also not straight.

“I’m not gay. But I do have a boyfriend.”

Part of me struggled to voice that second part out loud, since I didn’t know if it was exactly true. Maddy had been clear from the beginning that he wasn’t sure what he wanted, and I respected that. We’d gotten really close, but we hadn’t revisited that conversation. For all I knew, he considered us friends with benefits. But also I felt like if I said weweren’tboyfriends, at least to my dad, then he’d think I was just some horny teenager screwing around with no feelings involved. And that was just something I didn’t want him to think about me.

“So, you think you might be bisexual,” he determined.

“Uh, at this point it’s not really something I’m considering,” I said. “I am bi. The guy I’m seeing… We aren’t exactly a new thing.”

“You want to tell me about him? Is he taking the same classes as you?”

“Um, no…” I cleared my throat, trying to think of what I could say about Maddy that wouldn’t sound completely stupid. “He’s getting his degree in sports medicine. He’s really into athletics and fitness and stuff. He’s on the swim team.”

“Oh, he’s on theswim team,” my dad repeated with his eyebrows comically raised. “Well, la dee da. I could be on the swim team too, if your mother didn’t make such delicious dinners,” he said, patting his dad bod belly. He was always joking and goofing around. My grandparents on his side were really, really serious-minded and no-nonsense so I think that had a lot to do with it.

I laughed, relieved that he’d taken a lot of the weight out of the conversation. “Sure you could, Dad. You know, I’ve been watching football with him.”

“Football? You?” He asked, chuckling. He’d never really been into sports or watched them around me. “Sounds like a true miracle.”

“It’s not so bad, actually.”

“And these board game and movie nights you told me about? He hangs out with your friends, too?”

“We’re all friends, yeah.”

He asked me a few more playful questions about Maddy and our friends, before leaning back in his chair and giving me a more serious look.

“If your mom knew how serious you are about this guy, then I’m sure she would feel a lot differently about trying to get you and Gwen back together,” he said. “I think we should maybe invite her into this talk.”

“It shouldn’t matter if I was with someone else or not,” I argued, but I knew he was right and I needed to actually talk to her. “She went behind my back with this dumb scheme with Gwen. It’s like she respects her and cares about her feelings more than she cares about mine.”

“That’s not true, Ren. Your mom worries about you all the time, but I agree planning the visit with Gwen was a bad decision.” When I didn’t answer, he went on. “Would it be okaywith you if I go talk to her about the stuff you’ve told me? And then once she’s caught up, we can all tackle the Gwen issue.”

Communication was a big thing in my family. Again, because both sets of my grandparents were immigrants from Japan, brushing problems and stuff under the rug to keep up appearances had been a big theme in both of my parents’ childhoods. Because of that, they made sure I felt comfortable talking to them about whatever I had going on.

“Yeah, okay,” I agreed reluctantly. It’s not like I could go the whole winter break without talking to her.

When he left, I crept into the kitchen to make a snack, hoping maybe I could eavesdrop on their conversation, but they were in their bedroom. Quickly slapping ham and mayo on a piece of bread and folding it over into a half-sandwich, I texted Maddy to tell him I’d just come out to my dad.

Seriously?? Was he weird about it?

---