Page 118 of Someone to Watch Over Me

She’s told me that before, but it helps to hear it again, especially in light of current events.

“Thank you for saying that again.”

“I mean it, Hal. I hope you know that.”

“I do, and I believe you. And I think it would be good for the kids to have him there, if needed.”

Her expression conveys confusion. “You do? Really?”

“Of course. Your health is precarious. He’s concerned about his kids, as any good father would be.”

“Okay, where’s thebut?”

“But… if he moves in to care for them, I move in to care for you.”

She stares at me for a long moment before she blinks. “Really?”

“Really. I don’t mind if he’s there for the kids, but I do mind if he’s there for you.”

“So what you’re saying is that…”

“We all live together like one big happy family for as long as we can.”

“And you’d be willing to do that?”

“That’s what I’m saying.”

“Hallie…” Again with the tears.

I hand her another napkin.

“Are you for real? Why aren’t you running away screaming?”

“I ask myself that question every day.”

This time, we both laugh, even as she wipes away more tears.

“I hate that I’m doing this to you after what you’ve already been through.”

“I think that what I’ve been through has made it possible for me to take this on, knowing how it might end.”

She takes a sip of her wine. “How do you mean?”

“When Gwen died so suddenly, I didn’t have any of the coping skills that I’ve acquired in the years since. That’s not to say that losing you would be easier, because it wouldn’t be. It would be different, though. I have a support system I didn’t have then. I have knowledge about grief and grieving I didn’t have then. Every loss is painful and difficult and so, so sad, and I’d feel all those things if I lost you. But I’ve shown myself that I can survive it and even eventually thrive again.”

“You’re the strongest person I know.”

“No, you are. A lot of people would’ve snuggled into the status quo when faced with a diagnosis like yours. You blew up your whole life so you could live as authentically as possible in the time you have left. I think that makes you the strongest person there is.”

“We can nominate each other.”

“Fine. Be that way.”

“I don’t want to leave you sad and devastated.”

“I’ll be okay. I promise.”

“You really want to move in with me?”

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