Page 43 of Deck the Fire Halls

“I think I’ll die if you don’t.”

He smirked as his lips met mine. But then his hands cupped my face, my neck, as he tilted my head and deepened the kiss.

His lips opened mine, his tongue slid into my mouth, and I moaned.

I’d never moaned like that in my life.

He grunted in the back of his throat and kissed me deeper, his body now pressing against me. My hands found his waist, his back, and the feel of his body...

Muscular and hard in all the right places...

Oh my.

I broke the kiss, for air and some mental clarity. “Damn.”

He chuckled, his lips swollen and wet, his eyes dark. And the way he looked at me... like he wanted to devour me.

“You shouldn’t look at me like that,” I murmured, my voice rough.

“How am I looking at you?”

He knew damned well.

“In a way that isn’t conducive to abstinence.”

He laughed and shook his head. “You’re so fucking sexy,” he said. “Is abstinence something you’re striving for?”

I was still a little dazed by the fact he’d just called me sexy... “Uh, no. Not really. I don’t know... without making it awkward, and I’m still on a high from the way you kissed me just now. You were very correct, by the way. Mr. Ling did not need to bear witness to that.”

“Was it obscene enough for you? Because I can do better. I was trying to be polite.”

I barked out a laugh. “Polite. Huh.”

He smirked like the devil himself, but when he took my hand, he interlocked our fingers and was serious again. “You said you were unsure about the abstinence comment and didn’t want to make it awkward. Unsure about what? Rest assured, Rob, there’s no need for it to be awkward here.”

I laughed again and had to remind myself that I was older than him. I was the serious, professional medical practitioner, and there wasn’t any reason for me to be awkward. Despite how I’m certain my cheeks burned red, I didn’t have any reason to be embarrassed.

“I’m not practicing abstinence,” I began. It was easier for me to take a medical approach. “I think we would need to discuss boundaries and expectations before I comment further on the matter of sexual activity.”

He seemed slightly amused. “Okay. Sure. Should we sit down?” He gestured to the sofa.

“Good idea.” I led him to the couch, still holding his hand. God, even holding hands felt good. He waited forme to get my thoughts in order. “It’s nothing really, and I’ve probably set up this entire conversation wrong.”

“It’s fine, Rob. If sex isn’t something you’re comfortable with, it’s okay. You can tell me.”

“No, it’s... I’m very comfortable with it. I was just hoping to maybe not have this conversation until our second date, at least. And I don’t want you to think I’m reading way too much into this. As in waaaaaay too much.”

“Okay,” he said.

God, now I’d made it into a big deal.

I sighed and decided to just get it over with. “You mentioned abstinence, which is not what I’m aiming for here. Believe me. I’ve felt more in that regard in the last four days than I have in years. But before when you were kissing me, I thought if I don’t stop this right now, I was about to ask you to take me to bed. Like now, Soren. And I don’t know if that’s what I want for us. Just yet, that is. Which is why it’s getting awkward, because here I am thinking about the longevity of us when we haven’t really established anything between us at all.”

Soren blinked.

So I kept rambling. “And I don’t want it to sound like I’m saving myself or anything—I think we both know that ship sailed a long time ago?—”

He smiled at that.

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