Page 103 of The Guy Next Door

He reaches his hand up, rests it against my head as I bury my face against his neck, licking and nibbling as he calls out.

His eyes pop open, his mouth agape, and I see the moment, a flash, like he’s lost in pleasure, the sort of moment where he looks free from the darkness of the past, from pain. Caught up as he rolls his head back. My hips piston, the urgency in me seizing control, the pressure climbing, and I feel his cock stiffen in that familiar way, sliding my palm up to feel his warm cum as he shoots.

Staring at his expression as he’s caught up in the moment is too much for me, and it’s only a few more thrusts before I’m finished. It’s explosive as my body crashes against his, my hips urging me to persist, as though my body wants to make sure every drop gets inside.

Zane grips the back of my head and pulls me in for another kiss.

I press my cum-filled hand against his waist and tug him close with the other.

I want to stay like this, lost in this moment, buried within him.

And as we pull away, catching our breath, I realize that for an instant, I forgot.

About all the bullshit.

All the pain.

The relief in Zane’s tone as he whispers, “Thank you,” assures me he did too.

That for even the briefest amount of time, we could escape it all and have this moment with each other.

We recover from the experience and wipe up before returning to bed. We curl up together, interlocking our legs, arms around each other for a few more kisses.

When we pull away, Zane strokes my arm gently. “That was exactly what I needed. Thank you for giving me that.”

“I should be thanking you.”

His gaze lowers to the sheets. “Leif, I need to tell you something.”

Between his body language and the way he says it, I’m sure this is what he’s been keeping from me since our chat with Wes.

“At the coffeehouse, when you were in the restroom, I headed to the front area by the register. I noticed someone leaving… I don’t even know that it was a full second that I saw them, but…it was Isaac. I saw him. At least, I feel like I did.”

“Did you?”

“I don’t know. That’s why I was outside when you came out. I tried to follow him, but when I went out there, I looked for him, for his car, and nothing.”

As his body trembles against mine, tension rises within me. I think about what he told me—about experiencing mania whilehe was trying to make sense of his brother’s disappearance. About how he kept seeing Isaac in places he couldn’t have been.

“Are you okay?” I ask.

He tears up. “It doesn’t feel like it did when it was like that before, but I don’t know what I’m gonna do if that’s happening again. I’m scared, Leif.” He pulls me close for a hug, burying his face against me, and I feel a tear against my shoulder. “What if I’m losing it again?”

It wrecks my heart, reminds me of my own darkness. “If that’s what’s happening, then we’ll figure it out, Zane,” I say without even thinking. “You and me. Together.”

“I don’t want to do that to you. I don’t want to put you through my bullshit.”

“If I was having a hard time, what if I told you I didn’t want to put you through that?”

He chuckles. “I wouldn’t let you out of my fucking sight.”

Is it messed up how safe his words make me feel? Probably, but I don’t give a fuck.

“Then now you know how I feel,” I say.

He pulls away, his eyes red, a little wet underneath. I kiss right under one of his eyes, then the other.

“What if I need to go to the ER?” he asks.

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