Page 74 of Filthy Little Secret

She finishes my tie.

She hasn’t mentioned the injury in relation to Tim, so I’m guessing Greg didn’t relay that part. Just that I’m seeing a drug dealer, which is a relief. Never would have been relieved about that before. Boy, how things have changed.

“So who is this mystery person you haven’t told me anything about?” she asks.

She leans back and inspects her work on my makeup before making eye contact with me.

“What do you want to know?” I ask.

“If he deals drugs.”

I turn from her. I’m not going to lie to her, but I also don’t owe her the truth.

“Is that really true?” she asks.

“Why do you suddenly care about who I’m seeing?”

“I think I have a right to know if you’re deliberately doing this to try and undermine my—”

“Not everything is about you and your career, Mom.”

My words are severe. I didn’t mean to turn this into an attack, but in my defensiveness, I can’t help it.

“You think I can’t see how you keep acting? How distant you are? How you’re bottling up? Do you remember what happened last time you did this?”

I know she’s talking about after Becky died. And it’s like she’s touching that painful bruise on my face again.

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

“When you broke up with Greg, I thought I needed to keep my distance. I watched and made sure you were okay, but ultimately, I came to the conclusion you were fine. But this is worrying me.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you? Look, I know these past few years have been particularly busy. I know I haven’t spent as much time with you as I should have, but I’ve tried, and you know I love you.”

Do I know that?

There was a time where I believe she did, but I think that time has come and gone.

Her expression relaxes. She wraps her arms around me and pulls me in for a hug.

“Keep your face away from my dress,” she says, reminding me that even in this moment, our priority is her career.

She leans back and looks into my eyes, and I can see that she’s concerned about me. “Just be careful, okay?”

As worried as she may be about me, I know she’s also worried about how this would blow up in her own face.

“I will.”

It’s clear my words don’t bring her any comfort.

“Let’s get to it then,” she says before grinning. A forced smile. The story of our family.

When we get into the Audi Q5, my phone vibrates. Despite how upset I am with Tim, I’ve been waiting for him to reach out.

And when I check my phone, I’m relieved to see it’s from him.

Thank God.

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