Page 55 of The Christmas You Crash

“No, that’s okay. Just don’t make me laugh. She probably thinks I’m with my best friend, Rachel, or something. She’ll askquestions if she hears a guy in the background.” And I donotwant to answer questions about Ryder or this week.

“Got it,” he says, pantomiming zipping his lips.

I’m smiling and shaking my head as I press the answer button. “Hey, Mom. Merry Christmas.”

“Sweetheart! Merry Christmas. I miss you.”

Some of the tightness that’s been strangling my chest since my dad called Ryder eases with my mom’s words. She’s not perfect, but she’s a great mom, and I love her. Don’t love Jeff, but I love her. “I miss you too, Mom. How’s your day been so far?”

“Oh, it’s been lovely, just lovely. We got some snow. It’s always magical to have a white Christmas, isn’t it?”

My eyes move to the windows, where all I can see is white. Despite my annoyance with the power outage and the fact that the roads are impassable, the snow really is beautiful. Even I can’t deny that. Plus, it’s given me this time with Ryder, so maybe it is a bit magical. “Yeah, it is. We got a lot of snow here too. It was basically a blizzard.”

My mom hums a sound of surprise. “Oh, really? I didn’t realize the Twin Cities got hit that hard. I saw that there was supposed to be a decent amount of snow, but a blizzard? Are you safe?”

Shit.“Oh, yeah, I’m totally safe. And I don’t know if it was technically a blizzard, but it sure was a lot of snow.”

“Well, as long as you’re safe and warm, honey, that’s all that matters.” She pauses as someone speaks in the background. I can’t make out what they’re saying, but it sounds like a man’s voice. Probably Jeff. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. “So, are you with your father today?”

I should have expected the awkward questions to come sooner or later. It’s always like this with her, now. She’s aware I don’t see Dad often, but she still asks every time we talk. I know she’s hurting, and I know she’s not trying to put me inthe middle of things, but it’s awkward as hell for me. Especially when it comes to Jeff. I have no idea what to say to her about the guy. I want her to be happy; I do. But I just can’t make myself give Jeff a chance.

I glance at Ryder. “Nope. Not with Dad. Haven’t even talked to him today.”

My mom is silent for a beat, then she lets out a deep sigh. “Oh, honey. I’m sorry. I’m sure he’s just busy. He’ll call.”

Right. He’s just busy hanging out with Rogues people and calling the guy I’m crushing on while forgetting I exist. “Yeah, Mom.” I steal another look at Ryder. “I’m sure he’ll call.”

“He will, honey. Yes, your father and I have had our differences, but there’s one thing we will always have in common—we both love you so much. He’ll call. He loves you.”

I know she’s trying to be reassuring, but it’s awfully difficult to sound convincing when you know damned well that what you’re saying might be a lie. Or, at the very least, wishful thinking. Still, I appreciate the effort.

“I don’t want to talk about Dad,” I tell her. “Tell me about your day.”

“Oh, it’s been low key. Jeff and I made breakfast, then we went to an early dinner at his sister’s house, and now we’re relaxing and watching some movies. He got me this lovely necklace. I can’t wait to show you.” Jeff says something in the background, and my mother laughs. It’s such a girlish sound, it takes me by surprise.

When did my mom start laughing like that?

“That’s nice,” I tell her.

“Jeff says Merry Christmas, by the way. Do you want to talk to him?”

God, no. “Oh, uh, tell him I said Merry Christmas, too, but I really should get going.”

“Oh?” I hate that she sounds disappointed, but come on. Forcing me to talk to a guy I don’t know and don’t particularlywantto know over the phone won’t do anything but make me feel awkward as hell. “Am I interrupting something?”

A burst of panic shoots down my spine as I turn to Ryder, who’s watching this whole interaction with great interest. Like it’s another piece of the puzzle that is Lexi Cross, and he’s figuring out where this one fits. “No, not interrupting anything. I was just decorating some sugar cookies.”

“Oh, I miss doing that with you. Okay, honey, well, I’ll let you go. I just wanted to hear your voice and tell you I miss you and love you.”

“Miss you and love you too, Mom.” My heart gives a squeeze. I hate that I’m rushing to get off the phone with her, but the longer we talk, the more likely I am to slip up and say something about Ryder. And consideringIdon’t even know what’s going on with us, I’m certainly not in a place where I feel able to explain it to my mom. My mom, who is waiting for me to call and tell her I’ve metthe one.

She’s surprisingly romantic for a woman who spent the best years of her life married to a guy more committed to his career than her.

“I’ll come by soon, okay? Thanks for calling.”

She hums a sound of excitement. “You’d better. Merry Christmas, honey.”

“Merry Christmas.”

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