Page 57 of Body Checked By the Defenseman

“Ruby, you clearly don’t owe me anything,” Charlie starts and I see how much I’ve hurt her.

“Please don’t do that. I know I’ve been acting weird and keeping secrets, but please don’t say I don’t owe you because you’re my best friend, and I want us to be there for each other.”

“But…” she says.

“There are no buts,” I reply, feeling so guilty. “Everything happened so fast. I told you about the guy I was seeing from my kin class. He was so good-looking, I thought he was my type but when we kissed, I wasn’t feeling it. I never feel anything and that scared me.”

“I don’t have a problem with how you were feeling. I have a problem that you’ve kept the most important parts of your life a secret, while I trusted you with my most-cherished secrets,” she answers.

“I feel terrible, Charlie. I didn’t expect Mack to even speak to me when I moved in. He’d barely spoken to me the last couple years I’ve been here and I hated his radio silence, but I gotused to it. Then we were thrown into the situation in the house and. . .” I bite my lip.

“You don’t have to tell me, Ruby. You shouldn’t feel obligated,” she states. She isn’t trying to be mean, but she’s hurting and I’m at fault.

“I don’t feel obligated. It was one crazy thing after another. The first morning we were here, Briar drove you to the sports complex and I stayed behind. I took a shower because I was a sweaty mess after that whole mess in Campbell Hall. I was upstairs leaving the shower in a towel and heading to my brother’s room when I bumped into Mack. I don’t even know how it happened, but my towel dropped and I was mortified,” I explain.

Her eyes turn wide. “You’re kidding.”

“I was mortified,” I repeat. “The first boy to see me naked and it wasn’t intentional.”

“Oh, Rubes, I wish you would’ve trusted me with all this.” She sighs.

“I wish I would’ve too. I don’t know what I was thinking, other than it was very wrong for me to want Mack. He isn’t just my brother’s best friend. We were close when we were younger, and he is literally a part of my family. So many things could go wrong and, on some level, it felt like what was happening was some sort of crazy dream or fantasy. I was living in this Macklin bubble. I feared if I blinked wrong it would be over, and this feeling I have would end and I never want it to end.”

“Are you in love with him?” she asks.

“Yes,” I reply. I don’t have to think twice. “I’m pretty sure I was in love with him since I was fourteen, but it was so wrong of me to feel this way. He calls my grandma Abuela. He is hers like Hayden and me. I also didn’t realize he wanted me the way I wanted him. It was like that day my towel dropped things changed, and they could never go back.”

“So he took your V-card. Congratulations,” she says.

“He hasn’t. He’s being so frustrating. He feels guilty about Hayden, but now. . .I’ve kind of convinced him that it has to be this weekend. Hopefully, tomorrow.”

“Rubes, I’m seriously happy for you. I can see how happy he makes you and if I see it, I’m sure Hayden and Abuela will see it too,” she assures.

“I’m not expecting them to be so understanding,” I admit. “Mack has a reputation.”

“But he cares for you,” Charlie reminds.

“He does,” I agree, probably looking like I have hearts in my eyes. “He’s been completely amazing about this whole situation, but we’ve been lying to our family and friends. I feel like shit about it.”

“I think I know something about that.” She exhales.

“I hope you can forgive me,” I say to her.

“Of course. You’re my person, Rubes,” she replies, and I don’t know why I am so emotional today, but my eyes fill with tears.

“You’re my person too, Charlie.” I hug her. She hugs me back.

“Don’t worry, Finn and I will go somewhere tomorrow to give you guys some privacy. I’m super excited for you.” She yawns.

“Thanks, babe, it feels good and exciting. Only one problem. We need Aaron gone. He’s loyal to Hayden. I don’t need him calling my brother and being a snitch.”

“We can take Aaron with us. I want tomorrow to be special for you.” She smiles and yawns again.

I yawn too.

“Thanks, I don’t know what I did to deserve a best friend like you, but I’ll take it.”

“Back at you, Rubes, you’ve been so supportive of me and Finn all along,” Charlie states.

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