Page 72 of Forever Player

“Hi,” I say as she turns to close the door.

“Hi,” she replies but she doesn’t look at me. Her chin is slightly tilted to the side as she walks past me to the kitchen. Stubborn woman. She gets me fired up so I stand and follow her to the kitchen.

“Was Maylee okay?” she asks. That’s all she’s got after the way she took off.

“She cried on the way home in the car, but she settled once I gave her a bottle. We played a bit and now she’s asleep.” I give her the rundown and place my fists on each of my hips. We need to talk and she isn’t even looking at me.

“How was your meeting?” I push because I am not walking away from her now. We need to deal with what happened if we are going to have a future together.

She goes to the cabinet and fills a glass of water and drinks it down fast. “Good, I’ll start working this weekend.”

“Good,” I say, feeling like I am walking on eggshells. I am also not liking these one-word answers. “There’s a breakfast meal in the container,” I point to the counter. “I got you eggs, bacon, and pancakes.”

“Thanks, I’m starving,” she replies.

“I thought you would call me to pick you up,” I prod, hoping to open our channels of communication.

“I don’t need a chauffeur, Brett,” she snaps.

Okaaayyy.

“I thought you didn’t have Uber set up,” I explain.

“I’m a big girl. I’ve been taking care of myself a long time, and I plan on continuing on that route,” she states, and she sounds pissed. She takes the food and sits at the kitchen table and starts to eat.

I scrub the scruff on my chin. I need to find a way to deescalate whatever is going on. “Look, Willow, I don’t know what happened to get you so angry this morning. I’m sorry if I did something wrong. This is the first time I have ever wanted a relationship, and I am doing my best here, but I feel like I am on training wheels right now and I know I am going to screw up. All I am asking is that you be honest and open with me. We can’t deal with each other if you are shut down and angry. That isn’t a good environment for Maylee. You said that is how your parents were, but we need to do better here. I’ve dissected the situation in the restaurant all morning and the only thing I came up with is that you may be thinking I slept with that waitress. I realize she was photographed leaving my apartment and she made the cut for some stupid news article about me. What I can tell you is I did not sleep with her. I brought her back here with that intention but we weren’t together. It also happened months ago. You disappeared on me and I didn’t know where you were but when I brought her back here, I realized I didn’t want her. I couldn’t go through with it because I was still thinking about you. We basically spent an hour talking about you. I told her that after all this time I couldn’t stop thinking about you and how it wasn’t like me to be pining for someone. Stacey was disappointed but she heard me out. She also told me that she hoped I found you one day. Back in the restaurant she knew you were the one I wanted, and she told me not to give up.”

Willow places her fork down and sulks back into the chair. “You feel like you are on training wheels, but I don’t even feel that way. I’m lost, Brett. I can’t measure up to these women in your past. They are all so beautiful and perfect. You have women throwing themselves at you left, right, and center. I am too insecure to deal with all that. I also can’t allow myself to like you more than a friend because I am terrified. I don’t want a broken heart. I don’t want to be some bitter old lady,” she confesses and tears spring from her eyes.

“Come here, Honey,” I urge. I walk over to her and wrap my arms around her. “I don’t think you understand me here, Willow. Those women were in my past but it was all meaningless. I didn’t know them and they didn’t know me. They didn’t care to know me and I am done with meaningless hookups. I want something real in my life. I’ve felt like this for a while now. I haven’t slept with a single woman since I’ve been with you. That night was special to me.”

“What?” She pulls out of my embrace and looks up to me, staring into my eyes like she is searching for something, maybe truth. “You haven’t been with anyone?”

“I haven’t,” I affirm softly. “The night we were together, I shared things with you I have never shared. We spoke about our fears and commitment issues but it was more than that, and I was hoping you felt the same way.”

She wipes at her tears. “I felt the same way and it terrified me. That’s why I had to leave town when I found out I was pregnant. Because you scare the shit out of me, Brett. You make me feel things I’ve never felt. I’ve never had this kind of attraction before and I don’t know how to handle it.”

“I understand you completely, but what I also know is I can’t walk away from you. I want us to be together. I need to explore this thing between us because I think we can be fire together, and I don’t just mean in bed.”

“You’re asking for a lot.” She laughs through her tears. “I’m insecure and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”

“We’ll figure things out together, but I need you to promise me you will not shut down and run away when something goes wrong. I need you to tell me when I screw up and I need to know what you need from me. I can tell you right now you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I only want you, Willow. I don’t care about other women. I am not some cheating asshole. I promise you I will be loyal only to you.” Then something dawns on me. “What happened that day back on the farm?”

“Huh?” She pulls her head back and looks at me with confusion.

“The day I went to work with your brothers. You just disappeared that day and then something changed. You pulled away. I should’ve called you out on it that same day, but I was scared of rocking the boat, but I am not scared now. You call me out on my shit, and I’ll do the same for you.”

She pulls out of my embrace and walks away from me, giving me her back. She wraps her arms around her chest, her hand resting on her shoulder facing the wall.

“I read the articles about me showing up to the arena, and then I just kept clicking on more stories about what a ladies’ man you are, and I felt in over my head with you,” she confesses quietly, her tone hurt and broken.

I walk over to her and place my hand on her shoulder.

“I have a past I can’t take back, but those women didn’t mean anything to me. I’m at a point in my life where I want more. I want to be good enough for a woman like you,” I admit, and I hear her breath catch as she turns around and watches me with confusion in her eyes.

“What does that mean?” she asks.

“You are smart, beautiful, and kind. I know you don’t just sleep around. You are guarded, and the night we were together you were hurting and wanting a distraction. I was the one who was there, but I also know you would have never gone for a guy like me if the circumstances were different. My head was all messed up after that night. I had never opened up to a woman before. I never felt that way before and I knew I wasn’t good enough for you. I knew I had to make a change within myself so I would be a man you wanted. That’s why I couldn’t let you go. I asked about your whereabouts at Connor and Ellie’s wedding, and a bunch of times after that, because you stuck with me.”

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