Page 58 of Forever Player

We say bye and I turn on the television but nothing catches my interest, so I open my socials to see what all the hoopla is about. My eyes bulge as I read article after article. Fuck me. No wonder Willow pulled away. This shit is over the top. I realize it’s also true to a certain extent, and I have some damage control to tend to.

My eye lull shut. The door opening wakes me up. Willow walks in. Quietly turning the knob on the door as to not make noise.

“How was your night?” I ask.

She jumps and spins around to look at me.

“Great, thanks.” She walks to the kitchen and grabs a glass and fills it with water.

“Can we talk?” I ask her back.

“It’s late,” she replies and she refills the glass.

“Did you want me to sleep on the floor tonight?” I ask, not wanting to intrude on her space if she is pissed.

“You can sleep in the bed. It’s big enough,” she replies, but she isn’t looking me in the eyes and it irks me.

“I can wake up with Maylee in the morning. You should get sleep,” I offer.

It’s then she looks in my eyes. “Fine.” She takes her glass and heads upstairs. I figure it’s best if I wait down here and give her privacy in her room to get changed.

I’m really out of my element here. I have no relationship skills and nothing to grasp on to from childhood. All I have are examples of my teammates and their relationships. The closest one being Kaleb with my sister, Maddie. Kaleb was there for her over and over again. That’s what I have to do for Willow. Prove to her that she is it for me.

I head to the kitchen and drink some water, then I head upstairs. As I am taking the stairs, I hear the front door open again but I don’t stop to see who it is. I do hear Willow’s mom humming though so I make a straight line for Willow’s room. She’s tucked in bed with her back facing me. I get into bed and stare at the ceiling for a bit before I drift off.

The next few days follow the same routine of Willow barely speaking to me. I wake up with Maylee and let her sleep in. I work the farm a few hours and Willow takes Maylee to town. When I get back from a day’s work she barely acknowledges me, no matter how many times I plead with her. By the fourth day I’ve had enough. I only have a few days left in Sugar Meadow, and there is no way I can leave things the way they are.

CHAPTERFOURTEEN

Willow

The last few days have been screwing with my head. Reading those articles about Brett was the smartest thing I did. It reminded me not to fall for the gorgeous man who is too helpful with our daughter and trying to do everything right. I realize when I went out with Bonnie the other night, I was doing exactly what Mom used to do after she fought with Dad. She would get dressed up really pretty and make him jealous by going out to some bar with her single friends. I can’t believe I’ve repeated her behaviors. It makes me realize how fucked up I really am. The only spin on all this is that Brett isn’t acting like Dad. Dad would shut down and not talk to her and when he did talk it was to snap at her in an angry, volatile way, or make jabs at her about how incompetent she was as a wife and mother. Instead, Brett has been totally chill. He tells me I look beautiful in the morning. He lets me sleep in while he takes care of Maylee and he has breakfast ready for me when I get downstairs. I want to smile and thank him, which is a weird instinct for me to have. I remind myself that whatever Brett is doing now is temporary, and I will not be the fool who falls for him.

“Willow, I would like us to go into Nashville and spend the day together,” he says as he finishes setting the table for breakfast. This morning’s menu consists of French toast and fresh berries.

I watch him like he has two heads. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“You’ve completely shut down on me. If we are going to co-parent Maylee, we need to be open about things. I’ve never felt this way before and I know my words may be scaring the hell out of you, but I need to leave in a few days and I can’t leave with this tension radiating between us.”

His blue eyes look so sincere, and he is so open and honest about everything. I don’t know how to handle it. Shutting down is what most of the Heatons do best, except for Finn, but we call him the baby anomaly.

“I don’t know any other way,” I confess. Not because I am giving in but because he is right. We do need to find a way to co-parent that doesn’t involve tension. “Shutting down is what I know.”

I divert my gaze from him, feeling vulnerable. I do not like to feel vulnerable but I love my daughter to the moon and back. If it means I need to change my ways since I know I am messed up, then so be it.

Brett takes a seat at the kitchen table beside me while Maylee is getting her swing time. His shoulders are hunched and there is a softness in his gaze. “I get it, Willow. I’m treading on uncharted waters here. My parents didn’t really have a relationship, but I know what I want in life. I sometimes feel like maybe my attraction to you is one-sided. If it is, I understand because we can’t obviously control who we are attracted to, but I am here, Willow. If I’ve done something wrong, I need you to tell me. I’m doing the best I can but if I need to fix something, then I’m willing.”

His words gut me. They make my stomach turn. I don’t know how to react to what he is saying. My instinct is to confess I am falling so hard for him, but he is a fuckboy who will destroy my heart. My mind and body have gone into protection mode and won’t let me fall. I can’t say any of this because it will put me in a vulnerable position. I don’t like feeling weak.

“I think we made a mistake the other night. It was too much too fast. We can’t risk not getting along,” I say, instead wishing I could be as truthful and open as him.

“I’m sorry if that was too fast. We can take things slow between us,” he replies, reaching out to touch my hand, but I still have the urge to protect myself so I pull my hand away.

His bushy brown brows furrow.

“We need to just focus on Maylee,” I remind.

“But we were getting along. I thought we were at least friends. We have a good time together. Am I reading this whole situation wrong?” He looks so upset by my words that my heart cracks just a little bit, but I won’t allow for too much emotion, knowing a man like him can suck me under. The way he is with our daughter and our chemistry together is too much to handle.

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