Page 25 of Forever Player

“Are you a troublemaker, sweetheart?” I smile down at her.

She smiles back at me, and it makes cleaning the mess in her diaper not so bad. “Don’t worry, because I’m a troublemaker too, but I know that’s got to stop because I have to be responsible for you.”

If someone would have told me, even a week ago, that this is what I would be doing, I would’ve told them they were certifiable, but here I am and I am liking it, which is the crazy part.

Since the diaper leaked, I change her sleeper and undershirt thingy. Then I pick her up and kiss her cheek. “All nice and clean now. Let’s go finish our shopping, ya?” I place her back in her snowsuit and then into the baby carrier. I am sweating profusely because I wasn’t going to take off my jacket and then change her. When I head back out, Rodney has my order ready. I thank him and continue on to the cheese counter. From there I grab some nuts and other snack food and head over to the register with a shopping cart that is overflowing.

“Oh, geez, let me help you unload all this,” the lady behind the cash register says.

“It’s okay, I got it,” I assure her.

I begin to put my stuff on the conveyor belt and Maylee starts shrieking, causing my heart rate to kick up so I start unloading faster.

“Why don’t I call Lewis over? He can bag everything up and take it to your car,” the woman behind the register offers.

“Sure, okay,” I agree because this is stressful. I rock Maylee and talk to her peacefully. A text comes in from Willow and I see it’s already half past three, which means Maylee needs a bottle. I quickly text Willow back that everything is fine, but it’s not okay. This is really hard and I am stressing.

With the groceries packed, I pass the woman my credit card.

“I’m Dolly, by the way,” the woman says.

“Huh?” I’m so flustered I can’t really focus on her.

“My name is Dolly. It’s nice to finally meet Maylee’s father,” she says.

“Oh, yeah, nice to meet you,” I reply tensely.

She smiles at me.

“So are you and Willow a thing?” she asks.

My head is spinning.

“What do you mean?” I ask her.

“You know, are you two together now?” she asks.

I can’t tell if she is trying to find out for the town gossip mill or if she is hitting on me.

“Willow and I are definitely a thing,” I say to her.

Her lips twist. “Well, you’re all checked out. Lewis will meet you by your car.”

I head out into the cold. Snowflakes are falling now. I have Maylee’s diaper bag on my shoulder and Maylee in the carrier in front of me. I see Lewis and point to Jacob’s truck.

“Wow, you’re driving Jacob Heaton’s truck,” he says like it’s a weird thing.

“Yup,” I say.

He loads me up. I pass him a few singles and head into the cab of the truck. I turn the engine on and crank up the heat. With Maylee in the carrier, I prepare a bottle for Maylee, but it takes a few minutes because I have to heat the breast milk with some boiling water I have in a thermos and the bottle needs to sit in the cup a few minutes to heat. Meanwhile, Maylee is having a fit, and I feel like I’m losing years off my life. I don’t know how Willow’s done it on her own because it seems like her family hasn’t been all that hands-on, besides living with her and giving Maylee the occasional attention.

With the bottle ready I check it on the inside of my arm by pouring a bit on my skin. It feels like it’s a good temperature, so I have to get out of the cab to unhook Maylee from the baby carrier while she is shrieking. Then I get back in the truck, get my baby in position on my arm, and place the bottle at her lips. She calms instantly and after a few beats I take a calming breath too.

“You have got vocals on you for a tiny little thing,” I murmur to her.

She finishes the bottle fast. I burp her and get her in the back seat in her car seat.

I start to drive, feeling completely drained from that small outing to the supermarket.