Page 16 of Forever Player

“Of course,” I reply, and I softly place Maylee in bed.

I then turn to Willow. “I meant what I said. I’m here for you too. Now, is there a bottle I can feed her if she wakes up?”

Willow looks at me with her lips parted. She doesn’t answer for a beat and then she says, “Why?”

“Because if she needs to eat, I will feed her. You need to sleep. I’m guessing you’ve been doing all the night feedings on your own, and you don’t have to do that anymore. When I’m here, she is my responsibility too.”

Willow’s mouth forms an O. “Uh, there were times Jacob helped out when I was just about to lose my mind at the beginning. She didn’t breastfeed easily. Took me about three weeks to get her to latch properly. We were substituting with formula at that point, but I really wanted to breastfeed and I’m stubborn. I wanted to give her the best,” she speaks quickly.

“Willow, my sister got pregnant, and the dad was a deadbeat who never took responsibility. I’m just going to lay this out here, so you get me. I saw how hard the beginning was. I wasn’t always there for Maddie, but my mom was and so was I when I could be. I’m not a deadbeat dad. In fact, I plan on getting the fucking father of the year award every damn year. So, I need you to get used to me. I also need you to tell me what I’m supposed to feed my baby so you can sleep.”

Willow blinks and then she sighs, and her shoulders deflate. “Follow me. I’ll show you where I keep the frozen breast milk. You can just take it out when you need and defrost a couple of hours before,” she explains. I follow her back downstairs and to the kitchen. She flicks on the lights and opens the freezer to show me all the milk she has stored.

“I kind of feel like a cow,” she chortles.

“You are not a cow,” I assure her.

She then opens one of the cabinets and shows me the baby bottles. She also shows me the bottle sterilizer, explaining she knows she doesn’t have to sterilize anymore but it makes her feel better doing it, so I assure her I will sterilize the bottles.

Then she looks at me. “I’m glad you’re here, Brett.”

“I am too. We have a lot of lost time to make up for.”

“Yeah,” she sighs and then she blinks. She watches me like she doesn’t know what to make of me. The night we met I was in bachelor mode. I saw a beautiful woman who intrigued me, and I wanted nothing more than to get in her pants. She was a challenge and I thrived on it. Now, she is the mother of my child. Yet, she’s always been so much more, and I know that because she is the last woman I slept with, and that is really messed up for me. I’ve been trying to move on from that night and I just couldn’t.

“I’ll grab my stuff and take it up to Maylee’s room, and I’ll defrost one of these bags.” I point to the breast milk.

“She should probably be good until about seven,” Willow says.

“Good to know. You take it easy and sleep. I got her. I’m serious. I don’t want to see you before noon,” I warn her.

“You can’t be serious,” she retorts with a snort-laugh.

“I’m dead serious.” I look into her tired eyes.

“Okay, well then, I have her started on cereal,” she explains. She then shows me the bowls and how many tablespoons to prepare and points at the high chair in the corner I didn’t notice before.

“Okay, cereal in the morning.”

“Okay,” Willow says.

“Okay,” I repeat.

“Should we go upstairs then?” Willow asks.

“Yup,” I reply with a pop. I grab my bag and follow her upstairs. My eyes zero in on her behind. She looks more curvaceous now and I’m digging it. I lick my lips watching her but when I feel my cock hardening, I have to think of unsexy things because that is the last place Willow and I need to go.

We need to build a foundation for ourselves as co-parents, and then I need to convince her I’m more than just a player.

She says good night and I say good night too. I head into the bathroom beside Maylee’s room and change into a T-shirt and shorts. Then I head into Maylee’s room. Willow has fixed the blanket for me on the floor with the pillows. I place my bag in the corner and then walk over to Maylee’s crib, and I just stare at her. Then I sit in the rocking chair and check my phone. I must have put it on silent in the car and when I look at it, it’s blowing up with messages from Maddie.

I send her a quick message that I’m okay and we’ll talk soon. I also tell her I will need her to go to my apartment and pack me a suitcase for the next two weeks. Since she lives next door to me in Kaleb’s apartment, it’s an easy ask.

She tells me to send her the address so I reply I will in the morning because I’m in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere.

I yawn, feeling completely drained from the emotional roller coaster of this day. I lie down on the floor. It’s a hardwood floor and the blanket isn’t all that thick, but I want to be close to my daughter. I stare up at the ceiling. This isn’t how I saw my life going but after being with Willow that night, something changed in my mind. Sure, I was very attracted to her and our chemistry was mind-numbing, but it was more than that. We didn’t just have sex; we spoke about life. We connected over our messed-up feelings about relationships. We may have vowed to never settle down, but I retract my vow. After spending the last fourteen months thinking of Willow, and today learning about my daughter, I know in my heart of hearts I want it all. I want Willow to be mine. Only I can tell she isn’t on the same page, which means I am going to have to work for it.

CHAPTERTHREE

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