Page 12 of Anti Player

“So, I don’t make you nervous,” she says.

“I guess not.” I smile.

“That’s good.” She grins. “But I don’t get how offering these kids sports exercises will make them stop stuttering.”

“It’s not really to help them stop. It’s more about providing them with a safe place. A place they can feel comfortable to be themselves. When I started playing hockey, I was made fun of but once those same kids had to play me on the ice, and I showed them my skills, they had a new respect for me. I never forgot some of those initial reactions. Those stung and I remember them until today, but as time went on, I met good people who didn’t care how I spoke and, eventually, I mostly grew out of it.”

“Wow, that’s really inspiring.”

The waiter brings over our drinks.

We converse some more and then Taylor says, “I’d love to see your place.”

My body turns rigid at her suggestion. I was hoping to get to know her. Don’t people want to date and get to know one another anymore before hopping in the sack? Her forwardness throws me off.

“I was hoping we could get to know each other before I show you my place,” I reply.

“Okay, okay.” She twirls a piece of hair through her fingers. “You’re a nice guy. You aren’t only interested in sex.”

Her comment makes me chuckle. “I’m at a point in my life where I was hoping to get to know someone before jumping into bed.”

I figure that is the only way I will go all the way, when I know I am with someone who really wants to be with me. I get that sex is all about getting off, but for me it needs to be more. I don’t know why I am like this; it’s just how I feel.

“Interesting,” Taylor says like she is really pondering my words. “I’m digging that. I’d like to get to know you better, Kaleb Bardot.”

Something inside me feels taken aback by her words and it’s that I never told her my last name.

I smile. It isn’t hard to look me up and I guess she did just that.

After our little date, I walk her back to her apartment, which isn’t too far from the coffee place. I peck her cheek, and she smiles and tells me to have a good night.

I’m not overly excited about how the date went. Maybe it’s me, I don’t know. Taylor is pretty. She was nice enough, but I didn’t feel a real spark between us. Thing is, I’ve never really tried to get to know someone before. Being a professional athlete has always meant women just offer themselves up to us. I know how to pleasure a woman and how to receive pleasure, but I’venever tried building something with a foundation before. Maybe this just feels off for that exact reason.

I call an Uber from where I am standing on the street because it’s late, and I don’t feel like walking all the way home.

When I get back to the apartment, I exit the elevator on my floor and I am about to head into my apartment when I spot Maddie sitting on a window ledge, staring out into the city. She is clearly so deep in thought she hasn’t realized I’m here.

“Mad Pie?” I ask as I slowly approach her.

When she turns her head, her eyes are red. “Oh, Kaleb.” She swipes at her eyes, wiping away tears.

“What’s going on?” I approach her like I would a scared animal.

“My life is just a mess. I needed some space and I was pissed at Brett. You know he means well, right?” she asks, referring to him outing me earlier.

“Yes, I’m aware Brett means well. He can just be a lot sometimes.” I grin and rock back on my heels.

She giggles. “Tell me about it.”

“But you aren’t upset because of Brett,” I observe, watching her.

She shakes her head and licks her lips. She’s wearing short shorts and she has her knees pulled up to her chest. Her dirty-blond hair sits in a bun on her head. She is so beautiful it hurts to look at her. Seeing her upset guts me.

“I keep messing up, Kaleb. How many times does a person need to mess up to really learn?” she asks.

“You’re being too hard on yourself. You have a big heart. You always have, Mad Pie. You just give it too easily because you think everyone is good like you are.”

She watches me and her lips spread in a smile. It makes my chest ache. “You’re a good guy, Kaleb. Do you want to explain to me why you haven’t taken a woman to bed?”

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