Page 50 of Willow in the Wind

A blessing? Or a curse?

“Hi,” Stella said, approaching the desk. Her voice wavered. “Thank you. I’d like to check into my room?”

The woman handed her a key card and asked a bellhop to take “Miss Sutton” to her suite. Stella hadn’t expected a full suite. She’d envisioned a single room with a single bed and a single dresser. But the bellhop opened an old wooden door to reveal a suite with a bedroom, an office, and a living and dining area that looked out over the lush green of Central Park. Stella’s heart ballooned.

“Goodness,” Stella said. “Thank you.”

The bellhop looked at her with surprise. She hurried to tip him, then waited till he left and closed the door behind him to hurry to the window and fully freak out. The entire city pulsed beneath her, and Central Park stretched out to miles of green trails and rolling fields and ponds. This was the city of the world, the city where everything happened.

She was so excited. She let herself forget that James hadn’t called her back last night.

Stella didn’t have time to laze around in her ostentatiously expensive suite. That afternoon at four thirty, she had her first interview with a literary podcast that wanted to talk about the art of writing memoirs. She was inexperienced with interviews and practiced talking out loud as she got ready. “The thing about memoir is,” she told the mirror as she put on lipstick, “is that it has to feel real? Ugh. No, Stella. It has to feel…” She winced. Maybe good quotes would come to her when she was in the studio.

Stella took a taxi to the podcast studio, which was located in Brooklyn. She loved crossing the bridge and listening to the taxi driver tell stories about his first years in the city. He’d come from Hungary, he said, but his parents had escaped during the Cold War with the hope that America would offer new opportunities for their son.

“It was difficult when we first got here,” he explained. “But my father fought hard to keep food on the table. Just like me. I’m fighting now, too.”

Stella’s heart went out to him. She thanked him for the brilliant ride and tipped him a little too much. Somehow, his openness with her had reminded her of the Greek men she’d met at the tavernas with James.

It’s like I can relate everything in my life back to that pivotal time.

Stella entered the studio and met the podcasters—sisters named Natasha and Brittany. They were semi-famous novelists who’d begun a podcast to advertise their work.

“But we mostly just podcast now,” Natasha said with a laugh as they got set up. “I haven’t written a word in years.”

“I hope you find your way back to it someday,” Stella said. “I took years off writing. And it found me again.”

“Save it for the recording!” Brittany urged with a smile. “We want to know everything.”

The interview was fluid, for the most part. It was clear that Brittany and Natasha knew how to talk to writers and make them feel at ease. Very soon, Stella forgot she was being recorded and fell into easy conversation.

“Tell us a bit about your life at home in Nantucket,” Natasha said. “You have children, correct?”

“I have two kids. They’re sixteen and eighteen. My son just left for college this past month, which broke my heart a little,” Stella said. “But he’s happy, and we’ve talked a little on the phone.”

“It must be fascinating to release this book right when your son leaves for college,” Brittany said. “It’s clear you’re very familiar with the anxieties of being that age. Did you pass along any advice to your son? Any advice that you could pass to your readers now?”

Stella laughed nervously. “I can’t pretend to offer any advice. I know how complicated that time of your life is. I also know how angry my mother was with me at that time. She wanted me to nail down my career and have a family. But I didn’t know what I wanted!”

“Who does?” Brittany said with a laugh.

“I’d say, follow your heart,” Stella said. “As cheesy as that sounds. It’s always worked for me. It’s probably why my ex-husband and I are still so close. We’ve been open and honest with each other since the beginning.”

Although I never told him about James.

We talked about everything else.

Even our separation.

Even Mandy.

Even Bruce.

“I love when couples separate and still find ways to be in each other’s lives,” Natasha agreed. “It’s so loving and adult.”

“Agreed,” Brittany said.

“I want to ask the question that’s on everyone’s mind,” Natasha said, wincing as though this were painful for her rather than for Stella. “I want to ask about J.”

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