Page 84 of I Won't Be In On Monday

My phone rings a second later, and I decide to answer it. "Yes. What do you want?"

"So it's really not going well, is it?" he says.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because you were texting me and now you answered the phone." He chuckles.

"Marco's a dickhead."

"I told you he was."

"You didn't know he was a dickhead."

"I guessed he was. I have a sixth sense about these things."

"Yeah. Well, I am trying to figure out how I'm going to get out of the restaurant without him seeing."

"You're still on the date?"

"I am still on the date," I say. "And I don't want to be."

"Wow, it's that bad? What happened? He chewed up his steak and spat it on the plate?"

"We haven't even sat down yet. He didn't have a reservation."

"You mean he forgot to make one?"

"No, he wasn't going to make a reservation. He said it was just like a trick to make me think that he was going to take me to a nice dinner, when instead, he was going to ask me to go to his place so we could bang.”

There’s silence on the other side of the phone. “So, he's a bigger douche than I thought he was." Remington sounds pissed. "Are you okay?"

"Not really. I feel really..."

"Where are you?" he interrupts me.

"What do you mean, where am I?"

"Where are you? I'm coming to rescue you."

"I don't need you to rescue me, Remington. I'm fine."

"Juniper Hardman, tell me you are where you are right now. You don't want to be on that date, right?"

"No."

"And you don't just want to tell him to his face, right?"

"I mean, I guess I could, but..."

"Where are you?"

"Fine. I am at Heaven and Earth Fine Dining Restaurant on 34th Street."

"I'll be there in ten minutes. Just go to the front, and I'll be there."

"What if the maître d’ seats us before then?"

"Then sit. Don't worry. You won't be there long."

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