Page 98 of Audiophile

“This isn’t how I wanted to tell you, and I hate that I have to say it over the phone.” Petra is quiet, but doesn’t argue. “That night I was tattooed, I also ended up with a marriage certificate. I had plenty of evidence against Kinley, and it was all legally scrubbed, like it never happened. She is not and hasneverbeen my—” The word burns in the back of my mouth.

“Oh my God.” Petra gasps. “I never imagined—I was scared and angry, but I should’ve considered—Tesoro mio.I shouldn’t have considered her story for a minute. I’m sorry. I don’t know how you survived her.”

My skin crawls with the reminder of the past. I want it gone. I want Petra here with me. “The same way you did. You’re not the only one who came alive over the course of a week, Pet.”

“That day in Mulberry’s, I never would’ve guessed we were both injured birds. How did she get her name changed? Isn’t there a rule that your stalker can’t change their name to yours?”

There’s a numbness creeping up my arms, the warning signs of an oncoming panic attack. I rest my head against the steering wheel to take deep breaths. “I don’t know. She missed her parole check last month and trashed my sister’s porch. When Amanda reported it they didn’t say anything about a name change.”

There is a long pause. Petra sniffles, while I focus on deep breaths to keep myself together. “You don’t sound okay,” Petra says.

“I’m not.” I huff out a laugh that’s not funny. “You don’t either.”

“I’m getting better. I thought she hurt you and there was nothing I could do about it. Can I just…have Amanda’s number or something? Is that okay?”

“Of course.” It’s an easy request. While I don’t want Kinley anywhere near Amanda, I want Petra fully integrated into my life. I want to build one together. “I’m texting it now, and my Mom’s. Grant’s number, too. We don’t talk much, but I want you to have as many points of contact as possible, baby. I won’t let this happen again.”

“You can’t control her, Reed. But thank you for explaining.”

I’m too far away to hug her. To hold her and tell her what she means to me and that all of this is a smokescreen for Kinley to get her way. I want to wrap myself around her and explain the full truth of that night and how it still haunts me. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about her when I was there. I should’ve.”

“What do we do about her?” Petra asks.We. We’re still we. “Kinley is there, andshe knows about us. She called you her husband. She—oh God—Reed, she listened to our recording in Portland.”

“It was on my phone. Fuck, fuck,fuck.It kills me that she listened to myscenes,much less—” I open the car door and vomit root beer all over the asphalt.

“Reed, I’m so sorry. I wish I were there. You’re not in this alone anymore. You have me, and my siblings. Darin can help. We’ll get through this together.”

My hands shake so hard that I can barely hold on to my phone. “No, I’m glad you’re not here. I don’t want her anywhere near you.”

“Can she get to you?”

“No. I’m in a hotel, but—damn it.Amanda. My mom. She knows where they are.”

“Protect your family,” Petra says. “We’ll talk later.”

I hesitate to hang up. I don’t want to cause her any more pain. I’m in freefall over Kinley listening to one of the most amazing, transformative experiences of my life. My stomach turns, and I swallow hard so I don’t puke again.

“I want to be with you, Pet, but I have to check on my family before I can go.”

“I’d do the same,” Petra says, but her voice is hoarse. “Take care of them, but keep in touch, okay? I’m still worried. If you decide to fly out, I’ll pick you up in Portland—just give me a date and time.”

I don’t say it, but I’m worried too. “I’m going to fly out as soon as possible.”

It’s the wrong time to add in words of affection we’ve never said, but I want to. Petra and I are both quiet for a moment. She’s wrestling with something and I’m falling apart. I wish we could crawl under the sheets together and block out the world, the way we did before.

“I wish I could’ve protected you from her, Petra.” Grief sweeps through me, ice cold and burning. “I didn’t want her to stain your life. She’s determined to destroy all my relationships, but I hoped that by starting over in Oregon, she wouldn’t follow. If I could turn back time and prevent her from hurting you, I—”

“Don’t.” Petra cuts short my apology. “I choose you anyway. You don’t have to walk alone because her darkness might touch the people around you. You deserve the light, Reed.”

She believes it, but I don’t. I see a million ways to mess this up further, but none to make it better. “I’ll see you soon, Pet. Promise.”

I hang up and immediately call Amanda. As it rings, I shift the car into drive and speed for the freeway. “It was Kinley at the park,” I say as soon as she picks up the phone. “Lock the doors, call Mom, and have her come over. I don’t know what Kinley’s planning—”

“What? How do you know?”

“She called Petra—” An unknown number crosses my screen. “I think this is her. I gotta answer.”

“Wait, don’t—”