Page 96 of Kiss and Tell

Mom had called just after he finished talking to Killian. Typically, she didn’t reach out when he was filming, but he hadn’t thought anything of it at the time. Now, he wondered if she’d been fishing to see if Rhiannon had arrived. No doubt Rhiannon’s mom had been sitting there with her, the two of them working themselves up into a frenzy, hoping for his and Rhiannon’s reconciliation. Mom had been hands off since he graduated high school, letting him make his own adult decisions about everything.

Except Rhiannon.

When it came to her, Mom always took a very keen and sudden interest in his life, offering lots of advice, constantly dropping her name into conversations, keeping him abreast of his ex’s life even though he never asked. He’d planned to talk to her about Rhiannon in person over Christmas, but clearly he should have approached it on the phone.

Miles had told Mom he’d call her back tonight because he and Joey were heading to the pub for dinner and a drink. He’d thought it odd when she asked the name of the pub, but he brushed it off as no big deal.

“She told you I was here.”

Rhiannon nodded. “I didn’t tell her or my mom about your email.”

“Why not?”

“I knew it would upset them and?—”

She stopped talking when Miles scoffed. “This has nothing to do with them.”

Rhiannon sighed, taking a different tack. “Why are you so angry at me all of a sudden? I thought the other night, when we talked, things were cool between us, but now, I can tell you’ve blocked my number.”

“I’m not angry, Rhiannon.”

She crossed her arms. “It feels like you are. You know, I wasn’t proposing we get back together, Miles.”

He scoffed. “I’ve got at least a dozen photos and countless texts from you that suggest otherwise.”

Rhiannon had looked sad at the beginning of the conversation, but he saw the brief flash of annoyance in her eyes when he called her on her bullshit. She recovered quickly, tempering the anger and resuming the role of injured party. She really was a wonderful actress.

“I’ve missed you, Miles. I’m back in New York now, and being there without seeing you feels wrong. I mean, we should be getting an upside-down slice at Rosa’s, hanging out at Grover Cleveland Park, and watching a Mets game in the nosebleed section. And I don’t mean as a couple. Just as friends.”

He tilted his head at that lie, letting her know he’d already called her on that. “We can’t be just friends, Rhiannon. Past history has proven that.”

She sighed. “We’re older now, Miles. Wiser. I think we can. I’d like to try anyway.”

“No.”

Miles was already over this conversation. He had a million things he could say to her, things he probably should say, but anger like that takes a lot of energy. He was tired of being mad. Tired of being sad and depressed and bitter and vulnerable.

Lucy and Joey had washed all those shitty feelings away and replaced them with emotions that felt good. Happiness, humor, peace, a feeling of truly belonging, and of not only being accepted for who he was but also loved for it.

Rhiannon blinked a few times, frowning in confusion. He got why. He’d never told her no, always letting himself be swept back. “I don’t understand. I swear I’m not asking for more.”

She never was. Until she did.

Miles gave her a sad smile. “I know you believe that, but it doesn’t matter. I’m putting myself first this time, which means I’m moving forward. I’m not interested in looking back.”

Those words seemed to hurt her, her eyes suddenly glassy with tears. The less generous part of himself wondered if they were sincere or if this was more acting on her part.

Rhiannon looked away, swiping at her eyes. “You’re my best friend, Miles. Even during the times when we aren’t talking, I always know if I need you, if I call, you’ll pick up the phone.”

In the past, he would have. Hell, even just a month ago…he did. But he couldn’t do that anymore. “I’m not going to pick up the phone again.”

This times, tears flowed down her cheeks, and he understood this was no act. He hated hurting her, but if that was what he had to do to convince her once and for all, then that was what he had to do. “You need to move forward too,” he said gently.

Her eyes narrowed slightly. “You’ve met someone else.”

He refused to answer that. He hadn’t even told Joey about his change of heart, so he wasn’t going to tell Rhiannon first.

She sniffled. “You know, a small part of me always thought it would be you and me at the end of the day.”